Unleash My Pain
by Airalynn
Summary: A trip to Azkaban is ordered after Harry is unmistakeably framed for murder. Unknown ministers also? Even Hermione, his fiance, is left alone for her seventh year as he is locked away, but something happens when he is released... His worst fear.
1. Chapter One: Defying Rules

**Prologue: It was only a few weeks before the start of seventh year began. Harry Potter, 17, lay in his bed staring at the ceiling. Too many things happened in the last couple of years, but Harry had finally officially killed Voldemort. Harry thought everything would be better after Voldemort was finally gone, but he was wrong. Terribly wrong...**

* * *

**Chapter One:**

**Defying Rules**

Harry let out a wide yawn when he looked to the side to see his owl, Hedwig, gone from her cage. She was off delivering letters and receiving new ones in return to give to Harry himself. Harry lay across his bed and recognizing every detail in his ceiling that he never cared about before. This was one of the abnormal days that he would do odd things without even noticing.

He looked above and noticed small indentations in his ceiling. Where they were from, he didn't know. He didn't care either, but he found it rather suspicious. These dents were small, but still quite large. He wondered if maybe the idea of his past was what made the indentations. He shuddered at the thought, because he didn't want to think about it right now. **(Note: This is explained later if you're confused.)**

Harry could barely move in his bed without getting a shot of pain through his entire body, and he grinded his teeth. He had bruises throughout his body and cuts along his stomach, legs, and chest, but mostly his arms. He was massaging a bleeding cut when he heard a tap in the distance. He looked to his side to find a snow white owl tapping away at his window glass.

"Hedwig,"

He had spoken rather joyously, but as soon as he moved he clutched his side. A large bruise was formed on his side in a usual shape, but he couldn't tell what it was by looking down on it. He was locked in his room so a mirror was unavailable also. Harry opened the window quietly, and Hedwig had perched herself upon Harry's desk and held out her leg generously.

He said a silent thank you and untied the three letters from Hedwig's leg. Her amber eyes looked up at him with desire and he patted her head lightly, before handing her a scrap of bread. Harry still got not much to eat at all since he was still under his Aunt and Uncle's control. The biggest meal he had all week was a piece of bread and cheese. Otherwise it was usually bread. Small portions of bread too.

Harry placed her back in her cage and shut the door with a snap. It was two in the morning and Hedwig was exhausted. She closed her eyes, after gulping down her bread, and fell into a peaceful sleep. This was unusual because owls usually slept during the day, but Hedwig was different then other owls. Something about her showed that entirely. She might be different, but Harry still admired her. She was the most dependable owl he'd ever encountered, and he couldn't help but love her.

Harry sat on his bed and coughed a little from the bruise across his throat. His entire throat was bruised and his eyes were a bit fuzzy. His left eye was blackened, and his right was a little puffy. His vision was fuzzy, but he could still make out the letters quite better then he assumed. He ripped open the first one:

_Harry,_

_Mum said you could stay at the burrow for the rest of the summer! It's your last summer and I forbid you to stay at those god forsaken muggle's home any longer! Mum is worried and Dad, well, he is getting on better. We still stay out of contact with Percy, Merlin knows what he's up to, but I can't wait to see you! Hermione has been here the last couple of days and she's had some difficulties since yesterday. I'd explain it in this letter, but Hermione wished to tell you in person. Hope you had a better summer. See you sooner then you think, because we (me and Hermione) are picking you up tomorrow!_

_Ron_

Harry laughed. He declared that this summer was the worst ever and Ron said '_Hope you had a better summer.'_ Harry couldn't help but snicker silently. Harry wondered what Ron meant about Hermione having difficulties. He wanted to know if something was wrong, but he couldn't ask her right away. She wished to talk in person, so he would. At least he would be picked up tomorrow.

Just the person he was thinking about as he opened up the second letter. It was from Hermione and he could smell the aroma of vanilla. It was her favorite scent, Harry noticed, because every time he had received a letter from her it smelled strongly of the scent. He couldn't complain though, because he liked it too.

_Dear Harry,_

_I'm sure Ron had told you already that something happened this summer. I was going to tell you in person, but I don't think I could bare the thought. Yesterday evening my father was killed in a car accident. You know what it feels like to lose a parent, and I might need you in this situation more then ever. I can't help but think it was my fault. Mother always says it's not, but I know it is. My father and I had a disagreement last night on the phone, and it got a little out of hand. I was going to apologize on the phone this morning before he left, but he wouldn't speak to me. Then this happened. I shouldn't have had such a big row with him, and I miss him so very much. I'm sorry that this must be hard for you when you have lost both of your parents and I'm here upset because I lost one. I'm sorry if this makes you angry because I am so upset, but you have no idea how close I was to him Harry. I need you now, more then ever, and help me through this. Something tells me I can't go through this any longer. Please understand. I can't wait to see you._

_Love you always, Hermione_

Harry read this letter through about twenty times before he folded it and slipped it back into the envelope. He had only met Hermione's father once and he defined him as a very humorous man. Harry thought Mr. Granger was quite funny and he could see where Hermione got her gentle personality from. He met most of her family, but they were different then he expected.

Hermione's mother was a shy type. She wasn't really talkative, but her father was. He kept pulling Harry into a conversation every minute he could. Harry didn't mind, but he thought he was a bit worried about his living habits. Harry had told Hermione's parents about the Dursleys and Hermione's father had seemed quite amazed about how they treated Harry. Her father offered him food and shelter, but Harry had politely refused his offer.

Even now Harry wished he didn't, because something bad was happening under the very roof of Vernon and Petunia Dursley's house. A horror that could scare anyone and could leave people talking for hours was happening. He needed to leave this place, and hopefully he would soon. He tore open the last letter.

_Mr. Potter,_

_Congratulations and welcome into your last year of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. We are pleased that you are attending your last year and good luck. A list of your school books and supplies are attached to this sheet and you are to meet in a separate compartment on the Hogwart's train. You will join nine other classmates for directions regarding your last year. We wish you luck in your seventh year and congratulations on making it this far._

_Albus Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. _

Harry smiled weakly at this letter. Only one more year, and in less then four weeks he would be returning home to Hogwarts. He could escape this place and he would be free from the Dursley's. He flipped to the second page and found a list of new, yet quite familiar, books he would need for his seventh year.

_Here is a list of books:_

_The Standard Book of Spells (Grade 7) _

_By Miranda Goshawk_

_Top Level Potions for Everyday Potions_

_By Mark Guils_

_Complete Book of Curses and Uses_

_By Haften Jins_

_Creatures for a Creature's Creature._

_By Shawn Panna_

_The supplies you are needed to bring are as followed and must be exact. You might find some a bit of a challenge. Ten things:_

_1 wand_

_1 cauldron (pewter, standard size 4)_

_2 bottles of golden ink_

_2 vials of Pondering Powder_

_Quills_

_1 telescope_

_1 set of dress robes_

_Rolls of parchment_

Harry wondered why it said some would be a bit of a challenge to find, but paid no mind to it what so ever. He had seen these things before, but none really mattered. His eyes then lay on the word 'dress robes.' There was going to be another ball... damn. His worst event that he had ever participated in, but maybe this was just a seventh year thing. Hopefully it was.

Harry folded the last letter up, slipped it back inside its addressed envelope and set them on his desk. He pulled out a piece of parchment and was about to write something, when he stopped. He heard a pounding coming down the hallway and the sound projected through his room.

_Boom. Boom. Boom._

It got louder and Harry felt a shiver run through his spine. He heard the feet coming and could tell which foot from which. Left, right, left, right, left. He could smell the scent of a sleeping cream that Aunt Petunia used on her face to stop her wrinkles from growing, but Harry knew it wasn't his Aunt. It was his Uncle.

"Potter!" A voice boomed from the hall.

There was a shuffle of feet and a large growl noise coming from the voice outside the door. The clicking and scratching noise of the locks that clicked when they were unlocked. Harry's heart raced as he meant to stash the letters, but was too late. His uncle stormed into his room and noticed the letters he was shoving under his pillow with fear in his shaky body.

"You are supposed to be sleeping!" His uncle's purple voice growled loudly. "What have I told you about that ruddy owl? What's this?" He asked after pushing Harry out of the way and throwing his pillow off.

"Nothing," Harry said hastily as he fell off the bed and onto the floor. He winced again.

"LETTERS! I TOLD YOU NO MORE LETTERS BOY!" His uncle shouted and Harry was surprised if there were still people in the house sleeping. "PICKING YOU UP TOMORROW?" He shouted and had un-expectantly slapped Harry across the face. "YOU DEFIED MY RULES!" Vernon shouted louder.

"I'm sorry," Harry pleaded as he shuffled across the floor in fear.

"Oh, no, apologies from you boy, you _will_ pay the toll." Vernon glared.

Harry couldn't help but gulp in fear and everything after that moment was fuzzy. Harry had become unconscious at that moment. He was about to fight back when everything had become black.

* * *

About four hours of being out he had begun to stir. Pain was all through-out his body and bleeding cuts were all over him. His face sheared with pain and he had barely enough strength to move onto his bed. He didn't care if he bled through out the night, but he needed to do something else. 

He needed to free himself from this pain and give himself a different pain. He opened his bedside table drawer and pulled out a ratting sock. He stuck his hand inside and pulled out a wedge of broken glass and gripped it in his fingers. He looked up to the ceiling to find more indentations and looked back to the glass gripped in his hand. He took the wedge and brought it quickly against his forearm.

A large drop of blood dripped down his arm and onto his whitened sheets. Tears formed in his eyes as he did this again, and again, and again. Stopping before it got out of hand, he place it back into the drawer. This was an odd way of relieving pain, but what more did he have? He cried into his bloody hands as they dripped with thick drops of deep red blood.

Sticky blood began to dry as he fell into a painful sleep. He didn't know why he did these things, but it's the only thing that seemed to come to his mind. Harry had been through a lot and being beaten by his uncle wasn't helping much. Harry had nothing else to do, but cause himself more pain. He would be out of the house in less then eight hours, or hopefully Ron would be here by then.

The time flew by and Harry had woken sleepily at eight in the morning. He had gotten only about three hours worth of sleep, but he insisted he didn't need it. He dressed slowly that morning because of the pain through-out his body and he had some difficulties. Harry stood in his dressed form and limped his way to the window.

He picked up a quill and quickly scratched something on a piece of parchment. The paper was crimpled, but it was all he had left since last term. He scribbled the message as Hedwig awoke by the noise of hastily scratching of quill on parchment. She hooted wonderingly.

_Ron,_

_If you are awake. Pick me up now. It's an emergency!_

_Harry_

Harry tied it to Hedwig's leg before turning around and watching her fly from her cage and through the window after Harry had released her from the cage. Harry took a bar out of his desk and opened his window. He broke through a barrier; his uncle had put it up, and pulled the pieces into his room so it made no sound. There was already a hole, just enough for Hedwig to fit through, but not himself.

Harry assumed the Dursleys were still sleeping, because there were no loud noises what so ever. He would have heard loud feet from Vernon, loud squeals of happiness from Petunia, or loud yelling about small breakfasts from Dudley. God, how he hated mornings.

He looked into his reflection in his window glass. He couldn't make out every detail, because his window was tinted yellow, but he could still see each bruise on his body. He then noticed something. He moved closer to his reflection to notice that the large bruise on his throat were two large handprints: Vernon's.

He couldn't have Mrs. Weasley see him in this state. She would be too worried about anything. He was still sore, but other matters were at hand. He shuffled his feet back to his trunk and packed quickly. He pulled out an odd arrangement of clothes, but it would hide all his marks.

He pulled on a long sleeve black shirt with long olive colored pants. He then wrapped a scarf around his throat to hide the marks on his neck and set a pair of sunglasses around his puffy, black eyes. He lastly put on a black hat to hide any marks that he didn't know about and a pair of wool gloves to hide his hands. He looked at him self. He looked ridiculous, but there was no time to spare in such a crisis.

He looked out the window and saw something move. A noise then came towards his window and a compartment out of no where showed up. Harry realized it was the trunk of a car, but the car was invisible. Harry dashed around his room and shoved all his things inside and then knocked on the hood of the trunk to tell that it was full. Harry then waited as a door opened and he saw the thin markings of the car turn to its side.

Harry grabbed Hedwig and was first to see Ron's worried face before anyone else. He then saw Hermione in the back when he climbed in and set Hedwig aside of her. She had puffy eyes and Harry reached back to give her a hug and winced slightly from the pain.

"Thank god." Harry said after releasing Hermione.

"Harry," Ron said awkwardly. "What are you wearing?" He asked as he began to drive away from Surrey.

"Oh... umm, nothing." He said hastily. "I don't want to be seen." He said. It was the first thing that popped into his head.

"But," Ron started. "We're invisible... no one can see us." Ron looked at Harry as if he was retarded.

"Look I don't want to talk about it!" He said more powerfully as he turned to his side to look at Hermione.

She had puffy eyes too, but she couldn't seem to make a sound. It seemed like she was no longer talking to anyone, but that wasn't possible. She had begged Harry for his help in this un-likely matter, and he would stick by her as long as she needed him. She cried into her hands.

"Hermione," Harry spoke softly. "I'm sorry to hear about your father." He said gently.

"It's alright," Hermione hiccupped. "I'll get through this." She said and Ron made a coughing noise.

"Hey!" Ron exclaimed. "I've been trying to get you to talk to me after when you told me, but you wouldn't. You can talk to Harry though?" He asked in a joking wonder.

"I feel more comfortable, with Harry, Ron." She spoke softly.

"Why?" He wondered. "Because he's your _boy_friend?" He joked as he received a punch in the arm from Harry.

"No!" She said angrily. "He's an orphan! Meaning he has no parents! He's been through this Ron... you haven't." She said lightly.

Harry had knelt on his seat for a minute to move to the back to sit with Hermione. She was still crying as he stepped over the stick shift and stumbled into the back seat. Hermione turned to him, looked at him strangely, and then pulled him into a tight embrace.

"Ow, ow, ow..." Harry said trailing off.

"Sorry," Hermione apologized.

"No, it is alright." He reassured. "I'm just a little... sore." He said oddly.

Ron was looking through his rear-view mirror to listen and to watch closely. Ron squinted slightly and noticed something. He wondered something and looked back and forth from the sky line to the mirror before he spoke unexpectedly.

"Hey Harry," Ron started and Harry looked up through his sunglasses. "What's that gash on the side of your face?" He asked.

Harry felt along his side and his fingers pulled lightly across it. A long gash was in the side of his face that stretched from the bottom of his ear lobe to the middle of his cheek. He moved his scarf to hide it and turned. He stared out the window and said the first thing that popped into his head.

"Nothing." He said simply.

"What's that one?" Hermione asked as she pulled her own fingers across a scratch right under his glasses' rim. Harry recoiled away from the pain.

"Nothing," He said simply again.

"Come on Harry." Hermione said with a confused look on her face. "Where are these scratches coming from?" She asked.

"No where." He said and went to move back into the front seat.

He stopped. As he moved his scarf had gotten caught in the seat belt loop and had pulled off his neck completely. Hermione let out a gasp and Harry tried covering his neck back up, but Hermione had stopped him. Her eyes filled with more tears and Harry looked away, angry with himself.

"Harry," Hermione gasped. "What... what happened to you?" She asked in fear.

"Ron, this is why I said it was an emergency." He said hastily. "I should have told you, but…"

Harry pulled off his coat, sunglasses, gloves and hat. He didn't have bleeding cuts anymore, but his bruises were larger and darker then ever. He felt his face grow hot with embarrassment and Ron had shoved his foot on the brake pedal and they remained hovering in the air. Ron turned.

"What the hell Harry?" Ron asked, amazed and shocked beyond all belief.

"My... my..." He stuttered and Hermione took his scratched hand in hers.

"You didn't do this to yourself," Hermione started. "Did you?" She asked. She hoped the answer was no.

"No." He said quickly.

He couldn't tell her that he had been cutting himself. She would think things about him that he didn't want her to. Harry couldn't help but feel for her in this crisis, and being with her didn't allow secrets like that being told. He couldn't, not when she sits next to him crying about her father. Harry didn't blame her though.

"And the rest?" She wondered.

"My uncle," Harry mumbled. She had actually heard him though.

Hermione went to touch his chest, but he winced quite loudly. She tugged on the rim on his sweater to see underneath and she saw it. The hand marks, the bruises, the scars, and some bleeding scratches. Harry pulled his sweater back down quickly as she began to whisper to herself. He looked away, and he didn't want to look back at her to see more tears. That's what hurt the worst.

Hermione pulled him back into a hug and a rage of furiousness towards his muggle of an uncle. Ron shook his head in disbelief and turned back to his attention on the skyline. Harry was trying to push Hermione off of him and stop her tears from falling. She felt horrible, but instead she pulled Harry's face towards hers so they stared at each other.

"Why didn't you tell me?" She asked, whispering.

"Because," He said just as silently so Ron wouldn't hear as he began to blast music in the front of the car. "I didn't want to you worry."

Hermione did something at that moment. Hermione and Harry stared at each other when she pushed herself forward and kissed his lips gently. Tears flowed down her face as she felt the sudden movement against her lips as he kissed her back. She lay against him with tears in her eyes.

"You can tell me anything." She said. "I want you to know that."

"I do." He responded and kissed the top of her head.

* * *

**Author's Notes:**

**What do y'all think? Good enough to continue or shall it not be continued? Please tell me if it's _that_ bad. Which it probably is, but tell me anyways! Lol. If you wish to update I will in a week. Thanks y'all! I cleared up some mistakes on this chapter, so enjoy!**

**Airalynn**

**RE-POST: (SUNDAY) JUNE 10, 2005 – 5 days till the Half Blood Prince!**


	2. Chapter Two: Three Simple Words

**Chapter Two:**

**Three Simple Words**

Harry kept his arms around Hermione defensively. He was going to let no one hurt her, and he promised that. She had been through a lot, and this revealing fact about Harry cut her deeper then before. He kept his mouth shut about his own cutting. In risk of losing Hermione's trust, he figured it should be kept secret. It was his problem, and had nothing to do with her.

Ron hadn't spoken to him, and Hermione had fallen asleep on Harry's shoulder. When Ron quickly declared that the Burrow was coming into view, Harry shook Hermione awake. She rubbed her eyes tiredly and tried to wipe away the dried tears, but it wasn't working very well. Harry brushed a few stay hairs from her eyes before she turned and looked down at the grounds below.

She could see everything, and remembered everything. She saw a small sty with about eight pigs in it just down the road from the Burrow. She could see her cat, Crookshanks, chasing the gnomes again. Ron had once described them as "fat little Santa Clauses with fishing poles." Hermione just giggled awkwardly at the memory, well, it was awkward to Harry and Ron.

She just continued to look down at the grassy grounds. The grounds were full of the fresh green color that Hermione loved, but the trees were starting to shed their leaves. They wilted off each branch, and this is what Hermione hated worse about having fall on its way. She couldn't help but think that this was a little strange when it was the middle of August and not much had changed since during since summer.

Harry then looked down at the grounds too when a house had come into the clearing. The familiar and wonderful house, and belonged to Molly and Arthur Weasley. Harry loved it here, but he had a feeling that he was going to have to do some serious sneaking around with these bruises if he didn't want to be seen by Molly. Hermione had stayed quite when she had exited the car and entered the house.

"Harry, wait," Ron said when he exited the car as well and made to follow Hermione inside. Harry stopped.

"What?" He wondered, trying his best not to jump to conclusions.

"Look, why couldn't you tell me about how they were treating you?" Ron asked as he crossed his arms and leaned against a wall of the house.

"Ron, you know why." Harry said and Ron shook his head. "I'm supposed to watch what I write, and if anyone found out about it then something might have gone terribly wrong. My uncle," He shuddered a little. "Watched out the window constantly and he saw me the night your letter came in. That's why I never sent more then three letters the entire summer. I had to watch myself. For the first time in my life I was scared of my own family member. Who knows what would have happened if he found out I told people what he did. Who knows? He could have killed me because I had no magic with me. My wand was locked away for ages, and I wasn't allowed to use it. Every time I brought up something about school or wizards I'd get punished. I was scared."

"Harry, I-" Ron started but Harry had clearly cut him off. Harry knew he was going to apologize.

"No problem," Harry put on a weak smile. "I really need some rest though." He said with a small laugh to ease the tension.

"We'd better get you inside and cleaned up." Ron said and helped Harry inside, summoning their stuff through the windows.

When Harry had entered the house he was about to receive a hug from Molly herself, but she stopped. She stood there with fear in her eyes and a laughing Ginny walked in the room. Un-expectantly Ginny had stop laughing and let out a small scream when she laid eyes upon Harry. Molly was shaking a bit at the sight of the poor child and she drew him into a light, non hurtful, hug.

"Harry," Molly said. "What happened to you?" She asked.

"I'll explain later." He said hastily. "Or Ron will tell you later, but for now I need to sleep." He said sadly.

"Of course," She said with a sigh. "You remember where your room is I suppose?" She wondered.

Harry nodded. She shooed him towards the stairs where he climbed up each step with caution. Each step he took made his leg bones hurt even worse. The stairs were narrow and thin and it took a lot out of him. When he reached the top of the third flight of stairs he had finally reached the top floor. He walked down the narrow hall and into the second door on the left. This room he remembered well.

He entered the room and noticed his stuff already set up and neater then the way he packed. Hedwig was gone and was probably off hunting, but Harry hadn't cared at the moment. He removed his jacket for the second time and set it on the chair next to his bed. He turned when he heard a gentle knock on the door.

"Come in," He said as he breathed in quickly through his closed teeth as the pain in his arms seared. He looked to see Hermione enter the room with a tin box. "That isn't another _S.P.E.W_ thing is it?" Harry asked cautiously.

"No," Hermione said hastily. "It's a medical kit." She said and set it down on the chair where Harry had laid his jacket by.

"I need you to remove your shirt, please." She said gently as she opened her kit.

"Why?" Harry asked in confusion. "What are you going to do to me?" He asked as he saw her remove objects from her case that he had never seen before.

"Treat you," She said. "I took summer classes at Hogwarts and got taught how to heal by Madame Pomfrey. She wasn't too happy with the idea of teaching me, but it turned out alright at the end." She smiled. "Now, please remove your shirt." She said sweetly.

"Do I have to?" He asked childishly.

"Would you rather me smack one of your bruises really hard or take off your shirt?" She said provocatively. Harry didn't hesitate.

"Fine." He said angrily.

He sat on his bed as he pulled his shirt off of his non-fed body and Hermione shook her head. It was worse then she thought. He was covered in nothing but bruises and scars. His back had a large mark that was beginning to grow into a rather large scar. She couldn't remove the scars, but she could remove the bruises and maybe a few scratches.

She placed her hands on his shoulder, that were amazingly fine to her, and she moved her thumbs along the bruises underneath. He winced horribly as the pain shot through him like a bullet through a brain. She apologized softly and analyzed his back as she knelt behind him.

"Harry," She started. "Where is this scar from?" She wondered and he put his shirt of his left arm hastily and she hadn't noticed. He sighed.

"A weapon," He said simply. "It also dented the hell out of my ceiling." He growled and she sighed in unbelief. Why was this happening?

"What sort of weapon?" She asked as she started spreading pinkish paste along his bruises.

"A whip," He said and Hermione gasped silently. "It's alright. I can take pain easily, it doesn't matter. You shouldn't even be treating me. It's a waste of time." He said.

"Nothing is a waste of time." She said simple and he looked at her awkwardly.

"Games," He said. "You use to think games were a waste of time." He said and she smirked slightly.

"Maybe," She said gently. "But I've changed." She said.

"Touché you have." He mumbled. She grinned.

"It's alright." She grinned. "You can laugh. I won't be mad." She giggled gently under her breath.

Harry felt relief as she smoothed out the thick paste along his back. It felt cold and it soothed his aches and pains. His relief almost swallowed him up, but he had stopped it because something had jumped in his head. He twisted his head to the side to see her putting more paste on, and then looked to the floor.

"Hermione," Harry started. "I've been meaning to talk to you about something." He said gently so she didn't jump to conclusions.

"Anything," She said sweetly.

"In the car earlier," He said uneasily. "You sort of... well, umm... you did..." He went trailing off and she giggled.

"Kissed you?" She asked as a blush formed on his cheeks.

"Yeah, that!" He said quickly.

"What about it?" She wondered as she began to lather his shoulders in an oily substance that she had brought.

"Well," He gulped. "I was wondering why you had done it." He said and she gulped slightly too.

"Well, I suppose it's because I love you." She said gently and Harry had turned to face her.

"What do you mean?" He wondered.

"Well," She said. "I guess I've known for a while, but it hadn't drawn to my attention until the other day how much I _really_ cared for you. In the car, when I saw your scars, it hit me hard. I can't take seeing you like this." Without meaning to she had begun to tear and the water had filled her eyes. "I don't want to loose you." She whispered.

"You don't need to worry so much." Harry reassured. "I'll always be here for you. I promise." He said just as quite.

"Harry, I know I can't hold on forever. I know I can't, but I just can't help but wonder what I'd do without you." She cried. "In my dreams I see you gone and in my head I hear you scream. What if you died the night that V-Voldemort t-tried t-to k-kill y-y-you?" She asked watery.

"You won't have to find out." He smiled. "Never." He said more simply.

Hermione had dropped her head low and stared at the comforter of the bed before closing her eyes tight. Tears still fell from her eyes and Harry just smiled at her. He cupped her chin with his hand and pulled her head up. She kept her eyes closed, but he had laid a pleasurable and desirable kiss upon her lips.

"Harry," She said as she touched her lips fervently.

"I love you too, Hermione." He smiled.

Those three words! He had said those three simple words. She smiled in return and Harry wiped away a tear from her eye. She looked up as her teary eyes met his green ones and she sighed heavily. She leaned forward and kissed him back sweetly and she felt him kiss her again in return. She broke apart and pulled him into a hug. He wrapped his arms around her waist and smiled as he hugged her back.

"Alright," She said after wiping the tears from her eyes and pulling away. "Can you lie on your stomach, or is it too painful?" She wondered.

"It's painful, but I'll manage." He smiled.

She helped him roll onto his stomach where he let out a tight breath, but then it turned into a relaxing breathe. Hermione had once again begun lathering his shoulders with oil that made him feel like he was lying on a mountain of pillows. He was in heaven at this moment.

"Alright you need your rest." She said as she sniffled a bit. "I'll leave you be and let you rest." She said.

"No, please." He said as he shifted sideways on his twin size bed. "Lay with me, and stay with me." He pleaded.

"Why?" She wondered.

"Don't laugh," He said. "But I don't want _him_ to come back." He said sadly and in a whisper.

"Harry, _he_ won't come back. _He_ is a muggle." She said as she packed up her things and Harry grabbed her hand suddenly.

"Please?" He wondered. "You haven't slept in days and you said you needed me now more then ever. So please, stay?" He asked, pleading to her with everything he had to offer.

"Alright," She smiled weakly and lain next to him. "I just don't want to see you hurt anymore." She said.

She lay next to him and he snaked an arm up and over her. She wrapped herself in his arm and she sighed gently. It was true that she hadn't slept in days, but she felt a little uncomfortable about being in the same bed with Harry. Then, when she felt his touch, her comfort had returned to her. She knew this is where she needed to be, and she would stay here for as long as she could.

She let out a light and heavily sigh as she entwined her fingers with Harry's and turned her head to face him. Harry had once again opened his eyes and stared at her chocolate ones in satisfaction. She melted in his crystal ones with delight and desirable happiness that she longed for, for almost four years now.

"Hermione," He spoke softly.

"Hmm?" She made the sound lovingly.

"Thank you," He said. He kissed her lips. "For staying with me." He whispered.

She smiled and kissed him back as the pleasure ran through her like a cat after its prey. She loved him. She knew this for sure now, and she thought she would always love him like she does now. Maybe she will and maybe she won't.

She felt a slight movement against her bottom lip, and thinking this was too fast, she had obeyed anyways. She had felt the tongue of her loved one enter her mouth. It explored her mouth and she only moaned heavily. She did her fist intention and let her tongue roll with his. She pulled away for a breath.

"Sorry," Harry panted silently.

"It's alright," She responded with the same breath of pants. "It was nice." She smiled sheepishly.

"I am so tired." Harry said and his head flopped down on Hermione's shoulder.

"I know." She said and kissed him once again, quickly, so things didn't get too out of hand. "Sleep my love, sleep." She said gently.

"Good night 'Mione." He said softly.

"Good _morning, _Harry." She responded with a light giggled.

"What ever," He mumbled.

Harry had fallen asleep much quickly then her. She let her fingers wander up and down Harry's arm as he slept. She could feel every bruise, every cut, and every scar. She noticed something though. There were a series of cuts on the forearm of his left arm, but not his right. She found this a bit odd.

She wouldn't ask him, because he'd already been through enough. She, though, couldn't help but wonder. Why were some bigger then the others and why were they all in the same alignment? She shrugged it off and closed her eyes to sleep. A deep sleep would soon be bestowed upon her, and she could begin her heavily dreams once again. She sighed heavily for the last time.

Her fingers were still entwined with Harry's as she fell into a peaceful sleep. Her head was positioned so that the lips of their sleeping bodies were touching slightly. Hermione then began her dreams in hopes of happiness, but she was wrong... very wrong.

_Hermione sat in the hall of Hogwarts. She was surrounded by books and was flipping through the pages of one in particular. She was hastily reading beyond the books reasons and learning from it all. She had it mesmerized and she had it prepared in her head already... memorized._

"_Hermione?" A voice called. _

_Hermione sat up against the wall and began to blend into the wall. She was paper thin now and she had the exact same tone in color as the wall. The voice went by and she noticed it was none other then Harry Prick Potter. That obviously wasn't his middle name, but that's what she called him._

_After he had passed Hermione had summoned, and stolen Harry's invisibility cloak. She went to a room that only she knew about and entered it. It was filled with dark magic objects. She had fortune telling tools and she also had a series of books all about death. She sat at a table and looked into a bowl of greenish liquid. She watched._

"_Granger..." A voice bellowed in a high pitch._

"_Master," She said sweetly. "Greetings, milord," She said in pleasure._

"_Granger, have you discovered the answer?" He asked in a hasty manner._

"_Not yet master," She said. "I'm about a centimeter away. I have the details, but not the entire answer." She said softly._

"_GET IT!" The voice demanded. "Or you shall meet your maker." He threatened and she shuttered._

"_Don't worry master." She said strongly. "This man will be dead once I am through with him." She said._

"_He better be, or it will be you instead." He hissed and Hermione nodded._

"_Of course Master." She nodded again in a bow._

"_Farewell." He said simply and the green liquid had disappeared._

_The grounds were dark and the sky was pitch black. She could here the howls of the common ware wolves at the perfect full moon. Hermione shuffled through her supplies to a chemistry set type thing where she began to boil a pinkish liquid. It oozed from the sides where she swiped it into a flask and she set it on the desk._

_She looked out at the monthly full moon and she let out a sigh. Her tongue rolled around in her mouth and she took the flask and swallowed it all at once. A shot of lightning slashed through her window and hit her directly in the chest. She screeched in agony as she fell to her knees._

"_Damn it." She hissed._

_Then she felt her tongue become elongated and her face thinner. What she noticed most was her teeth. Her tongue rolled against them lightly and she had immediately known her potion was a success. She had fangs, and she was finally a full, bloodsucking, human killing vampire that could once kill anyone._

"_You will never forget the day you hurt me." She said. "You will die for my revenge!" She hissed out the window. "Be afraid, Harry Potter!"_

**Author's Notes:**

**I thought as a little cliffy I'd stop at the end of the dream. I've only gotten ten reviews and I feel very disappointed in that. So show me some love guys and review... PWEEZ! FOR THE LOVE? Lol. Hope you enjoy! I WILL NOT BE UPDATING NEXT WEEK, because of the new Harry Potter book's release.**

**Airalynn**

**Updated: (Saturday) July 9, 2005 – 6 DAYS TILL HALF BLOOD PRINCE!**

**To My Reviewers:**

**Luarra – Well interesting that you think that. Lol, thanks for the Email by the way!**

**m1s7ress – If there is grammatical errors it probably isn't my fault. I use a document thing that fixes mistakes for it self and half the time the changes are wrong. So, apologies, but sometimes I miss the mistakes. I don't have very good eye sight.**

**toga party – Cute name, lol. My idea for this chapter was something like that, but your idea was good. Maybe you should write a story :P**

**sakura-sweetie – You make it sound like it's the best thing ever, and I assure you that it isn't that great... but thanks for the compliment!**

**Amelia Black Chancery – Thank you. Simply Thank You. Hehe.**

**PD – And that's exactly what they're gonna do! Lol, HELP!**

**pikeman900 – Oh, something will be done to them alright. Just you wait and see. –evil laughs- -**

**missradcliffe – Well I can't wait either... I HATE SUSPENSE! Lol. I have my book pre-orders and I'm going to sit at the post office for the entire day until it comes:P**

**SoccorQueen1556 – I was debating whether to update or not. Just to see how'd you respond, but I'm not _that_ mean so here you are! I was interested in seeing if you would freak as much as I took you for, lol. Hope you enjoy, and out of curiosity… what _would_ you do if I didn't update? Or do I not want to know? –shudders- :P**

**Cyn – I think love is a bit _strong_ of word for this story, hmm? Lol, just fooling around. I hope you like this chapter. I don't think it's that bad, but that's also _my_ opinion, when I want _yours_. hehe Hope you like and I'll be nice and do this: hugs back :P**

**ALSO THANK YOU:**

**I want to thank Amelia Black Chancery, dan-fan2007, pikeman900, sakura-sweetie, and SoccerQeen1556. Thank you for putting me on your favorites lists. You're awesome guys! Lol.**


	3. Chapter Three: Strike Three

**Chapter Three:**

**Strike Three**

Hermione woke up quickly and pulled her hand to her chest. She felt the speeding heart race as it pumped blood through her shaky body. She took a couple of deep breaths and shoved her thumb into her mouth. She explored the small squares of bone and noticed nothing had changed. It was a nightmare. She didn't have fangs, and she wasn't _really_ going to kill Harry.

She looked to her side to find her sleeping crush on his stomach, still, and in an uneasily wake able sleep. She sat her hands to his scarred face and shook her head. What was happening to them? They claimed they loved each other, but Hermione was having dreams about killing him. His uncle had nearly beaten him to death, and she sat here doing nothing, but staring at him.

Her soft chocolate eyes were filled with guilt and sympathy towards the boy. Bad things always happened to him, but why exactly did this? What could make such a gentleman turn into a slave? He specifically said he was being punished for sending letters to his friends, _pst_, that's what made Hermione sick to her stomach. **(Note: That 'pst' thing is a noise, and not a misspelling... continue:P)**

How could she have let this happen? She had lost a father, a friend, and she had also lost something else over the summer: her happiness. She thought Harry's presence would be a sight for sore eyes and make her happier then ever, but this gruesome fact that happened to Harry's summer was about as painful as having three hundred knives plunged into your chest. It cut her so deep that she couldn't explain it, and she didn't know if she would ever be able to.

Harry lay sleeping on Hermione's left side and he slept like it was nothing. It was like nothing ever happened and it was normal, but it wasn't. Hermione's fingers were entwined with Harry's and that's when she felt it. The spark that told her she was going to be happy had finally returned. In her grasp she held it, and it would travel with her for as long as she could hold on.

Then her mind shifted back to her dream. Was this an odd coincidence that Hermione had seen Harry in pain and then dreamt about causing the pain? She wouldn't tell him about the dream, because of safe keepings. Both Harry and Hermione were alike in a way by keeping one secret held dear to them and they would not speak of it. Hermione kept her dreams to herself, and Harry kept his cutting to himself.

What Hermione didn't know was the cutting, and something told Harry he should tell her, but remained silent. There were the Pros and Cons about it. For example a Pro could be her not having to worry, but a Con could be her being mad because he _didn't_ tell her. This was confusion beyond all beliefs and Harry would stick to his word by promising himself that he would never tell her.

Hermione's thin, long fingers had caressed the cheek of her sleeping dream and she smiled weakly. Harry would protect her, and she knew this. Something, though, told her that she would need to protect him. Something would happen, and she could feel it close by in the midnight sky. It was dark.

They had slept nearly fourteen hours, but I guess it paid off. Neither of them had gotten more then three hours of sleep for the past couple of weeks. Hermione, in fact, hadn't slept at all one night. She spent the entire night writing in a book and jotting her thoughts down without even a thought about sleeping. She felt her eyelids get heavy again, but she blinked away the feeling.

She couldn't fall asleep again, because they had slept long enough already, in her opinion anyways. The sun was beginning to rise and she yawned slightly as she pulled the strings of pitch black hair from Harry's eyes. Rubbing her thumb gently across his cheek she felt him shiver. She went to stop when a hand had grabbed her. She jumped slightly.

"I'm sorry," Harry apologized. "I didn't mean to scare you, but I thought you were someone else." He said sleepily. "You scared me too," he said.

"Sorry, but… someone else?" Hermione breathed heavy from her jump. "Who else would it be?" She tried to ask as gently as possible.

"I don't know," He said softly. "I just thought you were already up." He said.

Hermione smiled weakly. Poor kid was even afraid to sleep for too long. She couldn't erase the pain that he had suffered through, and she couldn't erase his memory. She needed to find her own way to free him from this, and she would not let another thing hurt him. One thing had already, and he was lucky to be alive today in Hermione's opinion.

She didn't understand this at all. Why was this all happening? Too many things he already suffered through and yet, they never cease to end. Never had Hermione felt so helpless towards a best friend. She had lost her father and she was moping about it when her best friend was still alive, but barely. She loved him, and she somehow realized that she always had.

"I'm sorry Harry," She sighed as she pulled her knees to her chest and buried her face into her knees. She cried gently.

"I told you Hermione," He reassured. "There is no need to be sorry for scaring me." He said and she shook her head.

"No Harry," She paused. "I'm sorry I can't save you. I can't delete your past, because it has already happened." She said.

"Hermione, you shouldn't even be worried about me." He spoke gently. "I know what it's like to lose a father, because I have lost Sirius. He was the closest thing I had and a death eater had taken him from me." He tried speaking gently so it didn't come as a happy matter. "I love you Hermione, and I'll be here for you. You have a reason to be sad, but you have no reason to worry."

Hermione had been lost in thought again for a few minutes. Every word rushed through her head like a bullet. Never was she going to forget the day she got the phone call about her dad. She was never going to forget the sight of when she first saw Harry. Covered in bruises, and still acting practically normal. Then she remembered something.

Last night. The darkness had swallowed the room completely, but Hermione remember something that happened on that dark night. She remembered the series of lines that were scrawled across Harry's left forearm. Hermione remembered the scratches and every scar on that arm. She stared at him.

"Harry," She said gently to not seem so suspicious. "Can I see your arm for a minute?" She wondered.

"Uhh, sure?" He asked confused as he flopped his right arm onto her lap.

"Left, please," She said sweetly. Harry had suddenly hugged his arm protectively.

"Why?" He asked hastily and Hermione made a click sound with her tongue. She knew he was definitely hiding something.

Whether he would tell her the truth or a cover lie, she didn't care at all. She needed to know something that would explain those marks. Harry's mind flashed to the chunk of glass that he had cut himself with. He couldn't let her see his arm, because what could she possibly say? Never could he, but he didn't have a choice.

Her eyes were filled with horror and sadness as she tugged at his sleeve. If only he could close his eyes and have his scratches go away, but it wasn't that simple. They were still there and a burning sensation occurred when Hermione had released them to fresh air. She sighed and Harry looked to the floor. She knew, and she would say something. He was most definitely sure she would.

"Harry," Hermione said as she tried to hold back the hidden spring of tears that were on the verge of breaking. "Where are these scratches from?" She asked.

"They are... umm, well, they..." He stuttered and Hermione gave him a poignant look at his scars. Her thumb rolled against them lightly and Harry jumped back. "Ouch!" He screeched. "They are from Hedwig alright," he breathed. "It was an accident."

Hermione looked to the side of Harry's bed and looked at Hedwig for a moment. Hermione swore she saw Hedwig glare at Harry and she crossed her arms. She took a deep breath and stared at him with amazement. She spoke gently at first, and hoping it wouldn't get too loud.

"You said you would never lie to me." She said.

Tears began to flow out her eyes, and she couldn't stop them. The water leaked down her cheeks with a never ending feeling to them. Hermione felt her heart rip in half. She had not long ago confessed her love to him, and he lied to her. Trust was a key ingredient to a relationship, and he couldn't even give her that. What was going on?

Her heart was now slowly pumping with disgrace towards this man that she believed she loved. He hurt her not only physically, but mentally. He had taken her heart and then tore it in half. Did he actually mean to do this though? She turned, walking for the door with tears in her eyes, and he stopped her.

"Wait Hermione," Harry said with confusion. "What do you mean?" He asked as he analyzed her tearing eyes. "I've never lied to you." He assured.

"Harry," She growled. "You just did." She had walked out with a slam of the door.

Running down the hall of the burrow she had run into an empty room and sprawled herself across the floor. Never would she be able to forgive him. She knew he had done those things to himself, and he couldn't even tell her that. Maybe he was scared of her, or maybe he just didn't trust her.

She buried her head into her arms and cried into the floor of the empty, dark room. Her cries echoed through out the room and she laid there like a vegetable. She felt she was paralyzed and didn't want to move. She laid there, head in her arms, and crying over something that didn't seem too big of a deal to another, but this was more then anyone could have guessed to her.

His veracity meant the world to her. She wanted him to be open and not keep anything from behind her back. She, though, had only noticed that she was actually hiding something from him. She hid her dream from him. She had just yelled at the man she had loved since she was eleven and threw it away. Only a day they spent together, and even that wasn't enough.

She wanted to love him. She wanted to ease his pain, but she couldn't. She couldn't do anything without hurting him more in another way. She would never forgive herself if she knew she had only caused him more pain. If she was going to help him, then she had to return to him. The only problem was that returning would have to include telling him that she was wrong, but she wasn't sure if she _was_ wrong.

She kept her face to the floor as her tears cried a puddle and trailed down different paths of skin and wood. She took a deep breath. She wanted to know why he did these things, she was completely sure that he did those marks to himself, but why would he do that? How could he do that? How could he take the pain and find the strength to cut himself? It didn't make sense.

She moved. Her head had snapped up as she heard the sharp creek of wood on its hinges. She looked at saw the man that she _really_ didn't want to see again. He stood there with confusion and hurt in his eyes and Hermione glared gently at him before she tore her teary eyes away from him.

She couldn't look at him without having memories run through her mind. She wanted to disappear and never return to this hell. She never wanted to look him in the face knowing that he harmed himself at the same time as being abused by a guardian. She couldn't do it, and she had to find someway to vanish. She, right now, didn't know whether to scream or cry.

She scurried into the corner of the room, and for some reason she wished she could blend into the wall. She did it in her dreams. She had nothing to be afraid of, because she wasn't really a vampire, so she didn't have to be scared. Her glossy chocolate eyes looked at him in repugnance. His lies sickened her to death. Then she stopped getting into nasty thoughts about death. What if _she_ was the reason why he cut himself like that? What if it were _she_ who cut _her_self? Why would _she_ do it?

"Hermione," Harry said with sadness. "Can we at least talk, please?" He pleaded, but Hermione didn't back down.

"No." She said bluntly. "There is nothing to talk about." She said, and then paused. "Unless, you are willing to tell me: why you have started cutting yourself." She said acidly and put emphasis on the word cutting.

"Cutting myself?" He asked with a large gulp. "How could you possibly think that?" He asked in pure outrage.

"Your arm," She pointed.

A stain was in a perfect, straight line was soaking through his long sleeve on his pure white shirt. He made to cover it, but it was no use. The blood was just too visible. Harry had done it again, and Hermione could do nothing but cry her fears away. She felt hurt and scared. Soon she felt her heart disappear from her body once he had once again spoken to her.

"I told you," He said and Hermione jumped to her feet.

"You told me a lie!" She yelled. "You've been cutting your arm to get rid of the pain and blaming it on Hedwig!" She said sharply. "Don't lie to me Harry." She snipped.

"How would you know anyways?" He asked and she crossed her arms.

"Just because I'm smart enough to tell the difference between a cut and a scratch doesn't mean you should try fooling anyone else." She glowered at him. "So, it's true... isn't it?" She asked delicately.

"No." He said quickly, and Hermione had jumped once again.

"I thought you'd be smart enough to listen to me. Stop lying to me Harry! I mean its one thing the first time, but this is the third time. Now tell me the truth!" She said with tears trailing down her face.

"Fine," He said. "I am." He let out a breath of relaxation. For some reason he felt a lot better after telling her. Hermione stared at him.

"With what?" She asked.

He stood there, silent. He had broken his promise to himself. He promised himself over and over that he would not tell Hermione. He stared at her with the thought of wondering if he should be mad at her. She had corrupted his personal feelings. She was snooping into his life secrets. '_Yes'_, he thought, '_I_ _should_.'

"Not telling you." He said acidly.

"And why not?" She asked with her arms crossed.

"It's none of your consent. What I do with my life has nothing to do with you." He growled angrily at her. "Nothing you do will help, because you have been doing nothing but making it worse."

"I was afraid of that." She whispered to the floor as her eyes met her leather, black, buckled shoes.

"What? Afraid of killing me?" He asked. "Yeah, Hermione, I love you, but if you are going to act like this then I'm not sure if I can handle it. I'm sorry about your father, and I know you are under a lot of stress, but that is no reason to take it out on me." He hissed at her with madness.

"Wait, wait, wait!" She shouted. "Just because you are so upset doesn't mean that you have to be suicidal!" She said. "Is that what you want?" She asked as tears filled her eyes. "Do you honestly want to die?"

"I don't know." He said simply. "This world has nothing for me, and I have already done my duty of killing Voldemort." Harry hissed. "So what's left for me?" He asked and Hermione fell to her knees in tears.

"There was me," She cried. "There was me and you didn't care. You want to die and leave me to grieve for you. I love you Harry, and you did nothing for me to believe in myself. I spent all my years worrying about you, but I never faced my own feelings. I was behind you one hundred percent to make sure you never got hurt, but what have you done for me? Now you stand here, poised to kill yourself, and I know I can't stop you. For once will you listen to me?" She cried into her hands with helplessness.

"Hermione I," He stopped.

"No Harry." She said. "I tried to help, and you were right. I do nothing but make matters worse for myself. I have nothing to do, but sit here and cry over one small lie. You broke a promise to me, and I stood by your word. Then I lied to you without you even knowing, and now I'm just... just... I'm just completely fucked up!" She cried.

"Hermione, please." He said and knelt by her. "You have done nothing for me to treat you like this. You _have_ helped me, and I didn't mean the things I said. I'm sorry for hurting you Hermione." He said. She was at least happy that he hadn't caught her outburst about the lie.

"Harry, I don't know what to do." She cried and before she knew it she seized him and cuddled close to him as the tears flowed down her cheeks. She wasn't sure of why she was doing this, but she did it.

"Shh, Hermione," Harry said gently. "Please don't cry." He pleaded, but Hermione hadn't settled down a bit.

"I hurt you, I've hurt my life, and I've killed my father." She cried. This was typical thing to all of those who've lost a parent. They immediately think it's their fault.

"Hermione," Harry sighed. "How many times do I have to tell you?" He asked and Hermione continued to sob. "It's not your fault!" He said. "It was an accident."

"Everything happens for a reason." She said and Harry looked at her with confusion. She sighed.

"Where have you heard that?" He asked and Hermione sighed again.

"I use to go to church, but I stopped. The bible states that all magic is evil, so if I returned then that would be dishonorable." She said with sadness. "I do miss my praying days, but I can't anymore." She said. "God said that everything happens for a reason. Giving magic is a punishment in the bible, and I must have done something wrong to become a mudblood." She shouted at herself and Harry went completely speechless.

"What?" He asked in outrage.

"The Slytherins are right..." She sighed. "I'm nothing but a mudblood."

She had called herself the word that all muggleborns hated the most. Hermione had spent her years defending for herself when someone called her that. She was giving up now, and it made no sense. She took all her hard work on proving she was just as good as everyone else, and threw it out the window. What was she thinking to make her do this to herself?

She was insulting herself for no reason at all. Harry knew he wouldn't take anymore of this, but before he knew it she had stood from his lap and wiped her eyes with the sleeve of her shirt. She felt her heart rip again, and the pain had returned to her. What was she doing?

"What are you doing?" Harry asked.

"Planning something." She said sadly and went to walk for the door.

"Wait," He said when he grabbed her wrist.

She didn't want to hear another word of what he said. She wanted to leave. She, though, had followed his pull and returned back into his lap. She sighed and leaned against his chest as he wrapped his arms around her. He rocked her gently.

"Why did you call yourself that?" He asked and Hermione's mind went back to the word 'mudblood.'

"I am nothing but a muggle." She said. "I am destroying the magic world as we speak, and I can't do anything about it." She said.

"Hermione," Harry said. "Having magic is like a privilege." He spoke silently. "You are the most wonderful person, and you are even hurting me to know that you insult yourself like that." He said as he wiped a trailing tear from her eye.

"You, though," She said. "You cut yourself. That hurt me." She said and Harry nodded in surrender.

"I know," He sighed sadly and hoped it wasn't true. "I'm sorry, but it seemed like the only way out at the time."

"Harry, I want you to promise me that you'll never-" Something had stopped her.

She felt the warm sensation as a pressure formed at her lips. The warm feeling had sent a shiver up her back as her lips interlocked with his. She felt herself sweat, but she had forced a kiss back to him. Her heart became whole again, and she no longer felt empty inside her. This is what made her free.

"Harry," She said as she took a breath. "Please?" She asked.

"I promise," Was all he could say.

Hermione had pushed back at him and their lips had locked again. Passion and hastily kisses formed and she felt her lips begin to bruise. She pulled away quickly to get a breath of clean air and sighed heavily. She laid her head against his chest once again with a smile.

"Just a question," Harry said as he panted lightly. "What were you planning?" The smile vanished from her lips.

"What?" She asked.

"Earlier you said you were planning something." Harry said and Hermione nodded. "Out of curiosity, what was it?" He asked. She took a deep breath and with a relaxing voice she spoke.

"My Death,"

* * *

**Author's Notes:**

**Alright, I'm not back to writing again. Aren't y'all happy? Probably not.Alright after reading this chapter I guess you wouldn't be happy, but I'd be happy if you reviewed! -wink wink-**

**The sixth book was really good, but the 4th book still remains my favorite. I can't believe he died though! I'm not saying a name because there are, amazingly, some out there who still haven't read the book. So I wish not to spoil it for them! Well I hope you enjoy this chapter and... HAPPY 16th BIRTHDAY DANIEL RADCLIFFE!**

**To My Reviewers:**

**missradcliffe – I hope you enjoyed the show. It sounds really cool, but I thought the book was really good too. Sad, but good!**

**FroBoy – Thanks.**

**Caitlyn – ALRIGHT! Lol, a little persuasive aren't you? Lol.**

**NeonNights – The end was Hermione's dream and in later chapters you find why he was abused, but for now it remains a mystery!**

**sakura-sweeti – You'll have to excuse the spelling errors. It's my program that changes spelling mistake for me and I sometimes can't find them. The program sometimes puts a completely different word or something else in its place so that spell check doesn't detect it. Apologies but enjoy!**

**toga party! – Your story sounds really good, and I encourage you to take a shot at writing it... as long as I get to read it! Lol. I was debating whether or not I should post this because you said you were going insane, but I think you've waited long enough! Lol, ENJOY!**

**Maren L P – Did you read the book? I got mine late and I was terribly pissed off, but thankfully I got it at some point. And don't you hate cliffhangers? Muhahaha.**

**GoldenWiings325 – One simple word can mean so much... thank you.**

**Heownesmysoulforever – Something tells me you wrote that review in like ten seconds. Lol, sometimes I can just tell. But thanks anyways. I'm glad you liked it and the wait is over, but I think I might wait a couple MONTHS before I post the next chapter... just kidding. **

**Thanks to all!**

**Airalynn**

**UPDATED: (SATURDAY) JULY 23, 2005 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY DANIEL! AGAIN!**


	4. Chapter Four: Knives

**Chapter Four:**

**Knives**

Hermione sat there in the lap of a stunned Harry. Why she had said it, she didn't know. Why she had revealed it, she would never know. This whole thing was driving her crazy, and this whole thing was burning through her like acid. She didn't dare to look at him, but she was just as stunned as he was. She had no idea what she was thinking, but she had spoke the words.

The sun was beginning to rise, and they had not said a word to each other. When Hermione finally got the strength to move, she did. She left him alone while he drowned in his thoughts. She was bathing in her own pool of confusion as she continued her way downstairs. She walked down each creaky step with a different tone of sighs on each single step.

It was quiet in the Burrow at dawn. Only the sound of clinking pans could be heard from the kitchens. Mrs. Weasley had set each pan with magic as they cleaned themselves of waste. Everything was the different here, compared to back home. Nothing would ever be the same here. She could see images of home, but she wasn't positive if she'd be strong enough to return.

Hermione had entered the kitchen. She opened the two sided window and a gust of lighted wind had slipped through. It took her by full power and she let out a heavily sigh of the morning. She loved the smell of morning dew that rested on the grounds. She knew that smell even from home, but she couldn't exactly feel like home.

She turned and walked to the small island in the center of the kitchen. Everything looked clean and each utensil looked polished. She glided her fingers softly about the counter top and sighed again. It made her think of home, but even the touch couldn't remind her of it now. She secretly wanted to go home, but she wasn't sure if she could face her mother in a time like this.

Maybe she was wrong to neglect her mother when she had lost the most important thing to her. Her father was a man of his word, but her mother seemed to see past all of that and didn't care for trust. Somewhere Hermione felt that she didn't belong in the family anymore, but she technically doesn't even have a family any more. Even her heart begun to feel empty because of this thought.

It's not that she didn't love her father. It's not that she didn't love her father, and it's not because she thought it was her fault. She didn't want to return, because she couldn't bear to see her mother in tears. Not now, not ever. She just couldn't. She didn't feel like it was right to leave home and return just because her father died, but there it was right in front of her and she turned her back on it.

Her father was dead. He had died in a car crash, and she could do nothing to save his life from ending. He was gone, and he would not come back. She could never speak to him again, and she would never be able to see his face again. She wasn't sure if she could ever live again. Hiding from everything in the world that faced her wasn't living, it was coward ness. She was nothing but a coward for turning her back on the few things that she ever loved.

Her head had hit the table with a thump, but she claimed to herself that pain was the least of her problems. It didn't matter to her if she was hurt, it only mattered if the ones she loved were alright. She had left Harry without a word and the mistake of saying something that meant something to her, but probably meant something completely different to him. She hadn't meant to say she was planning death, because that wasn't it at all. She knew the word, she just couldn't think of it.

Maybe she hadn't meant it, but she had most definitely said it. Harry probably thought she meant it, but she told herself countless times that she didn't. She had told herself countless times that she was the reason for her father's death, but Harry had told her it wasn't anything to do with her. Maybe it wasn't, but the thought had stung her eyes with crystal clear tears. She wanted to run away and never return to this world.

She didn't want to lift her head as it rested against the wood top of the kitchen island. The tools were rested neatly around it, and her eye caught nothing but a knife. Everything rushed through her mind, did she dare do it? Did she dare take that knife and do the unthinkable? Maybe she did mean her death. Maybe she was lying to herself and really did mean death.

The shining blade was tempting her with a large amount of force. She could imagine herself gripping it, but she couldn't. She stared at the black, leather handle with desire and then she did it. She picked up her palm and reached for it. In a slow motion her tears fell down her cheeks. She went to grasp it. Her fingers hadn't even grazed the handle when suddenly she jumped.

"What are you doing?" A voice said from the hall.

Hermione had thought she jumped over two feet, but that was an exaggeration. She looked up and wiped the tears from her eyes almost instantly. She saw him and she was speechless. She couldn't talk. It felt like a snowball was stuck in her throat and it wasn't able to melt. She gulped loudly as the man had walked closer to her. She had no idea what to say to him.

"Well?" He asked.

"Nothing," She whispered.

She tore her eyes away and looked at the man with pleading eyes. They were filled with sadness as she felt the prick of his eyes on her. She felt a shiver go down her side. She began to tremble lightly. She couldn't look at him and her heart felt it was beating faster then a hummingbird's wings could flap. She covered her mouth to muffle her sound and noticed his eyes weren't filled with sorrow or sadness. They were filled with anger and she had gasped.

"What were you doing?" He demanded.

"Nothing." Hermione stated and he shook his head.

"Damn it Hermione!" He shouted.

Hermione let out a scream as she watched him shove the knife onto the floor. She watched it spin off the table and onto the floor. It made a few swishes of the blade and it stopped. She noticed the end ending up pointing directly at her. Was this a sign? It pointed to her, but she couldn't hear its voice. She looked back to him with fear in her eyes.

"Harry stop it!" Hermione screamed unexpectedly. Harry had turned a glare on her.

"You told me not to lie, and you made me promise you not to do this!" Harry spat at her with anger. "I expected you to do the same!" He said.

"I wasn't going to do anything." She had whispered and Harry growled at her.

He turned and took a bowl from the rack. He had slammed it on the floor and Hermione had screamed once again. The cement pieces shattered and grinded into a grayish sand color. Hermione looked up at him as his rage soon increased. How could she stop him from destroying everything? She wasn't going to do this, honestly. Why wouldn't he listen?

Hermione watched his foot slam into the ceramic dust and a tiny gust of dust had been released to air. She looked at him with fear as she stood from the stool and stared at him with fear. She never knew she could be afraid of him, so why was she afraid? Why was she afraid to even look at him?

"Don't lie to me Hermione!" He said through clenched teeth.

"Harry, please, stop this!" She pleaded. "I wasn't planning anything, I swear." She cried with trepidation.

"You ordered me to stop it too, so you stab me in the back by doing it yourself." He growled at her. "You were planning on cutting _yourself_ weren't you?" He said with fear.

"No, Harry… never." She pleaded.

She backed up into a glass rack and each exploded from behind her. She had screamed with each shatter and felt a piece graze her neck. It hadn't cut it, but it felt like a small sting of a bee. Sometimes even small things can hurt more then you'd imagine they would.

"Stop lying to me Hermione!" He said as a wave of rage flooded her. She back away and felt her hips crash into the counter.

"I'm not lying to you!" She swore and her chocolate eyes blended with tears. Her eyes instantly became glossy and she gasped.

She had tried to run for it, but it was no use. He had grabbed her wrist and made her fall to the floor. She had curled into a small ball as his grasp tightened. They felt like iron snakes wrapped around her wrist in a knot. She gasped with pain as her voice was gone from shock. She screamed under her breath.

"Let go of me!" She pleaded.

"Did you think about it?" He asked with clenched teeth. She could hear the sharp cord of a note as his teeth scraped with other ones.

"No!" She screamed. "Why won't you believe me? What has gotten into you?" She asked with a face of a scared child.

"I don't know." He said, but what gave Hermione the chills is that he had said it in a relaxed tone.

Hermione breathed gently as she was released from him. Blood trickled down the side of her arm where his nail had dug into her skin. She wasn't sure if he really did mean what he was doing, but she knew that this wasn't who she remembered. This was not the man she loved, and this was not the one she swore to that she'd give nothing but pure honesty to him.

"I'm sorry Hermione, but you… it's just that…" He had trailed off without meaning to and she had only noticed the last few words: "I didn't mean it." He said.

"Usually I'm not a forgiven person." She said with coldness in her voice. He had nodded and had got the conclusion that she wouldn't forgive him.

"I'd understand if you didn't forgive me." He said in surrender. He had pointed his wand at her wrist and the bruising had instantly disappeared. Hermione tried to smile, but she couldn't bring herself into doing so. "I didn't mean it. All this stuff has just drove me crazy over the past few days. I can't control my emotions as easily as before." He had knelt down in front of her.

She had wiped the tears from her eyes. She had just realized that she could not blame this on him. She hadn't even imagined what had happened over the summer, and she felt that he had done nothing but desired revenge. Growing up for a full summer and getting treated like that… no wonder he was such a mess. She couldn't blame him for something like this. She couldn't blame his for having these feelings and getting confused.

"I understand," She had spoken in a soft tone. "You were confused with your thoughts and reality." She said.

"Not entirely." He said and Hermione had fixed him a confused look.

"Is there more?" She asked.

"I thought…" Harry started. "Well, I have no idea what happened, but please do not judge me for this." He said. Hermione had nodded in agreement. "I thought I had seen my Aunt in you." He said.

"How is that?" She asked, rather offended.

"Every morning I would come down when breakfast would call. She would always be sitting by the counter with her head in her arms crying because of Dudley's weight. Then when she would see me she would try and grab everything in sight and stash it away." He said and Hermione sighed.

"Then you saw me." She said. He nodded.

"I didn't mean to scare you, and I honestly didn't mean to hurt you. It just came back to me and I couldn't control myself." He said. "I couldn't stop myself from letting this happen, and I was shocked about this morning."

"What were you shocked about?" She had asked.

She thought of nothing at that precise moment. Nothing came to her mind that would make Harry shocked. She couldn't think of any, but when he said something everything came back to her. Every mood, every color, and every image had returned to her head. She wasn't sure if she could hold onto this news, but she clutched her teeth and hoped to answer him.

"You said you were planning your death." He said. "You have no idea what that meant to me." He said.

"You jump, I jump." She said and Harry sighed.

"You don't honestly mean that Hermione. After everything and after _this?_" He asked and she nodded.

"It doesn't matter what you do," She said. "I'll love you forever."

* * *

They had spent that morning cleaning, and they had no clue on how Mrs. Weasley had no heard one thing. Harry was pacing in his bedroom without a word. He had no idea why what happened downstairs happened. His mind was a little fuzzy and he had not meant to create anything down stairs. The last thing he ever wanted to do was hurt Hermione, and he had done it.

He didn't know how to erase the past. He couldn't just put her under a spell and act like it never happened. It did happen, and he couldn't change that. His mind was still racing with thoughts of what was going on, but he didn't understand how she could still love him after he had harmed her. He didn't even forgive himself, so why exactly did she forgive?

He had no idea or no thought about her except thinking that she was completely insane about her tactics. He couldn't love her forever without knowing that this might happen again. He loved her now, but he didn't want to hurt her. That's how all breakups started, but he couldn't let her go now. He couldn't let her leave him, because he was nothing without her.

Without thinking he had sat on his bed hardly and brought his wand to meet the door. He cast a spell on it and it shut tight. It was so no one walked in on him in the middle of doing this. No more time would be waste with thoughts of the past, and no longer would he live with the thought of ever harming her again. He had to make it up to her, but he had no idea how.

He let out a surge of pain when he had done something to himself. He batted away the soiling and stood from his seat. He covered it with a towel and slipped on a long sleeve shirt so it hid the towel. Without a word he had left the room and proceeded down stairs and almost instantly came face to face with Mrs. Weasley. She had a smile on her face, clearly not knowing anything, and patted his shoulder.

"Glad to see your feeling better." She smiled.

"Thank you," He smiled. She had patted him once more on the shoulder and watched him move swiftly around her and into the kitchen.

"What is your hurry?" She asked as Harry had stuffed three pieces of toast into his mouth without word.

"Buiy neft fo foe ho iayon alie." He said through his stuffed mouth.

"Hold it," She said. "Calm down, swallow, and now what?" She asked.

"I need-" he started after her swallowed. "To go to Diagon Ally." He said and Mrs. Weasley looked floundered.

"Why on earth would you want to go there alone?" She asked. She looked flustered with confusion and he laughed.

"I need to pick up something," He said hastily. "For someone." He said and she nodded.

"Somehow I knew you and Hermione would get together." She said.

Harry had frozen right before he stepped into the fire place. How could she know? They had been hiding from the family ever since he arrived at the Burrow. How could she have known if she hadn't seen him? Was he missing something or did moms really know everything? He had laughed in his head, but turned with silence.

"How did you know?" He asked and Mrs. Weasley smiled.

"You rushing upstairs as soon as you got here and then I sent Hermione to check on you and she had not come back down." She said. "I kind of figured it out. That's not all though." She smiled.

"There's more?" He asked in shock and she smiled.

"I walked in on you two when you were asleep. I hadn't meant to, but I was looking for something and I thought I might have left it in that room when I was cleaning it today for you. I put the pieces together and I couldn't help but celebrate." She said.

"Ron wasn't too happy." A voice said from behind him. Harry looked and there stood Ginny.

"Why not?" He asked and Ginny let out a tired laugh.

"You honestly don't want me to answer that do you?" She asked and Harry shook his head.

"I suppose not."

* * *

**Author's Note: **

**A little shorter chapter this time, but for some reason I like it. Now, do not a critic on how Harry acted earlier in the chapter. It's going to tie into something in upcoming chapters, so please, do not be all like "I hate Harry" because you'll find later why he did what he did.**

**Until next time!**

**To My Reviewers:**

**PrincessLuckyCML – Harry might have kept his word, but he had an interesting way of doing it. Hope you enjoy!**

**Maren L P – That was my first intention. I figured it would be Sirius' brother, but knowing J.K it could be a new character. I cried at the end of the book 6 too, but that book is DEFINITELY not my favorite.**

**Mel – I'm sorry to hear that you cut yourself too. I'm sure there have been some real problems to make you do that, and I'm glad this story had hooked you. I doubt after this chapter you'll read it though, because I'm afraid I'm gonna lose reviewers because of this.**

**heownesmysoulforever – That is seriously creepy that you have a napkin from McDonald's with my story name written on it. I'd go run in the street if it didn't hurt so much, lol. I'm just joking, but that was a seriously funny review. You made me laugh my ass off at it… haha.**

**X Acheron X – NOT THE FLYING MONKIES!**

**toga party! – I saw the video clip thing, and that was seriously funny. I had no idea what was happening at first, but then I got it. I think the funniest part was when the baby was taking its first steps then fell down the stairs… hahaha. I am such a horrible person. :p **

**FireMoonGoddess – If she listened to us wouldn't that be like us writing the story and not her? I'm just pissed off that it was Ginny. For some reason I hate her character in the 6th book. She's always so fricken stuck up!**

**FroBoy – Alright? Lol.**

**missradcliffe – I admit I even got pissed off at him and I WROTE IT! Haha. What was up with sending me seven messages of the same message? Was that by accident or were you trying to annoy me? Lol.**

**boredaurorchick – You got to wait like a day, lol. Glad you like it and I can't wait for your next review!**

**Well that's it everyone. Thanx Y'all!**

**Airalynn**

**UPDATED: (SATURDAY) JULY 30 2005**

"**_You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you don't trust enough."_**


	5. Chapter Five: Unparalleled

**Chapter Five:**

**Unparalleled**

He was whisked away with blurs of colors all around him. He felt like a million of him was being dragged away from each other. There were a million places, but only one of him. He tried pulling one way, while a force had pulled him a different direction at one time. He felt himself split in two, and then he had finally gotten a hang of himself before he was all together.

His scrawny body had fallen face first to the floor without meaning to. He gathered himself to his feet and wiped the dust away. Never had this been so much trouble, but all of a sudden it had been. He felt thin and lanky, and he wasn't sure if he had enough body strength to get off the floor. He had eventually gotten up out of the dusty substance and faced the waiter of The Three Broomsticks.

The man had short blond hair and a grin on his face as if he was playing a cruel joke on a harmless human. Harry had faced the man as he dusted every last inch of soot off himself and looked at the man. He noticed the man's brownish eyes with puzzlement. He had never seen a _blond_ guy with brown eyes. Perhaps the man had dyed his hair?

"Hello," Harry had greeted, and the man stood there without an answer. "Hello?"

Harry had raised his hand and waved it in front of the man's face, but still no movement was seen. What was going on? Why had the after math of flooing to Hogsmeade change after six years? Was this a set up, and why wasn't this man moving or taking any notice that Harry was talking to him? Something was definitely strange, but Harry couldn't put his finger on it.

The man was as stiff as a board, and looked petrified pale. He had the feeling that the Dark Lord could be back, but that was impossible. Harry had defeated him, and he knew that Voldemort could no longer return. Could it be possible that someone was trying to avenge Voldemort's death? Oh, Merlin, perhaps this person was even stronger then the Dark Lord could have ever been.

Harry shrugged his shoulders and continued the way out of the Three Broomsticks and on through the deserted streets of Hogsmeade. Everything looked empty, and it didn't help that the trees had lost almost all of their leaves. Winter seemed to be coming quicker then Harry had imagined, but I guess there wasn't any reason to be worried about the early arrival of a stupid season.

Out of every season, winter was definitely his worse. Harry didn't like snow, and he some how hated being cold. He'd rather sweat to death, than freeze to death and others found this peculiar. Why they had thought this, he didn't know. The answer, though, to their choice was they didn't want to die at all. Go figure.

Harry had walked down the streets, but they had not been entirely empty. People were shuffling out of the new shop in Hogsmeade like no tomorrow. Congrats to Fred and George Weasley on their success of fulfilling their dreams to run a joke shop. They finally had Weasley's Wizarding Weezes in full business. As cheerful as Harry seemed, he still congratulated them every time they came into contact.

It wasn't very often, but Harry didn't have time to be lurking around joke shops when he had something else to take care of. He passed the small shops of Madame Mulkins and couldn't help himself but to press his face against the window. Small children were getting fitted for their robes and Harry sighed. No less then six years ago that was him, and in no less then a year he will never do it again.

He walked in without a thought in his head, but a memory had come back to him as soon as he stepped foot in. His Hogwart's list said that they would need dress robes this year, but Harry had no idea which to choose. They all looked the same, and they all looked rather hideous. He took the simplest one and paid for it. He thought maybe he could do something to fix it up himself.

He walked out of the store with a bag in hand. Inside the bag was his robe, but out side the bag was no one but Harry. It seemed weird that all of a sudden everyone vanished from sight. Two people were hastily shoving themselves into hiding places once they saw him. He blinked with perplexity and walked on. What had gotten into them? What had happened to the once friendly, quiet town of Hogsmeade?

Then it happened as awkward as ever. He had stepped foot into a small store and the lady at the desk had let out a loud, piercing, scream that Harry had to cover his ears because of it. When the lady had stopped she had turned a ghostly pail color as the peach drained from her bony cheeks. Harry looked surprised at the least, but why the hell would the lady scream? He twisted his eyebrows in a knot.

"Excuse me," He said.

"TAKE IT!" She wailed. "TAKE THE MONEY, JUST PLEASE, DON'T HURT ME!" She pleaded.

"I'm not here to rob you lady," He said with great astonish. "I'm here to buy from you." He said.

"I know who you are!" She said. Of course she knew, _every_ one knew. "You're that Potter kid who is here to kill us all. Now that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is gone, you have no one to stop you from taking over our world!"

"Lady, please," Harry said as a headache came to him. "I was merely saving the wizarding world, and do not believe everything you read in _The Daily Prophet_, because most of it is bad publicity."

"Oh? Bad publicity he says…" She mocked with a growl of dislike. "The Prophet happens to be more accurate then a witness would say." She said.

"Have you ever noticed that witnesses sometimes _lie_?" He asked and she looked down her nose with disgust.

"Traitor!" She growled. "You are a traitor to this world. The Dark Lord isn't gone, and I know. Being the cousin to Sybil Trelawney isn't worthless for everything."

"Now I understand." He rolled his eyes. "Look, I really don't have the time to fight over whether the crock Trelawney is a real seer or not. Just let me order what I need, and I'll be on my way." He said.

"No." She hissed. "You will first apologize for being disrespectful to my cousin and the rest of my family." She said.

"I will show you just as much respect as you have shown me… none. NOW, if you don't mind, I'd like to get on with my life!" He snipped back and she gulped.

"This is phenomenal!" She shrieked. "I will not help such a rude person as you." She glared with full anger in her eyes.

"Then I will do it." He said. "You claim me as a monster, then I'll be a monster for you lady." He threatened and for some reason she had backed away.

"What are you going to do?" She asked with a shaky voice.

"If you want your family to live, I suggest you let me purchase an item from this store." He said and she nodded.

She was scared, and he felt horrible for even threatening her. He felt bad, but he also felt that she deserved ever word. How dare she talk to him like that? He wasn't a monster, and he was just a normal boy. Well, alright, he wasn't _normal_. He had more strength and power then anyone understood, but the thing is: he needed to learn how to control it, instead of it controlling him.

All it ever did was bring more problems to each of the worlds without meaning at all towards him. This made him seem kind of insensitive, but that wasn't it at all. Harry was an odd wizard, and somewhat he wished he wasn't even himself. Never was there a day that he was happy for himself or congratulated himself on something he succeeded in over time. Even when he killed Voldemort, he was far from happy.

He didn't know what is was that made him feel upset inside, but he couldn't really explain it. He couldn't do anything, and he really didn't have the time to be thinking about these things. He had to get back to the burrow, and he needed to prove to Hermione that he was sorry. He was crossed between eight different thoughts by the time he even got to The Three Broomsticks.

Everyone had suddenly stared at him in pure fear, but Harry was actually afraid of them and what they'd do to him if he got too close. Would they attack him for getting to close to a child maybe? Why were people treating him like he _was_ Tom Riddle and not really Harry. What happened to being Harry Potter, the one who could save the world? Well, he had saved it, and were they not grateful?

He practically saved their lives, and they treated him like he wasn't suitable to live his life for what it was worth. Did they _want_ to die? In a way, though, he actually sacrificed their lives. If he hadn't killed Voldemort and Harry had died instead, then the world would have no sooner been under the Dark Lord's full control. Never would Harry have let that happen, but somehow it sort of counted as risking everyone's lives.

If they had felt offended for the way Harry played through the battle, then he found himself completely guilty. Maybe people took this harder then others. Maybe they thought it was a trick to get Harry to become stronger and then claim Voldemort had died. That, though, was completely impossible. Why would they think that when they had heard the real story?

What confused Harry was why would he, if he was a Dark Lord, be walking around Hogsmeade like it was nothing? Normally someone like that would be hiding and attacking when no one noticed. Did they honestly think he would walk around like this if he was planning a death? He wanted, so badly, to tell them all to just grow up, and think logically. Logic might not be good enough to solve everything, but this topic was pretty pathetic.

Nothing seemed the same, but would it be this bad or even worse if Voldemort happened to still be alive? Would the fate of the Magic World still be in jeopardy? Would the muggles still be known to wizards as outsiders? What would happen if Harry himself returned to being muggle? People ignored him and treated him as a normal boy when he lived with the Dursley's, but never again would he even step foot to return into that household.

Harry stepped into the portal and as soon as he was whisked away, he felt rather comfortable for being away from Hogsmeade. He was pulled toward a swirling mist of blue and green and then it hit him. He felt sort of weak once again, but better than the first time. He walked out and was met with a crying Mrs. Weasley. Harry gave her a look of utter puzzlement, but soon she spoke to him.

"Are you ready," She said. "To tell me what's going on?" She asked and Harry had let out a silent gulp.

"What do you mean?" He asked as he tried running around the point that she was trying to make.

"You know Harry," She said. "I saw your clothes." She wiped a tear from her eye.

"M- My clothes?" He asked in a questioning tone.

"Yes, Harry," She said. "They were lying on the floor when I went to check on Hermione. She is taking a nap, and then I saw them." She crossed her arms and Harry began to look slightly nervous.

"Well," He said. "I'd imagine they'd be there because I left them there." He looked slightly scared too.

"Harry!" She hissed. "Why did you come with bruises, scars, cuts, and even bloodstained clothes?" She said in the open.

"It was nothing Mrs. Weasley," He assured. "It's not what it looks like." He said.

"What happened to you?" She asked. "Explain, and don't seem so nervous because I already know half of it." She said.

"_Half_ of it?" He asked.

"Yes." She said. "You told Ron he could tell me, and he gave me half of it. I don't want to know about how your uncle treats you," She said. "I want to know why you hadn't warned us." She was still crying.

"Oh," he said with relaxation. "Well, it wasn't really my fault. I was sort of crossed between thoughts and I was going to send it the one night, but then he found out and threatens to kill Hedwig. Then when I sent the letter after Ron said he was coming to pick me up I got beaten that night. I sort of got knocked out after one crack of the whip, but I honestly didn't mean to offend you if I did."

"Not at all," She said and he could help but detect that she had formed a new pound of freshly cried tears.

"Mrs. Weasley," He said in sympathy. "Please don't cry any more. I'm fine, and you have no reason to be crying because of what happens to me." He said and she looked flabbergasted.

"Harry, you are like a son to me." She said and Harry look to the floor. "I couldn't forgive myself if anything had happened to you."

Harry went to say something, but he was pulled into a bone crushing, lovable hug and had no way of movement. She was hugging him a little too tight, but he hadn't minded at all. He could smell her tears, and like he had once told Hermione, he hated seeing others in pain because of him. It was his fault that Hermione's wrist was almost broken. It was _his_ fault that Mrs. Weasley was crying out to the gods. Possibly she was praying for help to get through this.

"Please," Harry said. "You don't have to worry, because everything will soon be alright, and there will no longer be any reason to be scared." He said. Harry had hugged her back and held her with as much force.

He needed to save anyone who might have problems. She was crying because of him, and he needed to fix that for good. He needed to make everyone feel safe and everyone needed to feel comfortable. No one should feel scared, and Harry was beginning to believe that the Weasleys, and Hermione, were the only ones who knew that Harry wasn't dangerous at all.

"Mrs. Weasley," Harry started when she hadn't said anything. "Can I ask you a question?" He wondered.

"Yes," she said. She pulled away and whipped the tears away again. "Of course, dear." she said.

"Why were people acting so strangely when I was in Hogsmeade today?" He asked and Mrs. Weasley had let out a sigh.

"Why they found you a threat?" She asked.

"Yes!" Harry said. "You know what's going on then? Could you please explain it all to me? I'm seriously lost."

"I can't," She said and Harry looked confused. "But I might know something that can help you." She said.

"Some_thing_?" He asked in puzzlement.

"Here," she said.

Harry had taken something from her hand. It was a rolled up, crimpled, old, and it was last month's version of _The Daily Prophet._ Harry unfolded it, unrolled it, and stared at it with unbelief. After he thought Rita Skeeter was the worse, he was wrong... very wrong to not suspect someone else. Someone else, though, was now a new threat to Harry and possibly everyone else.

_Harry Potter Revealed_

_Yesterday, our young hero had officially killed the enemy to our world: Lord Voldemort, or Tom Riddle. He is no longer a threat, but we now have a new one. Even if our long lost enemy is gone, we didn't know that another one was forming in the body we once believed was a Hero. Harry Potter has proved himself to be the strongest of all wizards when he was younger. The Dark Lord had left him with a scar and part of his own powers. When young Potter began to grow, he had suddenly started mastering the power that he had. Little did he know that he could defeat the strongest wizard in the world, but he has proved it? Could it be possible that this is a scam and a training technique for his later years? Maybe he is actually the new Dark Lord._

_We have visited the old Headmaster from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry in the heart of London. Albus Dumbledore has watched Potter grow from the one year old he was when his parents died, to the sixteen year old self that he remains today. Knowing that Potter's birthday is tomorrow, recent research has proved to us that Tom Riddle, Voldemort, had decided to become the Dark Lord at sixteen himself. Whether Potter will follow Voldemort and be the new he-who-must-not-be-named is entirely unpredictable, but Dumbledore assures us that he is one of the most generous and sweetest students at the school. Is this possibly an act?_

_Dumbledore noted in an interview yesterday that Potter has received over several rewards at Hogwarts School for his deeds. Clearly amazing it might seem, but Tom Riddle himself happened to be exactly like Potter when he was sixteen. Riddle was a quite and a big puzzle-solver when he was in his school days. We all have heard the story that a miscalculation had occurred and caused Harry Potter to live instead of die at the age of one year. Is this a trap and is Harry Potter really Voldemort's ally? Until next time, I'm Samantha Collens, special correspondent. Hope you're having a happy summer!_

"I don't understand." Harry said when he had finished reading.

"Yes," Mrs. Weasley said. "It does seem rather difficult to believe, but it's there in ink and can not be erased." She said.

"You don't honestly believe this... do you?" Harry asked.

"I believe only what I feel I should." And with that, she had disappeared into the kitchen.

Harry read it again and again until his eyes had begun to hurt. All this stuff that this Samantha girl wrote didn't make any sense. Harry didn't believe any of this stuff, and he only killed Voldemort because he was set with that task. Dumbledore told him that in the end he or Voldemort had to die to cease the fighting, but maybe he was actually supposed to die and not Voldemort. Maybe this was all a mistake.

"I see Molly had let you see it." A voice said from the hall. Harry looked up and there stood Mr. Weasley with a straight face.

"You work at the Ministry, do you know why they are writing stuff about me like I'm a monster?" He asked and Mr. Weasley shook his head.

"I don't know what goes on in that station, Harry." He said. "But you have more problems to worry about." He said and Harry looked up.

"More?" Harry asked. "What could possibly be bigger than this?" He asked and Mr. Weasley sighed.

"The minister, well," He said. "He's making a decision."

"Is it about me?" Harry asked and he nodded.

"They're trying to make the decision of sending you somewhere." He said.

"Where? Away from London?" Harry asked. "But what about Hogwarts?"

"Well, you wouldn't be aloud back, and yes, away from London." He said and Harry looked amazed.

"But," Harry started. "I haven't done anything, so why would they send me away?" He asked. "Is it another school?"

"No, it's far from any form of school." Mr. Weasley said.

"Is it another country?" Harry asked. "Possibly a different city?"

"It's a different city, but the same country." He said and Harry looked confused.

"What would they send me to if it's not a school?" He asked and Mr. Weasley had heaved a great sigh.

"There thinking about shipping you to Azkaban in the fall." He said.

"PRISON?" Harry asked in outrage. He had jumped to his feet. "I'm being arrested?" He asked and Mr. Weasley shrugged.

"They are debating it, but it's possible that you would be sent there." He said and Harry covered his face in his hands.

"What would be my charges?" Harry asked.

"Well, there would be three." Mr. Weasley said. "That's all I know of."

"Which are?" Harry asked. He was sweating with anticipation.

"One would be the attempt of killing a muggle, what you did to your uncle this summer." He said.

"I'm guilty of that." Harry mumbled.

"Second for insulting the owner of a Jewelry store this afternoon." Harry sighed at Mr. Weasley's news.

"I'm guilty of that too." He said and Mr. Weasley looked amazed. "Don't ask." Harry said.

"Then last," He said. "And this is the biggest. This is the reason why they were even considering it." He said.

"Alright, why?" Harry asked hastily.

"They want to charge you," Mr. Weasley sighed. "With the murder of Tom Marvolo Riddle."

**Author's Notes:**

**Alright everyone I update... ARE YOU HAPPY? Lol. Sorry I hadn't updated last week, but I was on a camping trip from Wednesday to Sunday, so I had barely any time to write. Sorry for the delay everyone and I hope you enjoy this chappie! Until next time!**

**Airalynn**

**To My Reviewers:**

**LoveSick105 – **Dude, Connie, how many names do you have? Lol. Well Harry kinda scared me too, and I wrote it... how pathetic is that? I miss Oswald. –sigh-

**toga party! – **Sorry to you about the delay, and I felt bad that you wanted this chapter so much. I could have posted on Sunday, but it wasn't finished so you had to wait another week, sorry again. Good luck with your book and hope you like!

**call me brit – **Poor Ron? Lol, It's always him... haha.

**DraginPhlie – **I? What do you mean by those reviews when all you say is "I?"

**boredaurorchick – **I leave you wanting more? God I love this power that I had no idea I had, lol. Maybe I should wait a YEAR before my next chapter, would you go crazy? Just kidding.

**FroBoy – **Thank you.

**Maren L.P – **It was most definitely not my favorite book. I think my favorite is either 4th or 5th, but I like the 4th A LOT! I've read it like 80 times. Wasn't his outburst a cool twist to the story though? I thought so.

**Nicole13-1991 – **Nope, I finished the 6th book two days after I received it. I got it the Tuesday after it was released and then finished it that Thursday, so I might be missing parts as I crammed it all into my mind, lol. I'll gladly put the book down and write, because I already read it! Hahaha. Well, sorry again about the delay, but I don't exactly have a lap top.

**That's it. Thanks to everyone who reviewed! Have a good Weekend! I also might only be updating every other week, because I have a job starting today (Saturday the 13th) and it's going to take a lot out of my writing system. Thanks guys! My first day at work... I'm nervous:(**

**UPDATED: (SATURDAY) AUGUST 13, 2005 **

"**_Creativity arises out of the tension between spontaneity and limitations, the latter (like the river banks) forcing the spontaneity into the various forms which are essential to the work of art or poem."_**


	6. Chapter Six: Betrayal Of Broken Promises

**Chapter Six:**

**Betrayal of Broken Promises**

Harry watched as the words escaped the lips of Mr. Weasley. It was like a line of notes trailed from his mouth and into Harry's ears as quick as a bullet. His heart felt like it was in his throat. He was completely speechless, and was nearly slapping himself in hopes that this was just a dream. Only one thought trailed through his mind, and that was the thought of nothing. He was as blank as a fresh cut piece of paper.

Damn the ministry, and damn _The Daily Prophet_, but it meant more than it did to just cuss at them. He needed to do something, something more, or something horrid. He needed to get back at them, and he had nothing in mind but the red hot pulse of revenge boil in his veins. He would make them pay, but information would be better to know then attacking right away.

"What?" He shouted. "I WAS PULLED INTO THIS BECAUSE I LIVED! I WAS TOLD TO DESTROY HIM, AND I DID! THEY WANT TO SEND ME AWAY AND ROT IN A WET, DISGUSTING CELL FOR SAVING THE WORLD?"

"I know," Mr. Weasley said in a hushed tone. "I understand what you're going through, but you have to understand that it's not _my_ decision." He said.

"I KNOW ITS NOT, BUT CAN'T YOU SAY ANYTHING?" Harry pleaded. "YOU HAVE NO CLUE WHAT I'M GOING THROUGH!"

"Harry, what I say is a tiny sub side of meaning. They'd turn me away as soon as walked through the door!" He said. "I am in a too small of department to do anything big." He tried to say in a reasonable voice.

The heat in the room seemed to be growing at an outstandingly fast rate. The fury was flying, and the sparks between the two were zapping like lightning. Harry felt like killing himself at the speed of sound, but he stood there and stared at the one man he thought would stick up for him. It seemed rather selfish of Harry to ask Arthur to do so much, but there wasn't another option at the moment.

"What's all this yelling about!" An upset Mrs. Weasley asked as she entered the room with Hermione on her tail.

"Is something wrong?" Hermione asked in a light voice. "Harry?" She wondered.

Harry's heart felt consistently lighter at the sound of her voice. Hermione was stiffly walking towards him, and he still stood, prompt on his feet, and glaring at Mr. Weasley with all his might. His eyes then returned to the softness it usually was when he felt her touch upon his arm. He turned at the waist and set an arm around her back, pulling her into a hug.

"What's going on?" Hermione asked.

She was pulled into the loving hug. Somewhere inside Hermione she felt like something was going to separate them, but she couldn't exactly place it. She couldn't place where this vibe was coming from, but it felt like it was being absorbed through Harry's skin and into her own blood. She felt the shiver up her spine and the pressure of fear travel through her body.

"I'm leaving," Harry said. "Sometime in September I guess." Harry said sadly.

"That's when your trial is." Arthur said with a gentle voice.

"_Trial?_" Hermione said in an outstanding voice. "What have you done, Harry?" She wondered. "Where are you leaving to?" She asked.

"Azkaban," He said. "I'm going to prison."

"No!" Hermione said in a reinforcing voice. "You're not leaving! You can't, because you've done nothing wrong!" She cried.

"Yes," He said. "I have."

Harry thought it was awkward with the silence from the Weasley parents. They just stood there like nothing, but when Harry had said the word, their mouths dropped. Mrs. Weasley's eyes had become filled with deep, crystal clear tears that trailed down her eyes, but what hurt worse was Hermione's. The shiny substance had covered her beautiful chocolate eyes, and now they pierced Harry like a knife being plunged into his heart.

"What?" Hermione asked.

"I murdered someone, and now…" He took a deep breath. "I have to pay the price."

Harry lifted his head high, so his chin was parallel with the floor. Hermione's face had an expression of confusion on it when he had kissed her cheek and walked for the stairs. What he was going to do, he had no idea. He didn't know how to get out of this mess, so instead of getting out he'd face it. He'd been running his entire life, and now he needed to take one for the team. He was going to give in.

He had no choice but to possibly leave Hermione behind and face his fears. He wanted her to do nothing but live her life happily and completely free. If he was the reason why she was being held back in chains, then that would be the reason why he would go. Maybe Ron would no longer need to be jealous of him and Hermione, but savagely, Harry wanted to think he was suffering with the thought.

Harry wanted to do nothing but run away. He was confused on how this all happened and why it happened. It was like he was being punished for being punished. It didn't make sense. Harry had paid the consequences at home, but he couldn't sit back and let them take away his one chance of living a happy life. He needed to fight, but more than anything else… he needed to win one last battle.

They had put him up to this and he would have given anything to back out of it. All the years of fighting and all the years of nearly dying had done nothing but cost him a free ticket into prison. Harry would now understand what happened to his long lost godfather, Sirius, and find out what exactly happened. Maybe it would be peaceful there, so he could rot in peace.

Harry was about to head for the stairs. He was waiting for that loud creak from the bottom step, but something had pulled him back. A small hand had lay firmly across his broad shoulder and pulled back with so much force, that it hurt. Harry spun around and faced the one person that he thought would understand this decision that he needed to make: Hermione.

"We need to talk." She said.

She tapped her foot on the floor strongly, reminding him of an aggravated duckling who needs a nap, but kept his mouth shut. Hermione stood there with pain, love, but most of all, disappointment in her eyes. Her eyes were filled with tears, and all Harry could do was sigh his thoughts away. He just stared at her like a strong, responsible man, but inside was something much deeper…

"We have nothing to talk about." He said in a small voice.

"Yes, Harry," She said with hurt in her voice. "We do."

She entwined her fingers in his and pulled him up the stairs. He was lost on where he was going because she was pulling so fast. He guessed he missed about ten steps out of the twenty, and stumbled on at least five. Hermione had yanked him into an empty room with a spark of rage in her and he stumbled to a corner. He sat, with his head still high, and with no thought in his head.

"Alright," Hermione said. "It's your turn to feel scared." She said.

"What are you talking about?" He wondered.

"This past week, if you haven't noticed, I've acted differently around you. Not with the whole loving thing, because I really do love you more than words it self… but it's difficult." She said. "I haven't been as open to you as usual, because for once in my life I was afraid of you." She said.

"I don't-" He was cut off.

"Listen, Harry," She said. "I've noticed something, and the incident downstairs was one of them. You make a stupid choice and then you act like you are a gentleman." She said, pacing the room. "You are nothing but a scared little boy impersonating a seventeen year old." She crossed her arms.

"Scared?" Harry asked with a laugh in his throat. "I just put up enough courage to save not only my life, but yours too!" He said with his temper rising.

"That's not what I mean and you know it Harry!" She protested. "You know that I am grateful that you put your life on the line for us, but you can't be mad at Mr. Weasley." She said in truth.

"It doesn't matter who or what I'm mad at, it doesn't change the fact that I have a trial and being shipped to Azkaban!" He growled.

"That's it, Harry," She said with a reassuring smile. "You have a _trail_, and it hasn't been decided yet."

"Hermione," Harry sighed. "Since when has the Ministry been on our side?" He asked and crossed his arms to mock her in her defeat.

"Well," She said. "I… There was… Well… Oh, there just has to be something they've done for you!" She stammered.

"Just face it Hermione!" He said. "They're not on my side!"

"No, Harry, I won't face it." She said with her head held high. "I believe that they can change over the years, and maybe they were put up to it by someone, and then they change at the last minute." She insisted.

"Hermione," Harry said. "That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard."

Hermione's mouth dropped with outstanding rage of being offended. She gawked at him as her face came to a rosy red color and Harry swore he could see the steam flow out her ears. He just crossed his arms with the love of his stupidity and stared at her, and basically waiting for her to say something. She didn't need to say anything, because her face had said at all.

"Are you insulting me?" She asked as her teeth clenched together like they were glued there by mistake.

"Oh, no," He said in a sarcastic tone. "I would _never_ mock Hermione Granger." He started skipping around the room.

"FINE!" She growled and he had suddenly stopped.

"What?" He asked. A sign of perplexity placed on his lips in the process.

"I HOPE YOU GO TO AZKABAN!" She shouted. "I HOPE YOU'RE IN A DARK CELL WITH NO ONE ELSE WHILE YOU ROT YOUR LIFE AWAY. I DON'T NEED YOU HERE, AND I NEVER WILL. I LIVED MOST OF MY LIFE NOT LOVING YOU, AND I CAN GO LONGER. I AM NOT GOING TO SIT HERE WAITING FOR YOUR FOOLISH ASS TO COME TO YOUR SENSES. I ONCE BELIEVED YOU GREW UP, BUT I WAS WRONG. YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A CHILD, YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A COWARD, AND YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A LIAR. YOU WILL BE SORRY WHEN YOU ARE CHAINED UP TO A WALL IN AZKABAN, BECAUSE THEN YOU'LL REALLY KNOW WHY SIRIUS WAS THE WAY HE WAS. DO NOT COME BACK HERE EXPECTING ME TO BE A FRIEND, BECAUSE I WON'T BE HERE TO ROT MY LIFE AWAY TOO JUST CARING ABOUT YOU. I HATE YOU HARRY POTTER, AND I ALWAYS WILL!" She had pushed at him. "I HATE YOU!"

Harry noticed as he was pushed to the floor that he had made her cry. Her eyes were drowned out by tears that she couldn't bear to hold back. She let them run freely out her eyes and a look of madness in her once angelic face. She had once said the words 'I love you' and now she turned them completely around. For some reason, a bad pain was in his heart that he didn't know could happen. She had turned all her love into hate in less then a half an hour.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, but Hermione didn't back down.

"You aren't sorry!" She yelled. "You're only saying that because I said I hated you. When term comes around you won't be so scared. You are to stay away from me, and that's forever. I seriously mean it, Potter, you'll be warned." She growled.

"News flash, I'm not going back to school." He said in a low tone.

"GOOD! It makes it a hell of a lot easier for me!" With that said, she had left the room at a high speed.

He had felt the pain it showed when someone had lost a loved one, but for some reason this was harder than ever. Harry had never loved someone and end up having someone love him in return, but then he found that one person that had actually made him happy again. He let her slip through his fingers, and it was his fault they were fighting in the first place. What if she was telling the truth about never wanting to see him again? Would she still accept his gift?

He didn't want to push her; because that was the last thing he ever wanted to do. He didn't want to force her back into this relationship if she couldn't handle it. The room was being swallowed by the dark, and a tear had fallen down Harry's cheek right before he had left it. The whole house had because resistibly dark and Harry felt the same way inside… empty.

He entered his room and there on his bed sat someone. Hoping it was Hermione, but when he saw the face he sighed. Maybe Hermione had felt bad and come back to him, but he was wrong. He stared at the person with a frown and shoved his hands into his pockets as they twitched like mad. He tried easing the moment, but he could sense the temper from the other one as well.

"I hear things are going good with you and Hermione." He said.

"Not anymore." Harry said as he took the present from his pocket and threw it against the wall. "It's over, and I've lost her."

"Good, it makes it easier for me." He said and Harry looked up. Those words Hermione had once said.

"Look, why are you here Ron?" Harry asked. "What is the purpose of you coming here and making matters even worse than they are?" He wondered.

"I wanted something, and you were in my way. I can't help but realize that I can easily get to you." He said, while to twiddled his thumbs.

"Well, could you leave? I need to pack." He said in a low voice.

"Running away are you?" Ron laughed. "Afraid we'll hurt you?" He wondered.

"Ron, what the hell is your problem?" Harry asked. "I came here because I was abused and you are making a joke of it? Well, I'd rather be abused than sit here talking to you." He said. "And I'm not running away."

"Well, why would you pack now if term isn't until September?" he asked.

"Ron, term starts in two weeks, and I'm not going to school anymore either." Harry said in a low voice. "Never again am I going."

"Where _are_ you going then?" He asked.

"Prison." Harry answered but Rom showed no more emotion then a smirk across his face.

"Excellent,"

* * *

He lay on his bed with his face down in the pillow. What mistake had he created to make people treat him like this? What had he done to them, but more importantly why are they doing this to him? Harry felt enraged with guilt and sadness as he tried smothering himself with the pillow, but no matter how hard he tried he couldn't take his own life out of the world. Something made him stay.

The blood trickled down his wrist where a newly formed slice had been made with the broken piece of glass in his bedside table. Everyone was turning their backs on him, but what hurt worse was his love had betrayed him. He never thought loving too much could possibly screw a life into the ground. Harry felt helpless, and he felt like he could never trust a soul again.

The pain hurt incredibly, and he didn't even know how it could stop. He wanted to see Hermione again. He wanted to hold her in his arms and tell her he was sorry. He wanted her to love him again, because that's when he had actually felt like a whole person. It seemed confusing that he had harmed her once and she had yelled at him, but when they made up they felt free.

Not anymore. Harry felt completely trapped, and he could already feel the chains around his body when they weren't even there. He closed his eyes and imagined. He could feel himself shiver as he sat in the cold cell and he felt blind from the light. One single light shown and that's when Harry had shook his head. He opened his eyes and his room was back in the picture. The warm bed and soft pillows from the burrow had returned to his senses.

Harry lifted his head to the sound outside. A long ear piercing screech had exceeded from the outside to inside his bedroom. He faced what made the noise, and there perched his owl. Her amber eyes were filled with sadness as she landed next to her master. Harry wiped the tears from his emerald eyes and took the item from the inside of her mouth. She nipped his finger in an affectionate matter, and she had once again taken flight.

Harry took the item and noticed it was indeed the morning edition of _The Daily Prophet_ for that day. He unrolled it was a frown on his face, and fear of the publicity that that damn Samantha girl was trying to write. She, to Harry, was actually _worse_ than Rita Skeeter would ever be. Harry felt like he wanted revenge towards her, but right now he needed to read.

_Harry Potter – Trial Number Three_

_Hello everyone, and a happy Sunday to you! I have found on accounts of our wonderful Ministry that there are some important things I need to write today. I have some big things and I know you'll all be greatly thankful to the Ministry that all this is happening. I wish you all a good day, but first on with my 'oh so wonderful' article about what's happening next weekend. _

_In no less then one week there will be a trail held here at the ministry. We are all excited, and I am too because it will be my first one yet! But anyways, on September 1st at 11:00am a trail for Harry Potter will be held. Potter was brought into this with over several charges! We aren't sure if we should let him walk freely or not, but the Minister, who specifically asked to remain nameless, is questioning whether Potter is stronger than the Dark Lord or not. We took a survey of those in Hogsmeade, and a whopping ninety percent said that they wouldn't dare walk the streets if he was a free man. _

_Our young hero has brought our life to new expenses. Potter has attended two trials once before, but it was never this bad. Once in his fifth year of school at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Potter had attended a trial right before leaving for school because he had performed a spell. He preformed it in a muggle infested town, and right under the nose of the Statue of Secrecy. Then once just last summer he had attended another one, which held the will of his long lost godfather Sirius Black. We all know that Sirius Black was held up in Azkaban for the murder of his ex-friend Peter Pettigrew. It was said that Sirius had killed both Lilly and James Potter, Harry Potter's parents, but what had Lilly and James done wrong to make sure a monster?_

_This trial is to see if we should in fact send young Potter to Azkaban for the murder of Tom Marvolo Riddle. It's true that Riddle would have been put to life if he was ever caught, but that doesn't mean that a young boy could kill someone and walk away like it was nothing. We enjoy no tolerance in our world, but Potter has made it rather difficult indeed. Why should a young boy kill and be free if no one else can? Do you find your children safe around a murderer? If your child was once, or is friends with him do you still think of him the same? _

_Recent accounts show that Potter is indeed staying at the humble, broken down, and poor house of Arthur and Molly Weasley. We have once again spoken to the Headmaster at Hogwarts, Albus Dumbledore, and he has claimed that Potter and the youngest Weasley son, Ronald, have been friends ever since their first year at school along with Potter's ex-girlfriend Hermione Granger. We, as the wizarding world, are going to hit this head on by asking each and every one of you for a vote. The minister will indeed be the one choosing Potter's route in life, but more importantly we want to know how safe you feel._

_The Ministry and I wish you a happy weekend, and congratulations to those attending their graduation year at your school. We wish you the best of luck for the upcoming years, and your future jobs. I'm Samantha Colleens, have a great Sunday everyone! _

Nameless? What was the minister up to? He had never actually met the new minister, but not even a name could be given? Harry folded the paper with a glare on his face. His eyes filled with more tears and his stomach had filled with even more fear. He shook while he held the pillow close to himself and bit his lower lip as he held the fabric. The fear tingled in his spine and he couldn't escape it. He needed to get away from here and he needed to be away from the wizarding world. He needed to be free.

He opened a drawer on the side of a nightstand and reached his hand inside it. He felt around in it for a while, and then his fingers had grazed something. He pulled out the object that was rolled into a tissue covered with blood. He gingerly flipped over the tissue's flaps and there laid a large wedge of glass with a blood stain trail facing Harry fully. He sighed. He promised her, but she betrayed him, so he's betray her.

He brought the glass to his wrist and pulled it across. His skin had easily split apart and the space between the thick cut layers of skin had filled with blood almost instantly. It trailed down his arm, but he didn't care. He pulled it across again, and again, and again, and _again._ Over twelve cuts were now on his forearm and his pillow was now stained with blood too. It still felt more painful on the inside then out, though.

Harry stood, covered in blood, and walked to the window. He opened it and had gently sat on the window sill. He could feel the silky curtains hit him as he looked down to the three stories below. He was on the fourth floor, and it was quite a ways up from where the ground was. Harry saw no one outside and the tears of pain had finally shed from his eyes. He could see a handprint of blood on the window from when he opened it. Then he looked down and wiped the tears from his eyes. He didn't want to do it, but then he spoke to himself.

"All I have to do is fall," He said. "Then it'll be over."

**Author's Notes:**

**Cliffy, don't you hate me? Haha. This chapter, I admit, was pretty intense, but I want to keep my readers on the edge of their seats. Did I keep you in suspense, probably not! Lol. I'm not a good enoughwriter to have that power. –sigh- Well I hope you like, and can't wait to update in two weeks! See ya soon! Oh, and I hate Ron in this story too, -wink wink-**

**Airalynn**

**To My Reviewers:**

**someone – **Someone will eventually, but do you like this story at all? Just wondering.

**FroBoy – **Yes! I completely agree with you, I'd turn into a monster! Hahaha, at least _someone_ is on my side. Hahaha. Thank you, and you did like this chapter, right? Lol, I'm paranoid.

**missradcliffe – **Thanks, and I did alright. Now I'm pretty good… you'd be surprised how much a week's worth of training can pay off. I agree that it's out of line, but it was a good addition to the story, wasn't it? Too bad Hermione's a bitch in this chapter and walked out of him. –is sad-

**mel53819 – **Thank you, but I think 'awesome' is a bit of an over exaggeration. Haha. I don't remember you tracking me down. –thinks- Nope, you're not in my memory, BUT YOUR IN MY HEAD! Lol.

**PrincessLuckyCML – **It's all good chicka! Well the Azkaban part seemed to get the story to be a bit more interesting, am I right? Haha, I suck at life.

**toga party** – I'm just curious, but what was confusing to you? And don't worry about delaying my reviews… as long as you send one at some point! Lol. I'm glad you like it, I really am. –huggles-

**Alright everyone, that's it. Remember that I am updating every other week now. I have over thirty six hours of work this week, and I couldn't possibly stand updating everything at that given time! Please understand that I can't do everything in one day.**

**Until next time!**

**UPDATED: (SATURDAY) AUGUST 27, 2005 – Remember that Wednesday was Rupert Grint's birthday, so let all shout it! HAPPY BIRTHDAY RUPERT! Or should I say Ronald? Haha.**

"**_Somewhere there's someone who dreams of your smile, and finds in your presence that life is worth while. So when you are lonely, remember it's true. Somebody somewhere is thinking of you."_**


	7. Chapter Seven: That Woeful Touch

**Chapter Seven:**

**That Woeful Touch**

Hermione felt guilty finally, but she didn't want to give in. It was three days till Harry's trial, and no one had seen him since their fight. They supposed he locked himself in his room. Each morning, afternoon, and dinner time Mrs. Weasley would leave a plate of heavy food in front of his door. The plates were beginning to pile up with the rotten food as it was untouched for so long.

Hermione sat on her bed, and she had no idea whether she should be worrying or if she could go for just a check. Her room seemed so empty since the night that they spent together, and how much she missed it. How much she wished it didn't end, and how much she wished that she had never said the things she did. She sighed and buried her head in her hands.

She began to cry, without even knowing why they were flowing out her eyes. Her chocolate eyes were full of crystal clear tears and she couldn't stop them. No longer could she bear to hold them back. She let them flow freely and she wiped her eyes when she heard a raping noise against the door. Her heart leaped.

"Harry?" She gasped.

Her head flung up so quickly she was surprised she didn't break her neck. The door opened and her heart was pounding with hope. She wanted to hug him if he was there and she never wanted to let him go, but when she moved to get the door it had flung open by a force. Her heart had suddenly returned to it's feeling of being split in half, and her tears came back.

"Hermione, are you alright?" A man asked as he stood in front of her.

"No," She said. "I will never be alright so leave me alone Ron." She said as her pillow muffled the sound.

"Come now, Hermione," He cooed. "Tell me what's wrong. I might be able to help." He said.

"You'll never be able to help." She said. Then she felt finger tips on the skin of her back.

She could feel the finger tips of Ron trace the details on the back of her slim tank top. She felt a shiver ignite through her body and small bumps began to form all over. She turned to face him and had instantly swatted away his hand. Her eyes were filled with tears and she stared at him like he was a bug.

"Stop it." She said.

"Hermione," he said in a mellow voice. "Let me comfort you." He said in a pleasing tone.

"No, it's not right Ron." She said. "I love Harry, and it's just completely wrong." She said.

"Him?" Ron asked with a snort. "Of all people how are you able to actually fall in love with _him_?" He sighed. "Am I not good enough?"

"No, Ron," She said. "It's not you it's just… you aren't Harry." She said as her eyes filled with water. "I shouldn't have fought with him, and I'm afraid he doesn't know how much I really love him." She said.

"Hermione," Ron said gently. Inside though, he was beginning to become impatient. "He let you walk away without even a word, and you did the right thing. I have no idea what you fought about, but I guaranteed you were right. Now, please, give me a chance?" He begged.

"I don't know if I-"

Her mouth was taken and her breath had suddenly grown short. She could feel the lips of him on hers. But, yet, she kissed back. Her thoughts were suddenly stopped, but she still wasn't happy. She pulled away as quickly as she could remember than this was not Harry kissing her, but an imposter. He kissed her neck and she had suddenly become quite chilly.

"Ron, I said stop it." She said, but yet the kisses trailed over her neck. "Ron, stop!" She demanded.

His tongue traced over her neck line, but she remained speechless. She could feel him beginning to situate himself upon her body. She meant to let out a scream, but it had suddenly rung through out Ron's mouth. He would not let her scream, he would not let her move, and suddenly she had relaxed herself. He touched her once around the waist and for some reason it felt like Harry.

Her eyes remained closed and she no longer could tell it was Ron. Why she forgot and why she wouldn't open her eyes was a mystery. She, though, let him continue. Then, though, she felt him move down her waist line and touch her under thigh and she shook him off her. She pushed him with so much force that his body had rolled across the floor.

"What the hell?" He growled at her, but she had made a run for the door.

She had covered her face and she peered through the cracks in her fingers to see where she was running. She ran into the bathroom and fell to her knees. Where was she to run, and why did she do this to him? Why did she seem to think it was better for Ron to be without him, yet let him do this to her? She needed to get away from him, she loved Harry, and she was certain that nothing was going to change her mind.

"What have I done?" She asked as she rocked back and forth in the flashing lights. "Why have I betrayed you?"

She wasn't talking to anyone, but the lights were flashing on and off like no tomorrow. She didn't care though, and she couldn't tell him. She felt trapped and then with monstrous loud steps she could hear him approach. She could feel his steps vibrate and her breath became warm and the night became cold. The puffs of breath were now visible.

"Come out come out where ever you are." A dark voice said on the other side.

"This is no time for games!" She screamed in hopes of scaring him.

"Aha, I knew you were in there somewhere." He laughed a malicious evil laugh.

"Leave me alone." She screamed. "I want nothing to do with you. I want you to rot in hell for giving me this torture!"

"That's almost exactly what you said to Harry, and look where you've ended up my dear." He smiled.

"I _wanted_ to hold you, I _wanted_ to make the feeling go away and for some reason I felt like I wanted to know you." She said. "To know everything about you, but then I realized that you aren't him. I don't want to be with you, don't you understand?"

"No," He growled. "What does he have that I don't? Ah, yes, he's famous." She gasped.

"What?"

"That's all you want isn't it? You want nothing but to be famous like he."

"That's a lie!" She protested.

A thump noise was outside the door, and then she could hear footsteps trailing away. The thing was that she could tell they weren't his, but of someone smaller. She put her ear to the door and she could hear breathing, but no movement. When she took a breath in, she had opened a crack in the door. The force wouldn't let her close it, and it swung open.

Ron's motionless body rocked for a bit and then felt flat on her. She screamed once more, but then she bent down. He wasn't dead, nor was he sleeping. Someone had petrified him, and someone had either attacked him or saved her. She knew he was fine, but she needed to get away, so she ran in a different direction. She knew where to go.

She ran down the west wing with tears once again in her eyes and she was pale from fright. She came to a large door, and she kicked away the piles of dishes in her way. She cried and pounded on the door. She cried and the tears ran down her cheeks. How could she have been so stupid to not come here before?

"Harry!" She cried. "I'm sorry, and I didn't mean what I said! I swear. Please believe me, and I need you so much now. I need to hold you close to me, and I wish for you to tell me everything is alright. I want everything to be ok between us, so please believe me. I want us to be together again, and I want you to be alright. You haven't been out in weeks and I'm worried about you. Please, just talk to me. I need you now, and I think Ron might be planning on hurting me. I'm sorry about what happened between us, and I didn't mean what happened between me and Ron. It was an accident. Now he's… he's completely mad! I didn't mean for it to go as far as it did, but I tried to get away, then I thought of you. I only wished it was you. Then the terror of his touch had shred through me like lightning. I had to get away. He wants me to leave you, but I can't leave you anymore. I got mad at you for the stupidest thing in the world, and I shouldn't have. I don't know what else you want from me but I'm so incredibly so sorry that you can't even imagine. Please listen to me, and please hear my plea for you to forgive me once again. We promised no more lies, and I won't lie to you any more. I love you. I love you more than words could explain and I need you to help me." She thought for a moment as her forehead lay against the door. "I am not asking you for forgiveness in only because I need help, but I need you. I can't live any longer without you, and I need you to free me from this torture."

She felt like she was crying out blood as her eyes hurt so much. She feels so dirty, and so unsanitary for having Ron actually touch her. It wasn't who she wanted, it wasn't who she needed. The only person that fit both of those descriptions was the person that was separated by Hermione because of a door. Hermione sighed and fell to her knees. She couldn't take this any longer, and she couldn't tell what was happening. She lay on the floor in a ball.

It was dark, and Hermione could feel the door in front of her creek open, but she couldn't help but keep her eyes closed. She felt hands reach under her, and she wasn't sure if she was trying to go to sleep, afraid to know who picked her up, or just didn't care any more. She wished it wasn't a dream, but if it was then she would wake with the same smile she wore in it.

She felt the skin of her back hit satin sheets, and she didn't even know where they came from. What was this place, and were they still at the burrow? She did as her intention was and opened her eyes. She could see a figure hover above her and she felt her breath grow warm. She couldn't see them fully, but she knew who it was.

"Where are we Harry?" She whispered.

"At the burrow," He whispered back. "With a twist."

"This isn't the burrow." She said. "Molly has no where near enough money to afford sheets or even a bed this size!" She exclaimed.

"Hermione, dear, I have more magic in me than you think I do. This is nothing but a simple spell, and I would think that you, being the brightest witch of them all, would know them." He laughed under his breath.

"Are you still mad at me?" She asked as she sat up and hugged him close. "I'm sorry if I hurt you, but I honestly had no idea what was going through my head. Somehow I thought that yelling at you would make you stronger and make you have a reason for wanting to fight."

"What would the reason be?" He asked.

"To make up with me, but I knew somewhere inside you that you would never even dared to have done it." She sighed and Harry pulled away.

"Hermione, that's exactly what you did, but why would you have said such a cruel thing to me? I almost jumped out the window." He said and she laughed under her breath. "Literally." And she gasped.

"I didn't mean for _that_ reaction!" She exclaimed.

"I know, but back on subject." He said in an orderly manner. "Why did you say such a cruel thing?"

"I was upset and somehow I didn't want you to leave, but that wasn't the main reason. The main reason was because I needed to find a way to break up with you with out harming myself, but it didn't work." She sighed.

"Why did you want to brake up?" He asked and her teary eyes looked up.

"Ron said you slept with Ginny, and it made me go a little insane." She said. "I'm sorry, I'm seriously sorry." She cried and pulled him into another hug.

"Its fine Hermione, but I want you to know that it's not true." He said. She smiled.

"Harry, do you mind if we pick up where we left off?" She asked. "_Before_ the news that you were having a trial?"

"Fine with me," He smiled. He went to lean in, but seconds before their lips touched he pulled away. "Wait a second, you kissed Ron?"

"Oh, that," She blushed. "It wasn't my fault. He came onto me, and then I closed my eyes and just thought it was you, but then I knew that you would never do that."

"Hermione," He said. "I wouldn't touch you any place unless you asked me to, and is that what he did?" He wondered. "Did he touch you?"

"Barely," She said. "He was going to, and I flung him off the bed to stop." She growled. "If you want a question, then will you please show me the real way?" She asked.

"Hermione," Harry said, a little surprised. "Are you sure you're ready?" He asked. "We've been dating for not that long."

"I want to get the picture of him out of my head." She said as she lay down to find a comfortable spot. "I want to get the fact that he tried raping me out of my head."

"_Rape?"_ Harry asked as he choked on the words. "He raped you?"

"I stopped it before it got out of hand, but yes, he tried." She sighed. "Please, I beg you, save me from this torment."

Harry thought for a minute. He wanted to do this as badly as she did, but they needed something clear first. He sighed and sat next to her, pulling his fingers through her curls and such, but no words were said. It was just a silence until she mouthed the word 'please' to him, and that's when he finally figured out the words to say to her at the moment.

"So you want me to sleep with you so Ron gets mad?" Harry asked as he crossed his arms. He could feel her hot breath upon his hip in the dark night.

"No, Harry," She looked to the floor. "Turn on a light, and then you'll see what I'm talking about."

Harry looked at her, but yet he could not see her. He could feel her, and she was definitely there, but her appearance was blurred out by the navy night. He turned to the side and opened a drawer. He pulled out his wand, and from across the room her turned on a light, when he turned back to her he jumped nearly ten feet. She was just silently crying.

"What... what happened to you?" He asked.

Hermione was covered in bruises from head to feet. Harry looked at her, and the memories came back. This is what he looked like, and even with his pain gone he could somehow still feel it. He could see and feel how much pain she was in, because he had once had it this bad too. How she was able to live with it was unbelievable, considering she had lectured him on it.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He asked. "If you told me what Ron was doing to you then I would have not cared about what happened. I don't want anything to happen to you." He said.

"I love you, Harry," Hermione whispered.

He didn't want to say the words, because he knew what happened the last time. His swooped his head down, and expecting a gently kiss, he had received a deep and desiring kiss. Without warning Hermione had pulled him close to her and pulled him on top of her body. Aware of what was going on, his mind went blank. The darkness had swallowed him whole too.

He felt a tug on his shirt and he had released his grasp on her. She pulled his shirt over his head and off him as quickly as she could so her lips could continue devouring his. She opened her eyes, to see his staring back at her. Their lips parted for a minute to breathe and Hermione stared at him like he was the key to the world.

"Are you sure you're ready? We can wait." He assured and she bit her lip.

"I'm positive." She said.

"But," He said when he went to kiss her but stopped. "What will happen after my trial?" He asked with a hint of worry in his voice.

"We'll just hope for the best, and hopefully you won't leave me." She said.

"As long as you are here beside me," He noted. "I don't want you to leave me either. I need you more than I thought." He said.

"I won't leave you again, but why is it that you've cut your wrists again?" She asked and he looked to the side.

"It was a small slip, I swear, I didn't mean it." He said rather quickly.

"Harry," She spoke with a voice of pure unbelief. "You have nine full cuts on your forearm." She said.

"Alright!" He shouted. "I wanted to get back at you. Are you happy?" He asked as his eyes looked to the side.

Hermione looked at him with no expression, because she herself had no idea what to think or to even feel about it. Harry looked to the side. She laid a hand against his cheek in hopes of guiding him towards her, but he moved his head once more away. He was determined not to look at her, but she was getting anxious. She tried again, but yet he turned away once again. She sighed.

"Harry," She said. "Come on, look at me!" She demanded. "I'm not mad."

"You have a right to be." He said when his saddened eyes had hit hers. She couldn't help but hold him closer.

"Why is that?" She asked.

"I promised you, and I broke it." He said. "I don't know why you claim you love me if I can't even keep a promise to you." He looked down.

"I don't care anymore about what I said!" She insisted. "I love you, and nothing will ever change that."

"But are you completely sure you want to do _this?_" He asked.

"Yes, but why do you keep asking me that?" She wondered and he shrugged.

"I guess it's because it doesn't seem like you. This isn't something that I would think top student Hermione Granger would get into." He said.

"So, I'll blow my cover." She winked.

"I dunno, you are rather _gorgeous._" He said with a frog like smile across his face. He practically drooled.

"Stop it," She giggled as his lips caressed her neck.

"Did I say gorgeous? I meant drop dead sexy." He growled playfully into her skin and she let out a piercing laugh.

"Stop… that!" She said as she pushed him up and pulled his lips to her. "Forget about our past," she said in between kisses. "I love you."

"I love you too."

His mind was telling him this was wrong, but he couldn't help but want this so much. He desired it so much that it hurt, and she lay in front of him, starving for him, and then he realized he was nothing but a plate. A plate of food that a monarchy starved for, and was this all he was good for? Stealing time and feeding the helpless? What would he do once term came around? Feed her once and then unleash his soul to the Dementors?

**Author's Notes:**

**Not a well written ending I might add, but I will be reasonable and admit that I, Airalynn, IS HORRIBLE AT LOVE SCENES! Alright, don't mind that giant outburst but I seriously tried my best, and it didn't really work. –sigh- I hate my work. But, I was also half asleep when I wrote this, so enjoy.**

**Airalynn**

**To My Reviewers:**

**PrincessLuckyCML – **Where are _your_ stories Connie? I'm waiting for a damn sequel and you're not giving it to me! WAAAAA! Lol, just kidding. But I'll cry for it! –give puppy eyes- Pweez:p

**Goddess of the heart – **I could have updated it last week, but I like to screw with y'all so deal with it! Just kidding, but I'm going to keep it at my two week basis.

**missradcliffe – **I originally was going to have Hermione barge in at the Trial and then say her mind, but I figured that would be too much of a fairy tale. Do you agree? I read stories like that every day, so I am trying to do something different, but it didn't work very well.

**call me brit – **The romance is back baby! ENJOY IT! Lol.

**toga party – **I update every two weeks, give me a break! Lol. But I'm not going to post a chapter in two weeks unless I have at least… I'll tell you at the bottom of the page. –wink wink-

**Scott – **I completely agree with you on the Ron part, and after this I'm sure you'll hate him even more. That's my connoted plan. Lol.

**Chris Boyer – **Thank you. Very much for reviewing, but especially enjoying it!

**Fro Boy – **You never know what'll happen later on, and I'm not going to tell you! –sticks out tongue- hahahaha.

**That's it for the reviews! I have one thing I request from you. The last couple of chapters I've had even reviews. For example: I have 6 chapters, and 60 reviews. I request ya'll to give me at least ten reviews and I'll update in two weeks. If you give me 20, I'll update NEXT week! Haha, I love presents. Lol.**

**UPDATED: (SATURDAY) SEPTEMBER 10, 2005 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHRIS COLUMBUS! Come on y'all, cheer with me. He did an awesome job on The Prisoner of Azkaban!**

"**_Dream as if you'll live forever; live as if you will die today."_**


	8. Chapter Eight: Crossing Path

**Chapter Eight: **

**Crossing Path**

His breath was hot on her skin as she shivered into the night. She had her eyes open and waiting for him to make a move. She traced circles in his peach colored skin as she did nothing but smile at him. He looked at her with his eyes pouring into hers like a fountain, but for some reason he wasn't sure if he could do this. What could he say after it was done and over?

He wasn't sure if he could do this anymore because of the way she looked at him. Something seemed wrong about what she wanted him to do. What would his parents think if they were still alive, and what would Hermione's mother say? Even worse question is what would Molly say if she found out they mingled inside her own home without knowledge?

He knew even if she did know then she's be furious. He could already imagine her speech inside his head. Her face turning purple and red from embarrassment and anger, and he could picture it and it made a shiver go up his spine. He looked back down at her and she looked at him like she was going to cry. Then suddenly he spoke without thinking of what he was going to say.

"I don't know if we should do this." He said looking down at the picture on her shirt. She looked sadder than before.

"Is it me?" She asked with a sigh. "Please, Harry, whatever you want I'll do it." She said, rather awkwardly. He stopped her.

"No, Hermione, it's the thought of what people will say." He said. "What would your mom say?"

"Why does that matter? It's our life and we should be able to live it the way we want. We're seventeen, and now we're even of age of marriage, but that of course has to wait." She said.

"I agree." He responded with a sigh.

He pushed himself up and bent his head down so their lips touched. She had a frown, but then she felt a tug on her shirt and she gave a wide smile. He was going to do this with her, and she was far beyond amazed. She wanted it so badly, but for a moment she wasn't sure if it would happen. She took in a breath and let it out once they parted. She just smiled at him.

She pushed herself up a little as her shirt had dropped off and fell to the side of the bed. He stared at her, and without a thought in her mind she became very insecure. She hated seeing herself in the mirror, so what would he think? Was this something natural to normal people who actually either live for this stuff or have done it over a million times before now?

He pushed back down as his stomach rested on hers. She closed her eyes and she could see Ron staring at her with pleasure, but she knew this wasn't him. This was the one person who she would ever want, and could ever think of. She thought of him as not only a boyfriend, but companion. She felt comfortable around him, and she began to become aroused in thoughts of greed for him.

Then, though, she felt him touch her legs and she screeched suddenly. Harry moved just in time to miss her throwing move to toss him to the ground. He sat up with a pant on him, and she tossed over and hugged her pillow. He stared at her, but she just began to cry into the pillow. He reached out and dragged his fingers light against the skin of her back, and she jumped once more.

"What is wrong?" He asked.

"I'm sorry, Harry," She said covering her mouth. "I thought you were… I couldn't help but think…" She trailed off.

"I knew you weren't ready for this." He said and stood from the sheets.

"No, Harry, please." She said.

"Hermione," He said with a sigh. "You've been through a lot, but this is not the way to get it out of your head. I love you more than words it self, and I want you to remember that, but I can't do this with you."

"I knew it was me." She said lowly.

"Will you stop putting yourself down like that?" He asked in outrage. "I hate it when you do that!" He growled in his throat.

"Well stop making me feel like this then!" She retorted.

"Do you know what?" Harry said suddenly. "Forget it! All we ever do is fight, and that's all we'll ever continue doing unless we try to be reasonable with each other." He said. "There is no relationship if we bicker twenty four seven." He sighed.

"You're right, and I'm sorry." She said lowly. "I'm just a little unhappy with myself about the way I look."

"You're beautiful Hermione, if only you'd let people see that instead of hiding it behind a book." Harry said gently.

"I can't help but think that opening up would have Ron after me again." She said before burying her head into her hands.

"I'm here for you Hermione, and I won't let that happen again. I need you to trust me and be able to open up to me especially to understand you." Harry said.

It was a brief minute before Hermione even had a thought cross her mind. She watched with a blank mind as Harry sat next to her. Both topless, but Hermione was not completely. She leaned against him as his arms snaked around her like ropes. She sighed and bent her head back so it rested on his collar bone. He sighed and his chin rested on her head.

"I love you, Hermione, and I want you to know that. Even if I go to Azkaban, I want you to know that I'll be back for you. Whether it's worth ten years in prison or not, I'll be back." Harry said.

"I love you, but I ask of you to make this one last commitment before you go, and when you return you have a girl waiting for you." She said with a smile. "Just please, take this path and commit your love to me." She begged.

"I'll hold you to that deal." He spoke. "But what if the path crosses, and I have to choose, and I don't know which one is which."

"Then you'll follow your heart and I know I'll find you when you walk out of there for the first time."

"I love you Hermione, now and forever." He said.

"I love you too, Harry," She said. "Please remember that."

"I will."

He leaned his head down and his lips had touched hers. She smiled as she felt him drag his fingertips along her skin. She shivered, but laughed as the tickling sensation warped through her body like a tidal wave. She circled her arms around his neck and pulled him over on top on her. His skin upon hers, and she craved for the taste of his kiss. She hugged him tightly, for this would be the last time in a while.

She felt his hands circle her breasts with a kiss that trailed down her cheek and to her neck. She just smiled with a light moan in her throat and not a thought in her head. She wanted this more than she could ever explain and for some reason she felt like he was holding back. She had moved her hand under her back, and with a click she had become completely topless.

Afraid to know what he would say, she closed her eyes, not even wanting to look at his expression. All she did was moan at the feeling of his hands clutching her, his hands moving her, and his touch devouring her. She began to lightly sweat. She was nervous and she seemed to be a little on the crossed side. Was this the right thing to do? She really did love him, and she wanted this so much, and they had already started and everything, but was it good to back down?

She didn't care any longer. She could feel his lips upon her chest and the sucks of might come from him. She couldn't back down, this was exactly how she imagined it, and the want was spreading like a disease. She wanted him, she hungered for him, and somehow she realized that she was forcing him. She begged him to do this, and she began her never ending greed for him.

She clutched the sheets deep within her palms as she felt the opening of her jeans. She could feel the air leaked to her waist and have her skin exposed to the open. It had taken nearly ten minutes before Harry had worked up to strength to remove them. She took in a breath and opened her eyes, only to once again meet his. She smiled lightly as a blush formed on her cheeks.

"Are you alright?" He whispered.

"Fine," She said.

She had placed her thumbs against his waist line and pulled him closer to her as she grasped his hips. She stared at him with a note from her mind to his. No words said but he had instantly understood was she asked, and that was if it was alright. With a nod of his head he allowed her, and soon he was lying once again on top of her pant less. She stared at him with her deep chocolate eyes full of fear in her, but she wanted this at the same time. She couldn't back down, so she closed her eyes one last time and was lying completely straight.

She felt her last article leave her skin and expose her to the world. She felt the insecurity come back to her as she felt his fingers massages against her. Taking the hint that he too had removed his last article, she took a deep breath and tried to keep herself completely relaxed. His chest had touched her once again and she opened her eyes. With a soft voice of unsure ness he spoke.

"Are you ready?" He asked softly into her ear.

She turned her head to face him and set a gentle kiss upon his lips. All she had done was nod her head, and almost instantly she felt him jam inside her. Her teeth clutched together as he moved further inside and she let out a light scream. He had pulled out and looked at her with knowing. He knew she wasn't ready, but somehow she seemed she still wanted to go through with this.

"Are you alright?" He asked with worry.

"Yes," She said. "It takes a while to get used to, but please, don't stop." She insisted.

"I don't want to do this if it hurts you." He said.

"It only hurts the first time," She said. "Then it gets better."

"Hermione," He said gently. "Please don't make me hurt you." He begged and she sighed and stared at him.

"I promise it will only hurt for a little," She said. "Please, just keep going."

She pulled the blanket over them as their bodies lay beneath it. She was tangled into him and soon she felt the burning feeling enter her again. She closed her mouth and screamed in her head so loud that it gave her a head ache. She clutched the sheets so hard she felt her hands growing purple. Her teeth were clenched together so hard she thought they would brake. She let out a breath.

She took deep breaths through her teeth. She could feel him pulling inside and out of her, but the pain was not simmering. It was like a ball of fire had entered her and burned her flesh to a crisp. She hugged him tightly, and the vibrations of a scream exceeded through the skin on his neck. She hugged him close and securely as he resumed his motions. She pushed her face to his and placed a long kiss upon his lips. It was deeper then ever and he pulled away for a breath.

"Woah, slow down." He said and she gave him a smooth smile.

"Just trying to forget the pain." She said. "I love you too much to consider this pain." She tried to smile.

His lips had resumed to hers and she felt him moved deeper inside her, but no longer did it hurt. No longer did she feel burning inside her, but she began to become wild and crazy as she practically devoured his lips. She hugged him tight. Her anguish and fiery feelings had left her completely as she felt him move in and part way out of her. She hugged him tight, waiting for the next move.

He watched her relax as he too became more relaxed. Must be the pain had left her, but that wasn't all he noticed. He could feel this funny feeling begin to travel through him, and with out knowing it, Hermione had suddenly felt the explosion from within her. Both covered in sweat, tears, and filled with fatigue. Harry had collapsed onto her and she pulled him close.

"I," He panted. "Love you, and when I leave…" he panted. "I wish for you never to forget me."

"Never, never," She insisted. "I'll always love you, and I'll be waiting for you when you return home to me."

"I'll be home as soon as I can." He said as he kissed her lips. "But, I haven't left yet, so please don't you leave me too." He said.

"I promised never once, but I broke it, and then I insisted I'd never break it again, but I feel like I have. So I have no idea how to respond to that." She said.

"Just say 'alright,'" he said. "Put no promises in it or anything, just a simple alright." He said.

"Alright." She said. "I wish for you not to leave, but it's not my choice." She sighed.

"Hermione," Harry said. "I have a question for you, but it might come as a shock to you." He said, still a little tired. "But I wish so much that you accept."

"What's the question?" She asked.

"When I, you know…" He said. "Get out of Azkaban," He whispered. "I am curious in hoping that you will marry me." Hermione smiled.

"You're… proposing?" She asked in amazement.

"You could consider it that," He said. "Yes." She thought for a mire minute before her lips had crashed up into his.

His lips had come back to her and she gave him twelve relaxing kisses back before they were pulled away by a noise. A banging noise came from outside the door and Harry had jumped slightly. Hermione held on to him for dear life as she could feel what was lurking outside the door. She held him tight and begun to whisper again. She had tears in her eyes from fear.

"It's Ron," she said, shaking. "He's come for me, and he's not going to be happy."

"Stay here," Harry said.

He had released himself from inside her, and she felt the weird burning feeling between her legs, but this time it didn't hurt. It just felt weird. She felt one of the two blankets that once covered them be pulled off the bed. She could see his figure wrapping the blanket around him and Hermione clutched the other close to her. Before he couldn't get her clothes off, but now she was right in bed. She had now become a plate for a thieving friend's jealousy.

"Harry, please be careful." She said. "He might be dangerous."

Harry had not listened to her. He just scurried to the bedside table and pulled out his wand. Muttering "_lumus_" a blue flame had emerged from the end of his wand, and with caution he approached the door. Hermione bit her lip so hard it had begun to bleed, but she didn't pay attention. She began to shiver with fear as the door burst open with a swish, and the hall way light erupted from the hall.

"How dare you!" Harry hissed at the man standing in front of him.

"Do I know you? Ah, yes, you are the one who _attacked_ me, but I'll let it slide." Ron said with a smirk. "I've come to collect my reward." Ron said with a lick of his lips.

"You disgusting varmint!" Hermione yelled. "I am not some prize to be won!" She demanded. "Leave me alone!"

"Wait a second," Ron said as he looked around. "What's this, you're both clothes less, meaning you have been screwing my bride." Ron hissed at Harry, and then turned to Hermione. "How dare you cheat on me wench!"

"I'm not _cheating_ on you!" Hermione said. "I never loved you, and I never will." Ron stepped closer, reaching for the blanket. "Don't you dare look at me, or I'll kill you!"

"We'll see about that, my dear." He said with a smirk of greed for her on his face. He walked towards her.

"Keep away from her!" Harry said in a deep voice.

"Potter," Ron said. "You _dare_ stand up to me?" He asked. "You know how weak you are."

"I, Ron, am not a coward. I do not flea when someone I love is in danger, not like you. For you are the one who puts them in danger. You are the one who laughs at their pain and sorrow. You do nothing but copy criminals around the world, by raping helpless girls as a sign of jealousy." Harry spat. "You nasty conniving scum."

"She came on to me, and this is none of your business." He yelled.

"I did not you filthy…" She stopped as Ron looked at her. "HARRY... I DO!" She screamed. "I LOV..." she stopped again.

A plate had former over her mouth, stopping her from talking. She tried to remove it, but another spell was flung at her as she was chained to the bed. Ron looked at her with greed, and with no way of getting out of this; she tried her best to think of a way to be heard. Maybe if she signaled Harry, he'd either get help, or flip and screw up. What would her decision be though? Harry was still struck that she said she would marry him. She screamed the two words, and there she sat, naked, and covered only by a blanket as a hovering pervert stood greedily above her.

"hew eeee!" She cried, but the plate had drowned out her sound and words for help.

"Shut it, wench!" Ron growled. He took another step closer to her.

Harry stepped forward too, bringing his hand to Ron's shoulder, pulled him around and sending a punch right at his cheek. Ron fell to the floor and Harry tried shaking the pain out of his hand. He moved to Hermione who was still chained to the bed and a plate over her mouth. He looked at her and studied her for a moment. He didn't have an answer for her that was good.

"I don't know how to get you out of this." He said gently, but Hermione was distracted.

"WOK AUUUU!" She screamed. She pointed as far as she could with her chained hands.

Harry could see the figure through Hermione's glassy eyes. Ron was standing up, and hovering over them. He was reaching for Harry, in hopes to pull him over and beat the hell out of him, but instead Harry was ready to fight. When Ron looked like he was about to strike Harry, Hermione screamed again. Ron had slapped Hermione instead across the face.

"I told you to shut up wench!" He said and tears came to Hermione's eyes as she screamed again.

Ron went to strike at her again, but Harry had caught him. Harry had his wrist in his hand and bending it back, knowing that it didn't bend that way. Harry had a smirk of terror on his face when Ron growled back at him. He pushed him against the wall, but Harry didn't move very far. So he pushed back and then armed himself properly. His wand at Ron's chest, but then no sooner was Ron's wand at Harry's throat. Harry still had the blanket wrapped around his waist.

"I told you that she was with me." Harry said. "So leave her, and me, alone!" He snipped.

"What's the proof that she's with you? She told me she loved me." Ron said and Harry looked to the side.

"You're a liar, you've always been one and you always will be one." He said, walking towards him with another step.

"We'll just see about that. For now, I'm taking my girlfriend back." Ron said with a lick of his lips.

"If you can see we're quite busy, and you will not touch my fiancé!" Harry growled with madness flaring in his eyes.

"Your... _fiancé_?" Ron asked as if he'd been slapped.

**Author's Note:**

**Intense chapter I must say, but it's alright. I heard from the great vine that Fanfiction is deleting all stories with sexual contact or anything of the sort inside, so hope with me that this doesn't get banned. I did a horrible job on this, but I took a chance and went for it. I don't have time to write something completely different, so bear with me. But I warned you! lol.**

**Airalynn**

**To My Reviewers:**

**FroBoy – **Hope you like, and keep up with those reviews! I love them and thank you for your time to read these chappies. Lol.

**PrincessLuckyCML – **No problem and I also have a proposition for you, but I wish not to discuss it here. Get online soon and I'll discuss your... _payment_. Lol, I'm so secretive!

**missradcliffe – **I gave it a try and it came out horribly, but I never know if you like it until you read it, so please help me! Lol, and what's up with the five reviews? Trying to reach twenty? Lol.

**call me brit – **Touché they are. And look where it wound up, what will happen? Lol, stay tuned and remember I update every 2 weeks!

**toga party – **That's one way to get through essays, hahaha. Sorry, but no, you lost me with the portkey thing. Is it a website names after the items in the book or something? And 42 chapters? I'D DIE! I'm afraid this story will only have about twenty, because I'll get bored with it at some point and have no place to go with it. I would have given up at the 5th week. lol, but 31 _months?_ Talk to you soon, and feel free the email me at Airalynnmay2008 at hotmail dot com. (Sorry but they delete the codes.)

**iluvdeath – **You're right, I was thinking Alfonzo when I wrote it. Thanks for showing it to me, because I wouldn't have noticed. Thank you! And enjoy!

**UPDATED: (SATURDAY) SEPTEMBER 24, 2005 – **I have two belated birthday wishes to send!

**1.** Happy belated Birthday to **Elizabeth Spriggs** who plays the **Fat Lady**. (Sept. 18th)

**2. **And the last is a Happy belated Birthday to **Tom Felton** who plays the evil role of **Draco Malfoy**. (Sept. 22nd) He turned 18!

**That's all... HAPPY BIRTHDAY WISHES!**

"**_Don't think of life as an essay already written, but think of life as an outline still in the process of changing." MY FAVROITE QUOTE! lol_**


	9. Chapter Nine: Toothpaste

**WARNING: HALF BLOOD PRINCE SPOILER INSIDE CHAPTER!**

**Chapter Nine:**

**Toothpaste**

He spat the words like lemon juice on a tongue. The sweet and tangy words made him instantly sick to his stomach. Could these words be right? Did Harry honestly say that? Ron's face was beginning to bulge with anger as a whip of white hot jealousy slashed through him and back out. He growled in his throat, and noticed it was dry like straw. It was scratchy, and he had no words to say at all.

He looked around as the warmth rose within the room. Chained, naked Hermione to the bed and the blanket was beginning to fall. What was he doing? This wasn't him, this wasn't him at all. He didn't even love her, he loved someone that they didn't even know about, but something made him do this. What could have been done without knowledge and feeling towards it? What had he done?

"That can't be…" Ron stuttered. "She wouldn't choose you over me!" He said, a flare of fire reflecting in his pupils.

"Well, that's what it is, now let her go." Harry demanded. "Now."

"I have a better idea." Ron smirked. "_Immobulus!_"

A gust of pink flew over Harry as he felt himself stiffen and glue to the floor. He growled in his throat, and then he spoke 'your regrets…' His eyes flared like snakes in cages. Tangled within the bars of his sight, the serpents dripped with venom. It leaked from its teeth, and glared directly at Ron, but Harry could not control this bloody thirsty beast from within him. He couldn't make it disappear.** (I love this paragraph! What do you think? Lol)**

"What's going on?" Ron said with a bit of nervousness.

Harry closed his eyes. The walls began to shake in the dark room, and then the cracks in the ceiling became pitch black. It filled with tiny insects that ran across the walls and onto the floor. Piling up, Ron let out a yelp as he jumped on the bed, hoping to make Harry mad. He reached for the blanket, and Hermione screamed with all her might. Never would she let him touch her.

She pulled at the chains that made a chiming noise. The cups of tight metal made rings around her wrist. She pulled, hoping to squeeze her hands out of the traps that she lay in. The clamped metal began to slice through her skin, but she pulled more rigidly. She felt like her hand was going to snap off her wrist, but either way they weren't working. She let out another yelp.

The black beasts were along the floor, unable to get on the bad. Spiders. They covered the floor with a thick layer of black. Ron looked around, sending a shielding guard spell to make them unable to reach the bed. Ron smirked at the woman lying beside him. He sat down, and ran a hand along her body. She became restless to murder him right then, but she still had no effort to move.

"You gave me my worst nightmare, and now... I'll give you yours." Ron said with a lick of his lips.

He reached under the blanket, and with a slight move she tried moving away from him, but she couldn't. He grasped her chest and she felt herself sweat. What the hell was he thinking while he was doing this? Her eyes were glassy and stared at him, hoping to make him stop. She glared at him, eyes big with tears, and she felt completely filthy with his hands upon her.

She felt his hands circle her stomach, and his eyes pressed on her. Her cheeks grew red and her heart felt like a volcano. The eruption was about to start as his fingers waltzed their way down to her thigh. She gulped and made another yelping sound, but nothing seemed to be helping her right now. She felt them moved up her legs and upon the mid section, and she let out a scream of terror as he pressed a finger inside of her.

A gust of wind had suddenly come and Ron suddenly took away his hand. He was carried high and then dropped a little. Before he could realize what happened his back was connected with a wall. He was slammed into it with so much force it felt broken, he slid to the floor with a loud thump. It got quiet once again, before Hermione had noticed something.

She looked up and stared at Harry. He had finally opened his eyes and they were lit up in red. She felt a shiver go down her spine. His red eyes pointed straight at Ron with a straight face and knotted brows. The fire snakes of anger slithered through his pupils like bulls. Her lips were purple as the plate fell from the parting between them. Her chains disappeared, and she clutched the blankets around her.

She stood with the blankets wrapped around her tightly, and a burning feeling rising between her silky legs. She could see her lover, still with fire in his eyes, and her unconscious rapist who lay on the floor without a move or sound from him at all. She turned and with a swift move she began to run across the room, throwing her arms around Harry with fear.

"Please stop this!" She begged. "You're eyes are filled with hate and fear as it sends a shiver towards me." She said. "Please stop looking at me like that."

"Do not be scared." He said in a deep voice.

Hermione looked up as his cold, icy silver eyes slowly and gently evolved into the cool crystal green color. She let out a heavily sigh as her breath became visible in the midnight dark. She let out a small smile as she hugged him close to her, and looked to the side to find Ron once again in her sight. She sighed and hugged him closer to her.

"It's not over." Hermione spoke.

"Why do you say that?" He asked, stroking her strands of hair.

"When you leave, he'll come after me again." She said. "He'll create an obsession with me, knowing that you won't be there to protect me. He knows how much I love you, but he'll find a way to shut that out of his mind and turn it into pure hard anger towards you, and pain towards me. Why am I supposed to live through this Harry? I have already lost so much, and I'm losing more now... why does this have to happen too?" She cried into his shoulder.

"He won't be able to touch you, even when I'm gone." Harry said with a lining of silver in his eyes again. "Rejoice Hermione, for you shall feel my wrath Ronald Weasley." He said sharply as spit by a snake.

"Re... Rejoice?"

* * *

It seemed like dawn approached faster than anyone could keep up with. It was morning of Harry's worst nightmare: his trial. He woke with a yawn to Hermione, naked, at his side and an unconscious Ron still sleeping in the corner. Harry slid his arm out from under Hermione's waist, hoping not to wake her, and placing one silent kiss on her lips. She just tossed over with out awaking.

He stood from the bed, and breathed in the fresh morning dew, for this would be the last time he would smell it. His eyes searched for the normal bright golden sun as he dressed himself properly, and removed his skin from the atmosphere. He sighed, his last morning felt like his first morning returning to the Dursley's after school ended. It was like the dreams that he died in, were the best he'd ever had or dreamed of having.

He dragged himself into the bathroom, where he drew himself a steaming hot bath. The water filled up as the soap bubbles began to multiply before his eyes. He gently removed his clothes once again, folded them neatly, stacked them on the chair, and stepped in the water. The ripples splashed at the sides of the tub. He closed his eyes and sank in the depth of the bathwater and stayed there.

Flashes of white lights and people were surrounding him and swirling in his head at a rate faster than sound. He saw his parents, the Dursleys, and everything that seemed to happen in all the years of school. It flashed by him, and his memory recharged fuller than he thought it could hold. He could feel every feeling he once could feel, but he did not want to leave this place where he had brought himself to love more than anything, except Hermione.

He could see the train, the chocolate frogs and the candy spread out across the seat. Hermione came and met him and Ron as they led through an adventure of torture and terror. The stories they were told and the arrival of this new castle. He could feel the warmth, joy, and anxiousness rise in him once again. His first flying lesson, first meeting Ron and Neville, entering their first adventure with becoming the Golden Trio was all in his head. The first time they met fluffy, and all the excruciating tasks they lived through to get the Sorcerer's stone. The one thing, though, that he loved the most was his first House Cup championship.

He was beginning to see the small friend who was known to Harry as Dobby the House Elf. His second year was approaching his mind, but this was one of the worst years. He heard talk, and he was nearly killed by the Womping willow. He was nearly expelled, and he was nearly killed by a snake. When he met Voldemort's sixteen year old self and saved Hermione and others lives who were once petrified by battling the hungry basilisk in the Slytherin chambers..

Third year he ran from the Dursleys, hoping to free himself eternally, but it was not over. He magnified his aunt from pure anger that was steaming from him. This is when he found that Sirius Black, his long lost godfather, who he believed was the one responsible for the murder of his parents was innocent. When Hermione introduced her "time – turner" she brought him through the long day a second time to save the mistake the ministry was about to make happen.

Then, fourth year, tri wizard tournament came to his mind, the one thing he never wished to remember. Being put in the tournament and testing his skills while risking his life to wind up trapped within Voldemort's graveyard. Harry had his first real fight with Ron, he was faced with the Yule Ball, which sucked, and he was to battle a dragon and other dangerous tasks. In the end, though, was the worse. He came into the graveyard, and watched a newly fresh friend, that was side by side with him in the tournament, die. Voldemort and Harry dueled, and neither of them won again.

Then, came fifth year, one of the most complicated of them all came. His mind flashed to the fight between him and Seamus, Hermione's obsession with S.P.E.W, his suspension from Quidditch, and the first girlfriend Harry actually had. Cho Chang was his crush for almost three years straight, and when Harry agreed to teach Defense Against the Dark Arts, because Umbridge was stupid, she grew close to him. Then it didn't work out well between them, but the D.A.D.A lessons worked out well in the end. His battle in the ministry with nearly ten others at his side worked successfully, but he lost his godfather as a result.

Sixth year was hoping to be a blur to him, but it was as clear as ever. Harry began to have a great liking for Ginny Weasley. When he congratulated her win on the Quidditch match, he had kissed her and that had instantly pulled them together. Whether Ron wanted them to date or not, they did it. Then Harry was on the trail in thinking Malfoy was hiding something, when he found that he was actually siding with Voldemort. Dumbledore told him that he knew what could kill Voldemort, and when Harry assisted him Dumbledore returned fairly weakened. When Harry found Snape's real thoughts, it was too late. Snape had murdered Dumbledore to stop Draco from doing it. At Dumbledore's funeral he broke up with Ginny, and made the decision not to return to school.

Now, though, everything was different. Harry had officially killed Voldemort over the summer, and now he was free to return. He would return too, but one thing was standing in his way. This trial was the only thing, and Harry was beginning to space in and out of his situation, forgetting he was lying under water. He didn't care whether he had to breathe or not, he just laid there. Though as fast as lightning something had grabbed his arms and pulled him up.

"Harry..." The voice echoed in his head. "Harry... Are you alright?"

The blackness was slowly disappearing, but he still could not make out who the figure was in front of him. The bubbles of light were clashing together as it put the pieces together like a puzzle. He could see the outline of an image, when he choked out the word yes, he began hastily coughing and his sights became slightly clear. It was Hermione, and she kneeled next to him.

"Are you sure you're alright?" She asked gently.

"Yes, Hermione, I'm fine." He coughed.

"Good," she said with a deep breath. "HOW COULD YOU BE SO STUPID?" She shouted.

"Wh... wha... What?" He coughed.

"Were you trying to _drown_ yourself out of the trial?" She asked. "I thought we agreed no more suicidal thoughts. You know how much I love you." She said hastily.

"I'm sorry, but that wasn't my intention." He said. He leaned over the side of the tub and grasped her hard in his grasp. "I love you, Hermione, and I wish not for us to part." He said into her ear.

"What?" She wondered. "What had gotten into you?" She asked.

"I had flashbacks of basically my entire history!" He said. "How long we were together, and how long I spent to find out that I desperately loved you." He said in sympathy. "Besides Ron, I regret nothing last night." He mumbled.

"Neither do I, Harry," She said. She pulled herself away from him, when she had placed a kiss on his lips.

"What should I do?" He asked between kisses, and she stopped.

"Go in there, and fight your way to innocence! Both you and I know there is nothing against you, and if they don't listen to us than no one will. You have to go in and win, or fight to the death trying." She said inspirationally.

"_Death?_" He gulped.

"It's a figure of speech." She smiled in reassurance. He messed up his face, and then relaxed it.

"Oh..." He said, trialing off.

"_Honestly!_" She giggled. "Have you learned nothing?" She asked, and he blushed with a side smile.

"Yup!" He said. "That's about all you can say: nothing."

She leaned forward and kissed him gently on the lips. With out even thinking or paying attention she was suddenly clothes less and sinking into the water with him after locking the bathroom door tightly. She smiled as she drifted forward so her back rested against his chest and her hair tied in a knot at the back of her head. His fingers swirled around hers as she played with them. She smiled.

"You don't mind this," she asked. "Do you?"

"Not at all my dear." He smiled and nuzzled her neck playfully. "Only a few hours till the trial, Hermione, and I'm still not sure of what to say."

"I know what I'm gonna say!" She retorted.

"What?" He asked. "You're not going to be inside!" He ordered.

"No, before you go in I'll say 'I love you,' and then you'll be happy." She said in a perky/hyper/mysterious mood.

"I'm not so positive about that Hermione." He said as he snaked his arms around her stomach and gripped her sides, hugging her close and smelling the scent of her hair.

"Why do you say that?" She asked, laying her head back against his shoulder. She felt his finger tips explore her body and she moaned slightly.

"I don't think a few nice words will save me from this trial." He sighed. "Remember what happened in the summer before fifth year? _That_ trial?"

"Yes," She moaned. "And you got out of it just fine." She said.

"If it wasn't for Dumbl..." Harry sighed. "His name will haunt me forever." His hands rested on her legs for a minute.

"What's wrong?" She asked in a wondering tone.

"My Hogwarts letter," He said. "It said 'Albus Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.'" He said "How can he be headmaster if he's... you know... like Cedric... and Sirius... and... my par..."

"OK Harry!" Hermione said. "I get it." She sighed. "Maybe they got a new one, but to make it seem like nothing changed and to respect him they put his name on one last letter?" She said in a questioning tone.

"I don't know." He said as his fingers once again started trailing up and down her legs as she moaned silently to herself.

"Let's just hope for the best," She said. Harry kissed her neck lightly. "And let's hope it's not someone like _Umbridge._" She warned.

"Let's all hope." He said as he began sucking lightly on her neck.

Hermione stopped him as she sat up straight. She sprung to an upright position and looked around. Harry was constantly whispering 'what is it?' and 'what's wrong?' but she ignored him. Then, though, she heard feet echo through the hollow floor boards and she laid a hand on Harry's mouth to quiet him. She sighed and she turned with a gentle whisper towards Harry.

"Shush!" She said. "I think its Mrs. Weasley." Then a knock came on the door. "Yes?" She said, cupping Harry's mouth.

"Hermione, dear," a voice said from the hall. "May I come in? Ginny has lost her toothpaste." She said sweetly.

"Can't you just conjure some?" Hermione begged. "Take a breath!" She hissed silently at him.

"My wand is just not as good as it used to be!" She said sadly.

The door handle started wiggling, and Hermione had shoved Harry under the water to hide him. The soap bubbles surrounded him, and then no sooner was Mrs. Weasley marching in the room with a rhythm on step. She looked around, looking for tube she desired to find. Hermione looked hurriedly at her, worrying that she might recently be drowning Harry and not knowing.

"It's on the table Molly!" She said quickly.

"Oh, yes, thanks Hermi..." She stopped. "Wait, isn't this Harry's bathroom?" She asked.

"Yes, but..." She thought. "The taps weren't working right so I asked Harry if I could bathe in here and he said he didn't mind." She said hastily.

"Oh, alright," She said. "I'll have to have a look at that, see you soon dear." She said.

"Bye,"

Hermione said as Mrs. Weasley had basically waddled out the door. Each step creating a creek in the floorboard, and Hermione looked scared. Was he alright? Was he still alive? She was taking too long to go out the door and she could feel Harry poking her, telling her he needed air quickly. He was loosing it, but as soon as Mrs. Weasley closed the door he sat up and breathed.

"Ahh.." He said. "That was..."

"Oh, Hermione," She said as Harry was once again shoved under water.

"Yes, Mrs. Weasley?" She asked.

"Have you seen Harry lately?" She asked. "He has a half an hour till we have to leave!" She complained.

"No, sorry, but I haven't." She said. "But if I see him I'll tell him you're looking for him." She said.

"Thanks Dear."

She said, and she was once again out the door. Harry sat back up and breathed like it had been ages. He huffed a bit, but he managed to get his breathing back to a steady pace. Hermione patted his back lightly as she locked the door with her fingers once more. She twisted the lock and turned back to Harry who was hunched over, coughing into the water. She looked at him in sympathy.

"Sorry about that." She said. "Are you alright?" She wondered.

"Fine, but warn me next time." He said with a smirk.

"I did!" She reciprocated.

"Yeah, and then you just shoved me under water, and I had no idea what was going on." He said, and she shrugged.

"I'm sorry, but if Molly saw you..." She gasped. "I would be so shameful!" She whined.

"At least she didn't see me, which _would_ be horrible." He agreed. "What did she want anyway? Just toothpaste?" He wondered.

"And to tell you that you have a half an hour till you have to leave for your trial, and I'm coming with you. I don't want to stay here claiming I'm packing for Hogwarts, and find myself crying for you." She said.

Harry leaned forward and wrapped her in his arms. He pulled her to her and kissed her lips deeper than ever. He didn't want to let go, and he didn't want to leave her alone. She had been through so much, and he couldn't survive without her. She was his life now, and he would not turn his back on family. The Weasleys would be okay, for they would end up sending him candy and such until he was once again free. He pulled away.

"I love you Hermione, and I'll be back for you." He whispered

"I'll be here waiting." She said. "But... What about Ron?"

"We..." Harry stopped. "How did Molly not see him when he walked in and out of here a few minutes ago?" He asked.

"Maybe she thought he was just sleeping, or she passed him... but anyway!" She whined. "What are we going to do?"

"Might as well obliviate him... maybe he'll forget his obsession with you too, and then hopefully it will all be in our heads." Harry recommended. "His parents would turn us away if we told _anyone_."

"We need to be smart about this Harry," She said responsibly. "Is there a way we can obliviate him out of his obsession with me?" She wondered.

"Only if we get him a girlfriend, but I need you to forget about it too!" He said. "You will be sorry if you don't." He warned. She let out a sigh.

"I know, and I fully agree." She said. "You know what to do."

* * *

**Author's Note:**

**I'm sorry that I didn't update last week everyone, but I've been working up to ying-yang. Lol. At least I got it done though... right? Oh, and it's against Fanfiction rules to have Author's notes at the end of chapters, so PLEASE don't send me in. I _really_ don't want this story deleted. If you are planning on sending me in, warn me so I can fix something... please.**

**Airalynn**

**To My Reviewers**

**toga party – **Alright, I found it and I am in the process of reading it! It might take me a while though, but GREAT job so far! Gotta hate Ron, Huh? Lol

**FroBoy – **Sorry again that I'm so late, but enjoy!

**ravensuductress – **It will only get deleted if they come across its path in a summary thing. They don't actually _read_ your stories.

**JsBurnz – **Update _soon_? There's a bit of a problem with that... lol.

**call me brit – **I should have updated on your birthday for a gift, SORRY! It wasn't finished by the 8th. (Is that the right date?) But HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY! How old are you, because if you're older than me you suck! Lol, just kidding.

**Sarah – **Thanks pal for reviewing because my _other_ reviewer's reviews didn't add up to ten. So I found you in a chat room, and I'm so happy now! Love ya gurl!

**That's all... I'd like to remind you that I'm not updating unless I have 10 reviews for this chapter, because I love seeing it at the "ten mark" each time. Send one, two, send _four_ if you want... as long as they add up to 10!

* * *

**

**UPDATED: (SATURDAY) OCTOBER 15, 2005 – I want to send them now, so I don't forget... SOOOO... I have some October Birthday wishes!**

**1.** Happy Belated Birthday to **Richard Harris** who played the role of **Dumbledore** in Sorcerer's Stone and Chamber of SecretsHis Birthday: **October 1st **

May he rest in peace...

**2. **Happy Belated Birthday to **Christian Coulson **who played teenage **Tom Marvolo Riddle**in Chamber of Secrets. His Birthday: **3rd**

**3.** Happy Belated Birthday to **Will Theakston **who played Slytherin Quidditch Captain: **Marcus Flint** in Chamber of Secrets. His Birthday: **4th**

**4. **Happy Belated Birthday to **Ian Hart **who played the role of **Professor Quirrel **in Sorcerer's Stone/Philosopher's Stone. His Birthday: **8th**

**5. **Happy Belated Birthday to **Dawn French **who currently plays **The Fat Lady**. Her Birthday: **11th**

**6. **Happy Almost Birthday to **Veronica Clifford** who played **Mrs. Mason **in Chamber of Secrets. Her Birthday: **20th**

**7. **Happy Almost Birthday to **John Cleese **who plays **Nearly Headless Nick**. His Birthday: **27th**

**8. **Happy Almost Birthday to **Robert Hardy** who plays **Cornelius Fudge. **His Birthday: **29th**

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU ALL OCTOBERERS! Hahahaha...

* * *

"**_There's only us, there's only this, forget regret or life is yours to miss. No other road, no other way, no day but today." _**


	10. Chapter Ten: Innocent

**Chapter Ten:**

**Innocent**

The bathroom was full of steam when it came time for them to get out. Their fingers were pruned and wrinkled from being in the water as long as they were. Hermione had gotten out first, gently wrapping a towel around her slim body, and then Harry had stepped out. Hermione handed him a towel, and when he was covered, she stepped into his arms and leaned against his chest. He was a shocked a bit at first, but then he just laid his hands against the back of her waist.

"I love you." She said as a tear fell down her cheek.

"Now, now," He cooed, "Everything will be alright. I promise." He said. "Please don't cry."

"I don't want you to leave." She cried. "I want us to live happily ever after, and possibly skip this year. Let's run away and get married Harry! We can have kids and live in peace and quiet!" She begged. "Let's just disappear."

"Hermione," He sighed. "You know better than I that we can't do that. You know that I'll be back in a few years, but please, write me everyday?" He wondered.

"Twice a day." She said proudly.

"Hermione, you're studies are more important then where I am or what I'm doing." He insisted.

"You cannot possibly say that!" She battled back.

"Hermione, I want you to walk into that school and forget about me at that moment. I want you to get your studies done, and leave Hogwarts and make a living. When I get out I expect you to be one of the top Aurors, or a healer, or something worth while. Just please don't ruin your future because I am going away."

"Harry, I…" She stopped.

A kiss had been laid on her lips, but she could not resist the urge to kiss him back. She wanted to tell him that his theory had nothing to do with her intentions, but she didn't want to leave him. She didn't want to walk away knowing that this could possibly be the last time they would be together. She sighed.

"You have to leave in fifteen minutes." She said groggily.

"Lets get the obliviating done, and then we can have one last cozy time." He said with a smirk.

"Sounds good to me." She smiled in return.

Still with towels around them, they entwined their fingers and Harry led the way out the door. He grabbed his wand off the table outside the door, and proceeded to walk to the sleeping Ron in the left room corner. He was quite pail looking, but he seemed to be alright, for he was sleeping. Harry pointed his wand directly at him.

"Wait!" She said.

"What Hermione?" He whispered so Ron would not wake up.

"What if you screw up the spell and he doesn't remember anything from his past?" She asked, gripping his arm.

"You must not be able to trust me much if you just asked me a question like that." Harry said, rather offended.

"No, I'm sorry," She piped. "Just get it over with."

She pressed her eyes into his arm as she sensed him raise his other arm, pointing his wand directly at Ron. She could hear him clearly and powerfully speak the spell with regret and she felt vibrations through his arm that stretched across his body. She picked her eyes out from his arm and sighed. She hugged him closely with short breaths hitting him. He turned his head to her.

"You're next." He said. "You must trust me Hermione," He paused. "I would never do anything to hurt you… I love you." He whispered.

"I trust you, Harry," She sighed. "It's your power that I don't."

She stepped in front of him, and nervously she shut her eyes. She thought about everything she wanted to forget thinking that if she thought about it, than those would be the only things that left her mind. Even a mere thought brought pain to her chest with an ever gentle pound of the heart. It was like she relived it all over again, but still, she knew this would be the last time she would even know it existed.

The last thing she heard was the words, and then a sweep of bright light came over her, and she felt her mind swirl into a vortex of white and green. She felt a piece of her mind leave her, and then with a blurry vision in her eyes, she opened them. She came face to face with a man that kneeled before her. She wheezed a bit and tried to sit up, catching her breath recently.

"What happened Harry?" She asked. He needed to think of something quick.

"I… purposed to you, and you fainted." He mumbled, knowing grandly that that was an innocent lie.

"I'm sorry," She said quickly.

"Well, you fainted after I asked if you wanted to get married after I get freed." He said.

"Freed!" She exclaimed. "You're trial! You were supposed to meet Molly ten minutes ago!" She said, in a worried fashion.

"Merlin…" He mumbled.

He shuffled around his room, still in a towel, at a quick speed, and searching for warm and comfortable clothes to wear. Hermione, still wrapped in her towel, sat on the bed as her long strings of wet hair covered her face. A tear fell down her eye, and when Harry was fully dressed in jeans, a back tee-shirt, and his 'trainers' shoes, he saw her and noticed her tears. He sat beside her, feeling her pain.

"I'll be back, Hermione." He said, but she couldn't even look at her. "It's not forever."

"It feels like it Harry, we both know it's going to go by so slow that it causes both of us even more pain." She said. "I love you, and I don't want to loose you."

"But eventually it'll end, and it won't be the end of the world." He insisted. "I'll write you everyday, and it won't even matter where either of us is." He said. "I love you too Hermione."

He wrapped an arm around her waist and with his opposite hand he pulled her chin to face his fully. He smirked with a light smile, as he could see the pain and sadness squirm with a silver thread through her honeysuckle eyes. He leaned forward and kissed her lips ever so softly, and ever so peacefully. When they broke apart after a brief second she immediately hugged him.

"Don't forget me, Harry," She said. "I love you; promise you'll love me… no matter what happens?" She asked.

"I promise." He said. "Promise me you'll never forget the countless hours we spent together… please?" He asked her.

"Never." She said. "They bring smiles to me face, knowing that the famous Harry Potter is not only a stud, but good in bed." She said with a hint of flirt.

"Shut up." He said as he kissed her cheek playfully.

"Alright, enough jokes." She sighed. "Time to get ready," She said. "Molly will mount our heads to the wall if we're late."

"Eww… why would she want our heads?" He said, disgusted with the subject.

"That was sarcasm Harry… _sarcasm_."

* * *

After a few long talks about what was going to happen when all this was over, they both agreed to keep a picture with them at all times and to find a way to communicate _besides_ owls. Everyone knew that that prison guards would hijack the mail and read them so they didn't tell about anything violent and such.

Ron had woken up when Hermione and Harry started a make-out session in the middle of the room. Before things got too serious, he had snuck out with a sneer on his face, knowing something neither of the other two knew. He just walked out, planning something in the depth of his twisted mind.

"ARE YOU READY YET?" Mrs. Weasley yelled up the stairs as her shrilled voice echoed through the stairway of the Burrow. "WE'RE GOING TO BE LATE!"

"Coming!" Hermione yelled back, as she kissed Harry one last time after their session of never ending ones. "Are you ready?" She asked.

"Hold on," He said. "Tell Molly I'll be down in a minute…" He said, trailing off and with a sigh.

"What do I look like… an _owl?_" She snipped in the teasing manner.

"If you're an owl, then that's going to be hard telling people about having sex with an owl and not being crazy." He said. "Well, it was a sexy owl…"

"I hate you." She said as he hit his arm with a smile.

"Not as much as I hate you!" He retorted back, with a large grin.

"What a great conversation to separate us." Hermione said.

"I…"

"YOU BETTER HURRY UP! WE HAVE TEN MINUTES TO GET THERE, AND THAT'S GOING TO TAKE A MIRACLE!" Mrs. Weasley shouted. "IF YOU AREN'T DOWN HERE IN THREE MINUTES THEN I'M COMING UP THERE AND DRAGGING YOU BY YOUR EARS!"

"We aren't Fred and George Mrs. Weasley," Hermione called down after she stepped out of the room and bent over the railing around the stairs. "We understand we're running late, but this is a good reason to be running late! This is the last chance we get to see Harry!"

"I know it's hard, but there's going to be hell to pay from the ministry if we are too late." Mrs. Weasley explained. "Those people are very senile about time."

"Ok… Harry said he'd…" She stopped.

"I said I'd come right away, and here I am." He scurried down the hall and the stairs; he was tailing Hermione by an inch or two.

"Alright, in the car… _now_." Mrs. Weasley said, in a tersely way.

It took them about ten minutes with Molly's horrific speed to reach the Ministry, and to go into the depths of it. They ran down the hall, breathless, with Hermione holding Harry's hand tightly. They reached the doors and Molly turned to face him, giving him directions.

"Alright." She said. "You are to walk in and sit in the chair. Like the previous year, this one will be a bit different, considering we have a new Minister."

"I'll be right outside, Harry," Hermione said as she kissed him. "Good luck." She kissed him once more before he pushed open the doors and entered the room, disappearing into the blue.

The room was quite bigger than what Harry had imagined. He walked forward, feeling the eyes of twenty or so people resting on him, and he recognized not a single one of them because they were all new to the ministry. Harry sat in the tatty leather chair in the middle of the room, and stared at plump man in the white wig in the large desk in front of him. Aside his left hand laid the gavel, and aside his right side stood his guard.

"State your name." He said in a bored manner.

"Harry Potter," He replied with a shiver of nervousness.

"Ah, yes, Harry Potter." He said. "First off, do you understand your charges that made you come here today?"

"Sir?" He asked, in a reply of misunderstanding him.

"Do you know why you were charged?" He asked, more powerfully, and making Harry feel rather stupid.

"Murder, but I don't know why it counts as murder." He said. "About Voldemort." Harry added, surprised he didn't hear a whisper or a shudder, though no one was afraid of the name now that he was dead.

"You did kill Tom Riddle, didn't you?" He asked.

"Yes, but my entire life I was told it was my duty to!" He fought back.

"You were told?"

"By countless people!" Harry whined as the judge surveyed him.

"Why would they tell you to commit a crime?" He asked.

"He was a damn evil man who killed anyone in his path. He killed my parents, my godfather, and he killed my happiness as a baby. I had a right to, but they told me to because I was the only one that was known to be strong enough to fight him, and win against him." Harry said.

"Overrule!" The judge shouted. "You are saying that you killed him for revenge on your parents?"

"No I…"

"Was he not even a human to you?" He glared.

"He w.."

"Did you feel like killing him all your life that you knew about him?"

"I…"

"Admit it!" The judge cursed.

"FINE! I wanted to kill him to make my fears and pain to stop, but the prophecy then came into my life, telling me it was my duty. You can not say it's not true, because that prophecy used to lie here within the building!" Harry warned.

"Interesting point Mr. Potter.." the judge said, trialing off. "You are aware that I am allowed to send you to Azkaban for no less then three years?" He asked.

"Yes, but I wasn't sure of how long. I'll say that I'm prepared, for I should have never obeyed what you and the rest of the wizarding world have brought me into." Harry said, crossing his arms.

"Are you saying that _we_ made you the killer?" A girl at the right of the judge asked.

She had long hair of a dark violet color that would shimmer. She reminded Harry of Tonks and that she used to dye her hair wacky colors for fun, but mostly for disguise. Harry looked at her; her pug nose drew up to her face like it was pinned. He sighed, trying to make her understand the truth.

"No, what I'm saying it even the past Ministers have urged me into this position, so it's not on peer pressure, but it's political too. I was told that the ministry's policy was to keep everyone safe from harm, but apparently I'm not allowed to do that." Harry growled.

"Did you know that insulting and mocking a court is a felony?" The judge asked quicker than ever.

"I'm sorry, but I don't understand why this is such a big deal!" Harry said, getting annoyed with all the conversations going on through-out the room.

"The current minister, who for some reason wants to be nameless, tells me to send you to prison for eleven years, though it's not his decision." The minister stated. "You do understand that it's his decision to give you a trial, but mine for your sentence?"

"Am I going away for longer?" He asked. "Yes, I understand."

"No, Mr. Potter, but I will sentence you with being locked away for three years in the infamous Azkaban." The Judge stated.

Harry's heart felt light, only three years! That wasn't long at all! Right before, though, the gavel hit the table top the doors had burst open. A stoutly man clunked in, suspending himself up by a cane, and waddled toward the judge. His grey hair slicked back and decent. The judge rolled his eyes at the man, before he said the words 'bring him in!' and the doors opened immediately.

"Ron?" Harry asked at the boy with fire red hair stepped inside the court room, feeling joyous with himself.

"What is the meaning of this news Mr…?" The Judge asked.

"My name is Ronald Weasley." He said, continuing his walk to the front. "I am here to tell you myself that Harry Potter is not who you find him to be." Ron said. Harry sat with confusion.

"Forget the circumlocution act!" The Judge snipped. "What is this news that is supposedly so great and wonderful?"

"He has brainwashed his girlfriend, so she can't remember the truth about what happened with Voldemort." Ron stated, clearly lying to Harry, but Ron seemed to be wooing the panel.

"How has he brainwashed her?" The Judged asked.

"Sorry your honor, but maybe brainwashing was a bit strong of a term, but he has put her under the spell that makes you forget things instantly. I know the rules, so I will not say the spell in court, for I have respect for it." He said, with a bow.

"Mr. Potter," He said, turning from the boy. "Is it true you did that?"

"Yes, but it's a reason I have no back up on." He said.

"And why is that?" The judge asked, surprised.

"Because I did it to him too." He said pointing to Ron. "I did it because something happened between them that she wanted to forget."

"What happened?" He asked, like Harry was stupid or something.

"Ron Weasley raped my girlfriend as I stood in the room, but then when I had sent him flying across the room he seemed to have been knocked out. Then I saved my girlfriend from the chains he tangled her in, and attempted to remove her from the scene." Harry said.

"LIAR!" Ron shouted, appalled.

"Of course it seems like a lie to you… YOU were put under the spell too!" Harry sneered.

"ORDER!" The Judge yelled as the room instantly quieted down. "Are you familiar with the Minister's new rules Mr. Potter?" He asked.

"No, sir, I'm afraid I'm not." Harry said truthfully.

"Under section three of code four it states that no magical folk under the age of twenty one should be able to magic unless it's strictly for defense." The judge said.

"Ha!" Ron said, pointing at Harry. "_I'm_ familiar it those rules." Ron said proudly.

"Anyway," The judge said. "I sentence you, Mr. Potter, with no less than ten years in Azkaban prison." The gavel hit.

"But I'm innocent!" he retorted. "I'm innocent."

"GUARDS, TAKE HIM AWAY!" The Judge yelled.

"I'm innocent…" Harry yelled. "Stay away from me! I don't belong there!"

"GUILTY!"

"He's the rapist, he should be sent away! I'm innocent I tell you… INNOCENT!"

Hermione ran into the room with tears in her eyes as she watched them take the man she loved away from her. She looked like a mother who had recently lost a child. When Harry calmed down, he mouthed the words to her, and she had responded with tears filling her eyes like a water fall.

'I'm-sorry' Hermione mouthed.

'I'm-innocent-Hermione-I-don't-belong-there!" He mouthed.

She covered her face and cried into the sleeves of her coat. She watched them pull him out the door with force as she felt like running after him, but Ron was holding her back, but then Harry caught her eyes again. She had made one last motion towards him and began to mouth words again. In one short breath she had verbally said the words that he was searching for.

"I know."

**

* * *

Author's Note:**

**The title of this chapter is a bit misleading huh? Well, this I think was one of my best. Sorry that I wrote about going to the Ministry so bluntly and badly, but my descriptions are most of the time boring, and I didn't want to bore you. I might not be updating in two weeks, but I'll try _really_ hard if I get ten reviews. Lol. Well, until next time… if there is one… I might be extremely busy next week with work and all. See you soon!**

**Airalynn**

**To My Reviewers**

**Froboy – **Here ya are, intense chapter I must say, but I hope you enjoy!

**call me brit – **Nope, I'm turning sixteen in February, so you're good… lol. Happy Belated Fourteenth Birthday! Ron's death would make you happy? Woah, you must still think that after this chapter!

**toga party – **How long do you have to live? Lol. Do you think you could have survived another week? Happy Birthday to you too, how old are _you?_ Please tell me younger than sixteen… just kidding.

**Sarah – **You reviewed chapter one again, but it doesn't matter chicka, they all add up! Looks like I have ten after all, and I would probably kill it if it wasn't for my "fans." Love you oh so much, and see you later!

**PrincessLuckCML – **Wanna know something creepy that I just noticed? The last three letters of your pen name is my initials. Haha, Chelsea-May-Law, that's so creepy! Sorry to hear about your internet, but the payment thing is about me and my friend need your help with pictures from your hometown. We are writing a book, and we are going to have the setting in either Clearwater, or St. Pete. We are specifically looking for a house that is extremely close to the beach. Is there anything like that in Clearwater?

**missradcliffe – **They are keeping a low profile, but that thing was wrong with Ron. I found the poetic speaking to be a nice touch, because it's like shocking sort of, but cool anyhow. Thanks for reviewing twice; it means a lot to me!

**That's all, until next time folks!**

**UPDATED: (SATURDAY) OCTOBER 29, 2005 – I'd like to say: Happy Birthday to Robert Hardy, who played the roles of Cornelius Fudge, from The Chamber of Secrets and Prisoner of Azkaban. Wish 'im a happy one with me! (Was he in the Sorcerer's Stone? I can't remember?**


	11. Chapter Eleven: Raping Royalty

**Chapter Eleven:**

**Raping Royalty**

Hermione sat in the court room, acting as if nothing ever happened. She knew in the depth of her heart that if she thought about it, it would tear her apart. She wanted to think that it was about to happen and she still had time, but she didn't. He was being locked away for ten years, and she couldn't do anything about it. The judge, who watched her with sadness, looked at her as she cried in the empty courtroom.

"Miss, are you lost?" He asked after quite some time of waiting to see if she was leaving.

"No… no." She sniffled. "You just sent my fiancé to jail for something he didn't really do." She said. "I don't want to leave yet."

"He admitted he put you under a spell, and that's illegal miss, unless it's defense." He said and Hermione looked up at him.

"How do you know it really wasn't defense? Maybe you should try looking into his mind to see the whole story. Don't judge him by what he says, see for yourself. Why can't you do that?" She asked.

"It's not a bad idea, but I doubt as stubborn as Mr. Potter is that he'd agree to it." He said.

"It's his freedom, he'd agree to it." She said. "Why do you have to be so hard? He's only seventeen, and he specifically said he wasn't familiar with the rules."

"I'm just doing my job Miss," He stopped.

"My name is Hermione, sir, Hermione." She said acidly.

She watched him get down from the stands, and noticed that he was a bit short for the usual adults. He was about a foot shorter than her, and she was one of the shortest in her class. His stubby legs happen to be what was in her staring point, and she felt sort of bad for him. She didn't know exactly why, but people must really make fun of him. The world is so cruel to people who are different. She would know about that, growing up being muggleborn.

"Hermione? It's such a pretty name for such a pretty girl." He said.

"Sir, please don't try and cheer me up. Especially, after you took my whole world away from me minutes before." She said.

"How about I make you a deal?" He sighed. "Since you said he's your fiancé and you're absolutely right about not knowing the truth."

"Alright," She sighed. "What's the deal?" She asked, chewing on her bottom lip.

"I will go to Azkaban tomorrow, and you will assist me my dear. We will find out the truth, and if we get his permission then we can enter his mind. If what he said about your 'Ronald' friend is false he will stay with the ten year lock up, but if it's true then we'll let him pass with only a four year sentence." He said.

"Why four?" She asked.

"Because he did the spell in general, and it wasn't exactly defense. It would be on your behalf, but not on his." He said.

"That's ridiculous!" She said. "He saved my life… I think." She whined.

"Then we'll save his, before that place shreds a good man apart." He winked, and quickly Hermione had hugged the judge.

"I feel like I somehow know you." She said.

"Why do you say that?" He wondered.

"My, er-, father passed away this summer in an accident, and ever since people have been overly nice about everything. Though, you in general seem to remind me of my father himself."

* * *

Hermione sat in the kitchen at the burrow and watched part of her food roll across the plate in boredom. She sighed, with a slit of tear in her eyes, as she watched everyone else around her eating like normal. It was like nothing ever happened, but hopefully by the next morning she would feel a bit better by knowing that Harry was actually telling the truth and the judge made a mistake.

Her mind was set on knowing that Harry was telling the truth, but since she was put under the spell she couldn't _really_ tell if he was lying or not. She was absorbed into her thoughts with no intention of her surroundings. She sighed and stared at her plate with a glare towards the pile of potatoes. She was swirled into a dreamland, with clouds around her in every direction and she danced in her frilly, lace wedding gown with Harry beside her. They were dancing, under the golden lights and fake snow all around as she laughed in pure happiness.

"Hermione!" Mrs. Weasley snapped and Hermione's fork went whizzing in the air, hearing an owl practically choke on its food. She looked up.

"WHAT?" She asked hastily, getting put back in the mess of reality. Everyone at the table stared at her. "Sorry, Mrs. Weasley, may I be excused?" She begged.

"Of course dear," She said as she watched Hermione ascend up the stairs. She watched her disappear and Mrs. Weasley returned to her vision on the plate in front of her. "Poor dear, so much has happened to her." Molly said sadly.

"I know dear, it's been hard for all of us." Arthur said as he glared intently at his son that sat across the table. "While we're on the subject, Ron, would you care to explain why you did what you did?" He asked in anger and putting in a noise of dislike when saying the name.

"I don't have to answer that." Ron battled back and Arthur's face became commenced with red hot anger.

"You told your mother you had proof he was innocent, and we hear to find that you told them he did a spell and _you_ send him to prison?" Arthur said. "I thought I raised you better Ronald Bilius Weasley!" He growled.

"He's the one who attacked her with a spell! What if he killed her by accident!" Ron asked in defense.

"The point is he didn't Ron!" Molly joined in. "He would never hurt Hermione, because he loves her. You don't have to be jealous of them Ron! I'm sure you'll find a girlfriend too, but you can't trammel others to get it! That's not how it works!"

"It's also incredibly appalling treating love like that!" Arthur said.

"Like what? Like how it really is? At least _I'm_ not the one who Hermione lost her virginity to!" Ron snipped.

"I can not believe the words that are coming out of your mouth Ronald! Hermione has done no such thing!" Molly glared.

"Wanna bet? Why don't you ask her yourself?" He asked, standing up.

"That's it Ron! You're done with supper, and you are to stay in your room until you apologize to your mother, and Hermione from bringing her into this!" Arthur growled. "Go, NOW!" He pointed to the stairs.

"But…"

"I SAID NOW!" Arthur said grabbing his sweater sleeve and pushing him towards the stairs. "You have brought disgrace to the table, I hope you understand that."

Ron, with anger, fled to the stairs while kicking each stair while he walked up them. In hoping of breaking something valuable to remove his anger, he continued. He reached the tenth step, and with four to go, his foot started to hurt, but he didn't care. He just walked up the stairs and walked down the hall, stomping his feet in hoping to stall his way to his room.

He heard heavy breathing and panting as he turned the corner and came to a door that was opened slightly. He peeked into the room and saw Hermione lying on the bed, covered in tears, and her head face down into a pillow. She cried whole heartedly as she whispered to herself the words: 'I love you Harry, I'll gladly take your place.' Ron shook his head.

"I know you're there." Hermione said, turning her head the opposite direct of the door.

"I figured that." He said.

"Do you think I'm stupid or something?" She asked, offended.

"No, never Hermione, I would never think you were stupid." He comforted.

"You just thought you could mention about me having sex with Harry to your parents and walk away with it?" She asked. "Did you think I wouldn't find out? What else did you tell them? I have yet to here about our engagement." Hermione sniffed. She said each line fast and with a raised voice.

"I'm sorry Hermione, things slip out my mouth when I become mad. I didn't mean to hurt you more than I have done already, but don't get me wrong because I had no intention of hurting you in the first place." He said sadly.

"Why did you send him away, Ron, why have you caused me this loss of life?" She asked, rather dramatically.

"If he hurt you, I have no idea what I would have done." Ron said. He walked part way across the room and sat at the side of her bed.

"NO!" Hermione resisted. A memory traced her thought. "I remember what happened last time. Harry and I had a fight and you came in wanting to comfort me and you kissed me, and touched me, and… Harry was telling the truth Ron! You're nothing but a monster." She said, easing up from her bed. "Leave me alone, tomorrow I'll be going to Courthouse and I'll set Harry free and you will be put in his place! You disgusting pig!" She glowered.

"Hermione, you're talking crazy talk, I wouldn't ever do that to you." He said. "You must trust me I am, but a friend of yours. A _close_ friend of yours." He said maliciously.

"Stay… Stay away from me." She muttered.

"Hermione, dear, calm down. I would do no such thing. You can't push me away, when I love you. I love you more than the world itself." He smiled.

"NO!" She protested. "I love Harry, I'd never love you!" She said backing to the wall. He was walking closer to her.

"Come on, Hermione," He said. "Harry is a criminal, but I am free and here for you." He said with an evil grin he walked so close to her that his body touched her. She didn't dare move.

"Don't do this… you're insane." She said. "You have no idea what is happening to yourself do you?" She asked.

"Oh, I know what's happening." He said flirtatiously. He pressed to her hard as a stiff item was plunged against her leg. She screeched.

"Ronald stop it!" She said. "I hate you, I'd never love you. You sick vile bastard!" She growled.

She closed her eyes tightly, hoping this would never happen in her wildest dreams, and she felt him grab her. Like iron caskets clinging against her breasts, she felt she was suffocating to death. He clutched hard and pinched the ends with greed as she tried pushing him away. He smiled and pushed his head toward hers, but purposely missing her lips, his mouth reached her ear.

"I remember everything that happened. He thought he put me on the spell, but there is a secret I have behind it." He whispered. "I attempted to rape you, but I didn't make it as far as I'd liked to. So here I am, unable to be stopped. The room with a soundproof spell and the door locked. And I, my dear, are going to make your dreams come true." He said.

Her eyes grew wide with terror as she attempted to run from the scene, but he noticed she was resisting he gave her more force as he pulled her from the wall, and pushed her onto the bed. She screamed, but like he said: the room was soundproof. She tried her best to fight, but he clutched her so hardly she felt bruises form and fire run through out her body as he moved her.

He sat on top of her, stripping her of clothing as he once again smirked. Chains came from the bars of the bed like snakes and held her down. They pulled her wrists as far apart as possible and her legs parted slightly. She bit her lip as she tried to fight back, but she didn't have enough energy to do what she wanted. He bent down and carefully laid a kiss on her lips.

"This is for you Princess." He said, and she felt disgusted by the term that one usually hears for endearment. "You'll always be my Princess." And that word would be the one she would fear forever.

"Ron, I said no! Why can't you understand that?" She begged, tears in her eyes.

"Because, I crave your body." He said with a lick of the lips. "I've had wet dreams of ravishing you since I was eleven, and you instead turned around and fucked Potter. Well, not anymore Princess, I'm the only one that does that to you." He said.

"Let me go!" She yelled. "Go to hell you ass!"

He ignored her as he played with her breasts some more. She cringed at the pain and uncomfortably fidgeted when he move his fingers down her body. Her short shirt stopped right above her waist, and then he had taken a knife from the drawer. She at first thought he was going to kill her when he placed the metal against her skin, but she was wrong. He pushed it up to the collar of her shirt and sliced straight down.

The two flaps of fabric bellowed in the soft mellow wind that was blowing in the room that was almost unnoticeable. He flipped each side open, revealing a contraption of lace that held in her body. He bent forward once again, unsnapping the snaps that were at the top, and they fell to her sides. She tried to scream once again, but once again no one had heard her.

"Don't you fucking touch me you pig!" She cussed. "Get the hell off of me and let me go!" she demanded.

"Oh, like this?" He asked as he grabbed the round tips and twisted them to the right as he pinched them hard. She cried out in pain.

"Stop, it hurts!" She cried.

"Exactly, are you going to tell me to stop again, _Princess?_" He asked, but she couldn't take it anymore, she cried.

"No," She cringed and he had released her.

"That's a good girl." He smiled and thought for a bit. "Now, what shall we do with you?" He asked.

He traced fingers down her body, and she felt blood pump in her with rage. He had placed his mouth upon her breasts and were nibbling on them. She couldn't help, but moan, though she didn't like it. Then a plate had formed over her mouth, like before, and she began to go mad with fear. She couldn't talk.

She felt like someone who was claustrophobic in a small box. She began to flip out, her situation was bad before, but she felt even worse now. Then when Ron looked up, the plate had disappeared. She sighed in relief and she dropped her head back down to the pillow.

"Besides, I wouldn't be able to kiss you." He said as he did so. She drew her mouth away in disgust. "Well, fine then, I have something better later." He smiled.

She felt something bad approaching. He dragged his hands down her bruised breasts and across her stomach. His finger then came across the waistline of her jeans. He slowly kissed her lower stomach as he cut the jeans from her legs. He then cut the sides of the last piece of clothing that shielded her. He looked at her with greed in his eyes once again.

"Don't… please…" She whispered, but it was too late.

His mouth had hit between her legs and his fingers were crawling up inside her. She moaned as he devoured her with his tongue. She felt him stop for a brief minute when she heard a zipping noise, but she was afraid to look at what this man was doing. Something rock solid rubbed against her, and then, suddenly, it crammed inside her.

She screamed, with tears in her eyes, the pain was worse than before. She never thought it would be this bad. She tried to resist, and it hurt even more as she tightened herself. He slid inside her, without a word, and as far as he could. She tried pulling herself up, and away from him, but the chains had her glued. He pulled out, and then crammed back in as she cried in pure agony.

"Why are you doing this?" She cried, but no answer. "You sick bastard, burn in hell fucker!" She cussed. He stopped suddenly.

"_Oh,_ you're a naughty Princess, aren't you?" He asked. "Do you know what royalty gets babe?" He wondered.

"Freedom?" She said hopefully. He smirked.

"Nice try, but not quite. Open your mouth a little, please?" He asked as he stood and walked towards her, his genitals flopping in her sight with abhorrence. She shook her head.

He had a wicked smile on her face as he extended his hand and struck her across the face with fury. She cried, but refused once again to open her mouth. She was slapped again as a handprint formed on her right cheek. He tried once again and when he gave up with the hitting, he returned to the twisting. He pinched her breasts again and twisted them further, and she had forgotten what kept her mouth closed. It had fell open with a scream, and he smiled.

He picked himself up and shoved himself into her mouth, causing her to gag. He growled as he instructed her, but she denied it. She would do nothing, and she had to get the taste out of her mouth. He struck her once more, and then she followed his instructions. In her mind she was thinking different thoughts, and maybe if she followed his directions he would leave sooner.

"Come on baby, you can suck harder than that." He growled.

"Elek…" She said as she began gagging again. When he moved a little higher, she took a deep breath.

"You thought I was actually going to gag you to death huh?" He asked. "Tisk tisk Princess," He said "I know something you'll like instead of sucking." He smiled.

"You getting off me would be nice." She snipped. "You've done enough, leave me alone!" She growled.

"You see, I can't do that." He smiled evilly. "Once I do so, you'll go blabbing. So I need to get my worth out somehow."

"Wh… what's happening?" She asked as she felt him cram inside her again between her legs. She found her answer, as an explosion occurred inside her. He smiled.

"There, now I feel a whole lot better." He smiled. "I will go now, but first I have a few words for you." He picked up the knife that he had cut her clothing off with and set it to her throat and with vicious words he spoke: "Tell anyone, especially your precious fiancé, and I will kill you. I am the only one you love."

She was afraid to move, and afraid to talk after hearing such words come from his mouth. When he had gotten fully dressed, he blew her a kiss and walked out the door. As soon as the door shut everything had disappeared. The chains, the knife, the scent, and the soundproof in the room. She could hear Ron in the hallway telling his mom he apologized and is ready for dinner.

Hermione, quicker than a rabbit, jumped from her bed and ran into the bathroom, not even bothering to dress. She stepped in the shower, attempting to wash his filth from her, and when she finished she dressed in new clothes, fixing her old ones so it didn't look conspicuous, she dressing in dark clothing to hide herself. She felt like people could see what had happened.

She peeked out the door, and when no one was in sight, she ran down the hall. She didn't care if she ran into something or not. She placed a lock on the door of the room she entered and faced Harry's bedroom. Where they had made love the first time, and she enjoyed it. Now it was nothing but a joke. She crawled into his sheets in hoping to melt into it and find herself with him some how. His scent was everywhere.

She stared at the ceiling with a look of sadness and a hint of madness in her eyes. She reached to the side, remembering Harry's moves, and she opened his drawer. There was the glass he harmed himself with, in the open and usable. She hugged it, feeling the streams of hardened blood along the no longer see-through glass wedge. She cried to herself as she hugged it.

Every memory came back to her. The fight, the kitchen, the love and everything in between. When she found Harry loved her, she thought it was the best thing in the world, but now it's nothing but freedom. She loved him, and his love to her was the only thing that kept her safe. It was the only thing that let her sleep at night, and it was the only thing that made her smile. She would give anything to have him be with her again, and so she decided tomorrow she would write her first letter, hopefully…

Never did she think she would be doing this, but she didn't have another choice. She picked it up and brought it across her wrist as a seep of pain was mixed with the gushing blood from her wrist. Then she cut her forearm, hoping to get use to it. Then she did it again, cringing with every swipe, and she found herself back in Harry's position. She fell back, her head to the pillow, and took a deep breath as her arm fell to the side. Her hand tilted over the side of the bed.

"I'm sorry… Harry…" The glass had fallen to the floor.

**Author's Note:**

**Alright, WHAT A WEEK! This probably sounds kinda bad, but I wrote this when I was sick so sorry about what ever you don't like about it. For some reason I love this title, don't you? **

**Now I couldn't believe it when I found that last week I had twenty reviews in one week, and I know that I promised you a chapter in exactly a week, instead of skipping one, but I didn't have one ready when I got the twenty, SO I'm making you a deal. **

**THIS IS FOR EVERYONE TO ANSWER. SO PLEASE DO SO! THANK YOU!**

**I'm giving you a choice, and I want you to think HARD about it. Here are your options:**

**1. Over my Thanksgiving break I will write two chapters (meaning skipping this week) and post one that Saturday than another the next Saturday. (The 26th and the 3rd)**

**2. I am giving you a contest. I will give you a question at the end of my next chapter (chapter twelve) and if you answer it correctly here is what you win: I will get an exclusive interview with you and write you a short story exactly how you want it, dedicate it to you, and practically give it to you. The problem is, it'll take about a month.**

… **It's your choice… In an empty space in your review write the number "1" or "2"**

**Airalynn**

**To My Reviewers: **

**Sarah – **Oh come on! Spelling errors? EVERYONE MAKES THOSE! You even did so in your review… am I right people?

**call me brit – **Oh, wow, you'll probably fricken flip after this chapter if you did the last one. I'm kind of scared to receive it. –shivers-

**TheOneAndOnlyBarry – **Th… Thank you! I hope this chapter pleases you, I love when I get new fans… if it's alright to call you a fan. Haha, thanks so much for reviewing!

**Lokota-Jones – **I know Ron sucks ass, it's pretty inconspicuous. Haha. NOT! If you are confused on something I can help you with it… you're saying this doesn't make sense? Hmm, why is that?

**missradcliffe – **I'm good, aren't I? You know you love me! –dances-

**No Name – **Oh, no, you're making it sound like my story is over. NOT YET! Please stay tuned! Lol.

**Goddess of the heart – **Define A-S-A-P, because that could be NEVER! Hahaha, I'm so evil.

**togaparty – **Yup, I was actually Hermione for Halloween. –smile smile- You can't get bitchy! You would have been already at that point in time that I didn't update for like three weeks cause I forgot to. Hehe. And the sixteen thing is because I'm turning sixteen in February. I always feel special when I'm older.

**Froboy – **You have good points about these thing, how come you have never authored any stories? I'd _gladly_ read them!

**That's all, I expect answers!**

_**5 DAYS TILL GOBLET OF FIRE IS RELEASED TO THEATERS!**_

**UPDATED: (SATUDAY) NOVEMBER 12, 2005 – I have 3 Birthday Wishes!**

**1. **Happy Belated Birthday to **Chris Rankin** who plays the current role of **Percy Weasley. **His Birthday: **8th**

**2. **Happy Belated Birthday to **Brendan Gleeson **who we shall soon see in Goblet of Fire as **Mad-Eye** **Moody**. His Birthday: **9th**

**3. **Happy Almost Birthday to **Alfonso Cuaron **who **Directed Prisoner of Azkaban** and did an AWSOME job! –claps- His Birthday: **28th**


	12. Chapter Twelve: Stranger

**Chapter Twelve:**

**Stranger**

It wasn't seeing the blood that made her pass out exactly, but instead the overwhelming shock of being raped. She didn't know what to say, what to do, where to go, or even how to act. She couldn't run to Harry, he was gone, and she needed to accept that for now while he was there. She couldn't try and get him out of there, because fighting with the Ministry would only screw her life up more, but she insisted she'd rather be in jail then here having this done to her.

She had no idea what to do at a time like this, for it was morning and she was completely covered in dry blood and bruises. Her breasts had sharp prangs in them every few minutes, and yet, she didn't want to remember what happened. She just let them bring her the pain and tried as hard as she could to completely ignore it all. Even though the pain wouldn't leave, something else was keeping her from pushing these memories into the back of her head.

The last thing that she would ever say is that she enjoyed it, for it was vile and completely repulsive. She grasped the sheets with all her might, and before she knew it she was talking to herself, as if reciting a poem. Though, she herself didn't know what she was saying, for it didn't sound like something she'd say, but she was saying it… like it meant more than the world, more than life, more than… Harry.

"_Why am I here oh present moon, as the light shines overhead. I don't understand those who do these unworthy deeds, but it's my fault it was lead. May you listen to me shout to the skies, for I know not who I talk to. Why dost thou act as if this is important, why does it destroy lives too? What does this prove? Listen to me, oh faithful one, and answer me for I here I shall be._"She covered her eyes. "_Let spirits of the dead steal my soul and devour it with a kiss, for I have no reason to live. I'll be waiting for you to come for me, but I shake with wretched beast-like nails, as I claw my way out of this box I've put myself into. At first I thought it was all I dream, but then I realized that all I along I knew._"

Without meaning to cause anything but meaning towards he words, she suddenly heard a loud, dripping noise. Like a never-ending shower of nails upon a chalkboard, and when she look to her side she found it raining. The window creaking open and shut as she lay in the pitch black madness of the scene. She tossed and turned, not even realizing the nasty pain in her arm, but did nothing but lay there, soaking in the heat. Something about this night sacred her, and scared her practically to death.

She closed her eyes, and in a lovesick manner she began missing Harry's presence. Though she would see him soon, for she was to meet the Judge at Azkaban, she had no intention of missing him as much as she did right now. If he were here, none of this would have happened. It would be a usual common last Saturday till school. School started on a Sunday this year, so therefore when she was done with the Judge she would be shipped back to Hogwarts to resume her post.

Hermione raised herself from the bed that she loved, yet hated so much it made her sick. She loved it, because that's where her and Harry had expressed their love, but again she hated it because he would never be by her side again. Why had they fought those two days of their shot time together? Something could have sparked in those two days so that she wouldn't feel so lonely without him. Maybe he could have fought the Ministry, and maybe he could have won. The clock struck 6 am.

The pitch black, blued, and misty sky looked it's usual after a rainstorm: nasty. The sky was mixed as the colors faded away softly into a gentle grayish color and a silver lining upon each individual cloud that hung over head like the moon. The moon was there, but slowly it began disappearing behind the gray sky. She couldn't help but think her vision became a bit foggy too, but she ignored her desire to fall asleep once again and sat up, holding the sheets to her like a shield.

Those words he had said swam in her head about how she was his princess, and he was her prince. It made her sick to just think about the possibilities of them being together for eternity. She loved Harry, more than the world itself, and for some reason she always knew that nothing could keep them together. For it was love they experienced in those few days, but it was something so stupid that pulled them right apart again. What was she thinking; when she told herself that she would spend the rest of her life with the wonderful, popular, and famous Harry Potter? This was nothing but a game.

She raised herself from the bed, searching the room for clothes, and settled with a normal pair of jeans and a light blue sweater. The sleeves were stretched out into a bell shape, where she _abnormally_ hid her wand inside. She would be meeting the Judge soon enough and they together would save him. They would put Ron away, and then… Harry would be free. Harry would be here, by her side, but what scared her most was what would he say to her if he found out Ron had successfully raped her when he was in jail?

Would he call her a weakling practically for not being able to stop him, when truth-be-told Harry couldn't either? When he returned what exactly would his expression be towards her and him? Would this start a war between the families when she never intended it to? What would he think when she eventually told him? The one question though that lingered in her mind like a fear was: would she even tell him what happened and the truth to it?

During the night she had received a note from the Judge to meet him at the Ministry at 7 o'clock, am, sharp. She would not tell Molly where she was going, but she left a note on the bed that said she wouldn't be back and that she went somewhere and she'd catch the train by herself. Not knowing if Molly would understand, she left it without any more words. Then she raised her hands as the clock struck 6:55 am, and she was whizzed away without two words.

She had her eyes closed because she usually got dizzy from everything swishing by her so quickly it made her sick to her stomach. She felt her feet hit the ground where she opened her eyes and stared at the phone booth in front of her. She stepped inside as the "Out of Order" sign vanished. She put in the code with a small hassle with the order of the numbers, but she managed to get to it after a few tries. A lady came on the speaker with a prissy/charming tone to her voice.

"Please state your name." She said.

"Hermione Jane Granger." She said sharply, wanting to be on time.

"What is your purpose?" She asked a little offended, but she continued to listen to her with patience.

"I am here for a Scheduled meeting with Judge Day and a trip to Azkaban." She said boringly. "The time of meet is 7 am." She stated once more.

"Correctly stated," The woman said. "Take your badge from the slot and you may resume to your meeting." Hermione took her badge. "Good luck." She said.

Hermione said a light thanks before she was lowered into the depth of the Ministry itself. It had been precisely two years since she had actually done this, and she didn't miss it at all. Whatever were they thinking while being so young? She shook her head, for back then was filled with nothing but fear, problems, love, heartache, and stupidity. That's all that got her to be who she is now, but somewhere in that predicament she had to thank all that happened, because she honestly enjoyed her life… until now.

What ever had she done to deserve this pain that she had been unmistakably cursed to death with? Why was it her and not someone like Ms. Perfect Pansy Parkinson? What about that twit? Who would have thought her and Malfoy would make it all the way through 6th year. That's what made her sick to her stomach… Pansy… Malfoy… eh, she couldn't even imagine what their kids would look like with bleach-blond hair and pug noses with snappy attitudes.

Hermione had always wondered why they were still together when Malfoy had found out a horribly secret about her. Last summer he found that she was, in fact, a half blood and the Malfoy family only ran of pure bloods. She was a dead-end in the chain link of the family, and everyone was surprised he didn't just turn her away. Hermione thought it was her cunning that made him stick to her so, love between them was nothing but a joke, and them together was like eating a snake and mustard sandwich… malevolent.

She walked down the tainted wood and maroon halls as she made her way across the Ministry, clipping her badge to her shoulder. She walked forward, giving her wand to the man at the desk, and walked past without any words or actions that needed to be given or told about. She just walked, but curiously it seemed that the halls were all but one person empty. Was there a meeting in action, and why was there no one in the halls but body guards and security wizards? It didn't make sense.

"Hermione!" She heard a voice call. "Oy, Hermione, over here!" It shouted again. She turned sharply on her heal and faced the voice.

There was the man she was looking for. The plump, short man that she met in the Courthouse and she had formally introduced herself to him at that time was walking straight at her. She smiled slightly at the thought of what was going to happen next and where they were going. Hermione, with her luggage sitting beside her, waved gently to the judge as she nodded her head. She smiled graciously and gave him a thanking smile as she stepped in front of her bags.

"You can leave those here." He said. "We'll get them back to you at the train station." He promised and she nodded.

"How are we going to the prison?" She wondered. "I mean, with all the Dementors there, how are we going to get past?" The Judge laughed a little.

"The Dementors have been gone for months, Dear," He laughed. "We're going on Thestrals."

"Oh," She said sadly. "If only I hadn't seen my cousin die at birth." She said. "Then I would be grateful for not being able to see them."

"Its okay, Hermione," He reassured. "I've seen more people die than you could even imagine."

She wasn't sure if that was supposed to be taken as a happy comment or a depressing one, because his expression sort of gave her mixed signals. Before Hermione even realized it, she was settled on a Thestral and riding out into the late sunrise with the Judge on another at her side. She looked over to him as he began yelling across to her in the orange and pink smothered sky. She listened intently to his directions, but she found it difficult to look at him _and_ the direction she was going.

"Ok, we're going to come to an opened bridge where we'll enter, but be careful of the sphinxes around the castle. They can be a bit vicious." He warned. "You're wand less so that's what your biggest downfall is at the moment. It's hard keeping track of those filthy creatures, because you never know exactly where they are." He laughed.

"Where are we going to find Harry?" She yelled back, distracting her horse a little.

"We'll be guided by the Jail Guards there. You have to be careful though, they can be a little touchy around visitors." He warned again. "They aren't every trusting people."

"I know." She said. "I've run into them before, but it was at the Ministry, not Azkaban. I've actually never been to the actually Jail, but I was planning on never going anyway because it's not exactly a happy place, but Harry's in trouble." She said.

"Why are you so worried about him and how many years he serves?" The Judge asked curiously. "Just because you know he's innocent?"

"That and I love him." She said. "More than the world itself, but this place is not for him. You have the wrong man." She stated clearly talking of Ron.

"Is that all, because there's something about you Hermione that seems like this is more than love and innocence. What else are you here for?" He wondered and she sighed. "You are poised to his life, are you not?"

"Yes!" She said. "Look… I have to save him, because…" She paused with a sigh. "I owe him."

She saw the Jail coming into the clearing, and such a horrific place it seemed to be. It was darkened with gray clouds as chains hung from the metal bars. People watching them coming in through the small slits between the bars, and their only source of light available to them. The chains dangled from a phantom breeze that lingered over the jail like a cloud. She gasped at the sight she saw, for this was horrible. What had they done to her fiancé?

She pushed forward on her horse when she had seen a large wooden door fall to the ground to form a bridge. She felt her horse land on the sandy beach and galloped to the front of the bridge. She looked at the guards with fear as their hands were covered with leather and whips glued to their hands like a knife. She blinked with enlighten and waited patiently for the Judge to join her at her side. He came into view and his horse had successfully got him there.

He quickly told her to follow him, and together their horses slowly walked along the bridge. The Judge had stated their names and purposes of why they were there and when they were leaving. One of the four guardsmen began leading as they left their horses with another one. The tall iron doors were side by side as each one was occupied with a criminal, though one, somewhere, was occupied with a hero. No one might have believed it, but Hermione believed it full heartedly.

"Who are you looking for, again?" The guard barked at them, Hermione turned her eyes upon his leather covered head.

"Potter." She said sharply. "How much further is it?" She asked, starting to get impatient.

"Two floors and three doors left." He barked.

Hermione got a chill as sounds of moaning, screaming, and crying came from the halls. She heard crack sounds from whips and slaps. She growled. Is this what they were doing to Harry? Is this what they did to everyone that was here? Even if they were guilty, this was completely unnecessary. This was horrible the way they were treating them, and she swore if they lay even one finger on Harry then she'd get back at them as vile as she could possibly think of.

They came to a large metal door with the numbers "_6625_" carved along the outside by the hinges that it rested on. She gulped slightly as he announced that this was indeed Harry's cell, but when he opened the door the sight had broke her heart in pieces. He had more scars upon his body, tears in his eyes, and he was chained the wall without being able to move his hands apart. His head hung low with tears of knowing he had to be strong, but he couldn't hold in the pain.

Her heart was heavy as she felt it shatter within her chest and her hands had instantly covered her mouth as she cupped it and her nose inside her hands. Her eyes filled with tears of sadness and unbelief about what had happened. She couldn't look at him without feeling his pain and crying for him. She stepped forward, into the only light source, and revealed herself to him. She cried into her hands. What had they done to him and what had he done to deserve it?

"Hermione?" He asked with a bit of uplift in his voice.

"Harry," She cried as she ran to him with a hug. "What have they done to you?" She asked wrapping her arms safely around his neck.

"It's alright," He gave her a light smile. "It honestly doesn't hurt anymore." He reassured, but she didn't want to believe him. "Please don't cry." He asked.

"I can't help it." She said. "They shouldn't be doing this… this is absolutely preposterous!" She cried, kissing him on the lips.

"Hermione," He said as she turned her head back to him. "I've missed you even though it has only been one day. I don't think I can last ten years." He said stirringly as he laid his head on her shoulder.

"You might not have to wait that long, as long as we get your permission to look inside your mind." She said.

"_We_?" Harry asked with confusion. "Ron isn't here… I hope." He said with a hint of anger flashing inside his green eyes.

"No, not after what had…" She got a flashback.

"_I will go now, but first I have a few words for you." He picked up the knife that he had cut her clothing off with and set it to her throat and with vicious words he spoke: "Tell anyone, especially your precious fiancé, and I will kill you. I am the only one you love."_

"After what?" Harry asked with worry.

"It's nothing." She insisted. "Just he was most happy with you being gone. That's all." She said.

"Hermione," Harry sighed. "I hope you know that you're the worst liar in the world." He laughed.

"I just can't tell you…" She said. "Or time will grow most short."

"Wh…" He was cut off.

Harry looked to the door as the plump man entered in the doorway and stood in the center of the light. He looked a bit annoyed with just getting done with talking to the guard, but Hermione gave him a smile, trusting he could save Harry. Harry, though, looked at him with betray, for he was the man to put him away for so long, but he would do anything just to stay with Hermione for the rest of his life. He bowed his head with sadness as the Judge looked at him with an understanding gleam within his blue eyes.

"Good morning Mr. Potter." He said with a saddened voice.

"Good morning Mr. Day." He responded with a light sigh escaping his lips. Hermione hugged him closer. "Why are you both here?" He asked.

"I came across Ms. Granger the night of your trial where she had told me something that I never actually thought of myself. She said the only real way to find out the truth would be to open your mind to us, but we need your permission." He said. Hermione smiled.

"This could get years off your sentence Harry!" Hermione said happily.

"What's the catch?" Harry asked. "What exactly are you looking for?" He wondered.

"Everything that happened that night, for it will be written in a record." He said and Hermione and Harry both gulped. Them having sex would be… would be… _recorded_?

They looked at each other for a moment; both with a bit of embarrassment in their eyes, but they both pushed it aside. Harry looked up to the light after gently nuzzling his head against Hermione's cheek and then returned to his vision on the Judge. He nodded his permission and the Judge raised his wand. He warned that it might be painful at first, but in the end it should be alright. Harry closed his eyes tightly and then it came. The Judge's wand pointed directly at him.

"_Legilimens,_" He said and Harry's mind opened like a book.

It seemed like hours before the Judge was completely satisfied. He looked at Harry with amazement and then analyzed Hermione with disappointment. At that age? It seemed too sad to have them experience that, but he turned to the guard and sighed. He was still in a bit of a shocking stage when he had begun to speak. The guard listened carefully beneath the think layer of black leather. The Judge shook his head with a pure and utterly misunderstanding about why this would happen.

"Guard," The Judge said. "I'd like you to go to the house of Weasley and place Mr. Ronald Weasley under arrest for the rape of Hermione Granger."

"But, he didn't successfully rape her." Harry said, feeling stupid for even talking.

"It doesn't matter, he tried. That gives him a least a four year lock up." The Judge said showing sympathy towards Hermione.

"Wait," She piped up. With tears in her eyes she sighed. "I'm sorry, but Ronald Weasley did in fact successfully rape me." She said. "Last night, at about 6pm." She said, and Harry let out a gasping noise as Hermione broke down in tears.

"Hermione…" She stopped him before he spoke anything else.

"I'm sorry Harry." She cried. "I tried to stop him, but I just… I just wasn't strong enough! I tried to stay away, but I couldn't. He… He just took advantage of me and I had no way to stop him." She sat next to him and set her forehead on his shoulder. "I'm sorry," She cried, "So sorry."

"It's alright; the Judge will take care of it." Harry assured. "You need to be strong, but why didn't you tell me earlier?" He wondered.

"He said he'd kill me if I ever told anyone, and that he was my only lover and I was his only Princess." She spat the words like acid. Harry kissed her lips lightly.

"He'll never touch you again." Harry assured. "Even if I'm here… I won't let him. He'll pay or this. He'll die." He assured. She had kissed him back and with a relieved sigh she spoke.

"I love you." She said. "With all my heart."

"I love you too…" Harry said, kissing her a few more times as they became glued to each other. When they stopped the Judge cleared his throat.

"I'm sorry for this tragedy Ms. Granger, and Mr. Potter for being framed and I to fall for it. You'll be able to get out of here in about four months, if that's good enough, because it takes a while to have the papers sent and everything. You'll be able to resume back to the school at that time."

"Thank you… For everything." Harry said to both him and Hermione.

* * *

It hadn't even seemed that long before she found herself back at Hogwarts and a new Head Girl. She was sitting by the lake, missing the first feast, and looking upon the lake with a sigh from her lips as she thought about how Harry was doing and what he was thinking. She wondered if perhaps he was looking at the same moon she was, and somehow they were again connected, but she couldn't find the connection. She sat in a golden, sequin dress that was a bell shape at the end of her thin body and the night was dark with a full moon above.

"Hermione!" A girl shouted as she carried herself across the field.

"Ginny?" Hermione asked. "What are you doing here; I thought you were going to dinner." She said with confusion.

"What are _you_ doing out here, and so late at night?" Ginny asked wile ignoring her question, picking up her pace to reach Hermione as she sat planted on the bench.

"I've been out here for hours," Hermione said. "Why does it matter?"

"What have you been doing?" Ginny asked in amazement. "It's freezing out here!"

"I've been looking out over the lake for a while now, watching how the moonlight plays on the water below, and they blend like tongues of lovers in an everlasting kiss, and yet... it's not satisfying. Time is too short, and this reflection will cease at one point in time. Nothing can live forever, so why should I care now?"

"You love him, and he loves you. He'll be free someday soon. You'll see." Ginny said. Hermione laughed slightly.

"Yeah, and then all I'll be waiting home for is a stranger, just like the backside of the moon to the earth." She sighed. "He'll never be the same."

**Author's Note:**

**I am so incredibly sorry about everything and the posts that I have missed! I was up till midnight writing this so I would not miss it. I completely forgot and I've been working and I've been on Vay-Kay in Carolina over the Thanksgiving recess. I'm sorry about everything, and if you're mad at me right now for the promises I've made then I'll understand completely, but I hope to god you aren't mad at me. I'm a very forgetful person… Enjoy!**

**Airalynn**

**To My Reviewers:**

**Ravenseductress – **I saw the movie myself on the 19th. I hope you enjoyed, I personally think it's the best one yet. Wow, imagine Harry Potter rated R when it's a kid's book! Haha, that's so weird!

**Kyntor – **How the fuck are they acting like twelve year olds? I'm so confused by your review because it makes no sense! If you were raped or something or one of your parents died I'm sure you would be freaking out too. They are no where _near_ twelve. **CAN SOMEONE ELSE CLEAR THIS GUY'S REVIEW UP FOR ME?**

**Call me brit – **If I had a chance to meet a character, I'd take Hermione out to lunch and apologize for all the crap I've put her though. You're right… this is horrible. Everything will get better, I promise.

**Nicole13-1991 – **Thanks, enjoy!

**Sarah – **What the hell are you _trying_ to get people to hate me? And people seem to like it so what the hell do you know about what people want to read and what they don't want to read? I shouldn't have asked you to read it… knowing you and _your_ comments. You're being extremely mean to my writing, I hope you know that. Next time I seriously won't write just to piss you off, because your criticism is really pissing ME off right now. Oh, and for your information I was in North Carolina, if you want me to write so badly then buy me a fucking laptop, then I WILL be able to write everyday of my godforsaken life. Geezus! Just be fricken happy I update!

**Toga party – **Yup, I was Hermione, but my tie wasn't exact to the Gryffindor's, so it looked a little odd. Were you supposed to be Spongebob, a present? A cardboard box? THAT'S AWESOME! I wanna be a cardboard box next year! Did you enjoy GOF? I love it, but one of my friends rated it F, but I'm a nerd and rated it A+ because I loved it so. I was just a little disappointed in knowing that there was no Sphinx :(

**FroBoy – **She told him alright, but how could he kill him if he's in jail? Lol. Ah, Well, I still love your reviews. –wink wink- Maybe at some point you'll write, and I'll be behind you 100, because in time you'll find it to be fun.

**UPDATED: (SATURDAY) DECEMBER 10, 2005 – BIRTHDAY WISHES TIME! I have 4!**

**1.** Happy Belated Birthday to **Alfred Enoch **who plays **Dean Thomas**.His Birthday: **2nd**

**2. **Happy Belated Birthday to **Gemma Jones **who plays **Madam Pomfrey**. Her Birthday: 4th

**3. **Happy Almost Birthday to **Shirley Henderson** who plays **Moaning Myrtle **in **Chamber of Secrets, **and **Goblet of Fire**. Her Birthday: **24th** – AWESOME BATH SCENE SHIRLEY! HAHA!

**4. **Happy Almost Birthday to **Maggie Smith** who plays **Professor McGonagall**. Her Birthday: **28th**

**That's all! Until next time!**

**Quote:**

"**_I am accustomed to sleep and in my dreams to imagine the same things that lunatics imagine when awake_.**"


	13. Chapter Thirteen: What Have I Done?

**Chapter Thirteen:**

**What Have I Done?**

She stayed out most of the night, talking with Ginny as she kept telling herself that Harry would never become a stranger to her. She didn't understand it and she didn't understand what would cause her to say that. It had been only two days and it seemed like forever. She just had to be strong for another 120 days or so. 'Everything would be okay in the end' she would tell herself countless times, but it seemed that every time she said it, it only hurt more to admit it. She hadn't saved him, only cut down his sentence, but even that seemed like it wasn't not enough. She told herself a million times that she would save him, but she didn't, because he was still there.

She felt utmost regret after all the happened. All the happened after the fight, after Harry's sentence, after… Ron… She never had felt so weak and rather dirty in her life. She felt like post-year's trash. She felt like she couldn't breathe half the time, it's like she wasn't even living a life anymore. Ginny seemed okay with the fact that Hermione grieved non-stop for the next month or so, but she didn't feel right with the fact of Hermione being Head Girl when Malfoy was Head Boy. She felt this twist was not going to end well at all.

Hermione, though, didn't care with the fact of Malfoy being Head Boy. She knew nothing would come between her and Harry, especially this greasy-haired git who once made her life a complete living hell. It seemed though that Malfoy had grown up in the last few years. He didn't seem as rude or as appalling as before. Had he really changed all the much, or was Hermione just seeing things? She, for once in her life, felt comfortable talking to Malfoy, and she no longer would call him that, she now addressed him as "Draco."

* * *

It was going on eight in the morning when Hermione had waked for an early start of classes. She stood from the bed, stretching greatly, and staring out the window. She had the most perfect view of the lake from her personal balcony. It's like her mind when blank as she attempted to dress herself without taking her eyes off the water. No matter how hard she tried, she would never forget the fun she had there. All the laughter and smiles as her, Harry, and Ron would grow up. If it hadn't happened to her she would have never believed Ron would do such a thing. She began to whisper to herself, before she had been interrupted.

"Hermione?" A soft voice asked with gentle knocks on the door.

"I'll be out in a second, just waking up a bit." She assured. She could see the shadow of feet from under the door, and slowly she watched the shadows disappear. The figure had moved from the door.

She smiled gently and put her hair up in a black colored clip. She smoothed out her soft sweater material as it clung to her, and her jeans were faded at the knees slightly. She looked at herself in the mirror with a smile. She whispered: "Harry always loved this sweater." She commented and hugged herself gently. "Come home soon sweetie, come home soon…" She pleaded to herself. She sighed, knowing she wasn't really talking to him, and left the room.

Upon opening the door she could see a figure sitting on the couch. His bleach-blond hair shimmered in the morning fire light. She could feel herself grow light hearted with the thought of him being more of a friend and less of an enemy. About six years ago if someone had randomly came up to her and said "Hey, you'll be friends with Malfoy in the future!" she would have announced them crazy and offer to take them to Madam Pomfrey's.

"Good morning Draco." She smiled sweetly.

"Morning Hermione," he said nicely. "I brought you coffee, it's on the table next to you." He pointed out, she turned, grabbed the cup, and smiled again.

"Thank you," She said, a bit in shock. She walked and sat next to him on the couch.

"Hear anymore from the Judge about Potter?" He asked and Hermione shook her head.

"No, but don't call him Potter, it almost sounds like you hate him." She laughed. "It's okay to hate him; I just don't see why you do."

Draco shook his head. "A long long story, and unfortunately I don't have the time to tell." He laughed lightly. "What's your first class today anyway?" He wondered. She brought the cup to her lips and took a sip.

"Herbology," She said, taking another sip.

"I have Potions, and I'm basically in trouble because I didn't do my homework." He sighed and Hermione smiled.

"Why not?"

"I didn't feel like it." He added and she shook her head, oh how that statement sounded familiar. She smiled.

"My bag is in the corner of my room, you're welcome to copy mine." She offered. "I don't think Snape will even notice." She said through her mental melting of savory taste. Oh, how coffee tasted so great in the morning.

"I better just take the zero. It's Snape, how mad can he possibly get?" He asked and Hermione turned her head and gave him a look. He sighed. "Okay, so he's a bit bi-polar, but you're so much smarter than me and if I copy you then he'll know I didn't write it."

"Well, I over explain things most of the time, so my short answer questions are actually paragraphs. I think that paper is about killed." She giggled. "Just take a sentence out and re-word it, no big deal." Draco stopped her.

"Hermione er- it was multiple choice." He said strangely.

"Oh, umm… oops?" She laughed. "Haha, I wrote paragraphs for multiple choice… and I tell myself I'm not an over-achiever." She joked.

"Well everyone knew that wasn't true." He commented and she sighed with a slight nod.

"Yeah, well, you're a git anyway." She said hitting him upside the head.

"I'll just throw a few answers, that's all." He stated and Hermione nodded.

When they both headed down to breakfast the Great Hall seemed a little empty each day. It's like people were disappearing, but most of them came in around the time that she would be ready to leave. The Great Hall still amazed her, and she remembered it all the same. Each little trinket furnished a morning glow from their prior nights clean. The ceiling gave only the picture of a glorious sunny day, which occasionally led to rainy days outside, but it was beautiful out.

The man at the top of the room stood. His long silver hair reached his waist, and his beard reached down to his feet into a sharp point. She watched this man stand from the end of the front table in which she sat at proudly. She listened closely for his yearly speech about the year and new stories that are happening, but then she laid back. Nothing would make her happy enough to perk up and listen like she didn't need to be forced to.

"Good Morning Students." Dumbledore announced and everyone had simmered down into a gentle ripple. "Hope you are all feeling well today, I have a few announcements to make. The first one would be that the 7th year Graduation ball will be held on April 7th. You may invite anyone from 5th year and older. The second announcment is that the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher has misteriously dissappeared and we believe he has joined the Ministry, so give a warm welcome back to Professor Lupin."

In a heart beat there was over ninty percent of the Gryffindor table clapping, cheering, and whistling as it filled the room with noise. Hermione also sat cheering, but she was not at the table. She didn't want to cheer too loudly and create a distraction so she quietly clapped while Draco, on her left, was sighing with dispute. She rolled her eyes and then looked back to the room. She looked around to each table, but the Gryffindor table she refused to look at for the time being. Every time she would look at it she ended up thinking that she saw her love, but he was never there everytime she looked back to check. She wasn't sure if he'd ever be there.

"Ahem," Dumbledore said and suddenly the students quieted down. "The final announcement to make is welcome back, and enjoy your breakfast, and I think that'll do it." He smiled lightly. He held his goblet to the ceiling and with a smile he spoke. "To another year of Hogwarts, and may it be the best one yet!"

He raised his hands up, and in no time the food was piled onto the tables like every dinner feast. Hermione and Draco sat, staring at each other, while they dug into their eggs and sausage. Hermione couldn't believe how much this prat had changed into that of a gentleman. He even ate properly, he spoke proper, and what really amazed her was that he was no longer interested in being apart of the Slytherins any longer. What had happen to this child to finally decide to rebel against everyone but the common good? He was once Voldemort's follower... what had happened?

She didn't want to ask in fear of his reaction, and plus asking seemed quite rude at this moment. She was curious, but she didn't want to be the one to snap him from his ways. She liked him like this. She had fun sharing a common room with him, and at night they would pretend to be little kids and tell dumb little stories around the fire. She loved being with him, but then she also felt like she was in fact betraying Harry. Something about this set up didn't feel right at all, was she in fact betraying him, or was it just guilt? They were enemies, but maybe if Harry saw Draco now they'd sort out their differences and become friends.

She nearly smacked herself... them... friends... it made her laugh. There was no way that would be possible, even for the famous Harry Potter. She found it impossible for them to sort out their differences. If Draco tried, Harry would let his stubborness get the better of him, but if Harry tried Draco would begin to think letting him be his friend was a bit too nice for his "image." That's all Draco usually cared about: what others thought of him. Maybe she could get him to grow out of it. It would be easy, he's just like a big child, and all she needed was to teach him to be sincere.

She smiled as she swollowed her last bit of egg and she looked away from him. What was she doing? She was beginning to want to be best friends with this kid, but why? Maybe it was because she was lonely and she was alone now, or another reason being that she was, clearly, mentally insane. She didn't care anymore what other people thought, and that's what she wanted Draco to start learning how to do. You can't go through life caring and making yourself everything that you want others to be. That's not living, all it's doing is destroying the reason of it.

"Come on," Draco said, taking his last sip of juice. "I'll walk you to Herbology."

She ate her last peice of food, sipped the last of her juice, and took one last look around the almost empty room. Most students had already left, but she had stayed later than usual because she didn't feel the need to leave. She had to ambition to talk with Draco, and just talk, but she saw the time and noticed it was only five minutes or so before class would begin, and Hermione was not one to be late! She smiled sweetly at him, but she decided to shake her head, knowing the time, and just sighed.

"No, it's okay, you'll be late if you do." She said. "I'll be okay, you go on, and I'll just meet up with you later in the Common Room." She insisted.

"Okay," He replied. "Thanks for the homework by the way, you're a life saver."

"Anytime."

And with that she was gone. There was never a word after and to be not so lonely on the trip to the Herbology classroom, she was escorted by Neville. So he wasn't that fun to talk to, but at least it was someone. The entire time she completely ignored him and only responded with "yeah," as her head was on the subject of Harry, how he was doing, and the real reason why Draco was being so nice to her. Two days into school and she still seemed like a lost puppy in a big world, but then again she felt needed at the same time. Was this... normal?

* * *

It was almost midnight and Draco still hadn't returned to the common room. She slipped on a grey sweatshirt and entered the balcony. As she leaned up against the sidings she watched the moon and all of a sudden she felt like weight ad been lifted off of her. Was Harry watching the moon too between the damn bars that stop him from exiting hell? If some how that were connected by this and he could some how appear beside her, then she would love to fly, but other wise it seemed highly important. She hated magic because all the hell it put her through, but if she never went to Hogwarts she'd miss out on love too.

She sighed gently a tune began to gather up in her head, and then the words just came from her heart. She whispered it in a hopeful pray as the words excaped her lips. Music seemed to be the only calming thing she could do to help her right now, but for some reason the words came from her heart, but the tune seemed unimportant. Was it usually this way? Was it normal to block out everything except what you really want to do? Maybe she just wanted to sing, she didn't need music, because with or without she'd still sing.

_"Don't know where you are_

_Wish I just could be near you_

_I would sail oceans_

_To get a glimpse of how you feel_

_You're all the things I'm looking For everything and so much more_

_What I think_

_You are just perfect_

_Could it be_

_That I am worth it_

_Is this thing an open door_

_Walk right through to something more_

_You and me_

_My life would change in a second_

_In a second..."_

"In a second..."

"Hermione, I didn't know you sang."

She jumped quite high before she spun around and forcefully faced the man who spoke. There stood Draco, tall as ever, and with the same smirk as always on his face. He stood in a black suit as he leaned against the doorway. A certain silvery shine complimented his slick gelled hair. His clothes in the dark made him look like a sophisticated gentleman standing in a tuxedo, but he wasn't, it was just normal clothes. Hermione immediately pulled her hand to her heart and smiled as she leaned her back to the railings. She breathed deeply.

"I'm sorry," He said. "I never meant to startle you." He said, walking to her and gracefully taking her hand.

"No, it's okay." She insisted. "I was just admiring the moon, and some how hating it. I bet you're going to ask: why? So, I hate it because it knows so much more than any of us. It sees everything at night, even if we don't think so, it sees. I hate it because it has no feelings, nothing taken away, and no way in harming it. There is nothing you can do to make it show emotion. I hate it, I just want to ruin it because it's too perfect."

"Hermione," Draco said gently. "You don't need to be perfect for people to enjoy you or spending time with you. I like you the way you are, and perfection has nothing to do with it. You're crazy to even think that!"

"Draco, you're insane." She laughed with amazement. "I never intended to be perfect, I just hate things that are, in fact, perfect because it's not fair! We are here, stuck in drama with having people taken out of our lives, and that sits up top not giving a damn towards what people think or what they do!"

"You miss Harry, and Ron, don't you?" He asked, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Harry, I miss him everyday. Ron... don't even mention him. He doesn't deserve to be in Azkaban, that's a too nice a place for him, he deserves to be killed. Nothing will ever change what he did and I will make sure till the day that I die that he has no happiness. He deserves none of it." She turned tears in her eyes. "I didn't deserve it."

Hermione walked to the corner of the balcony and practically collapsed in the corner of it. She pulled her knees to her chest and took a deep breath, and before she knew it her tears were falling. She cried into her knees, helpless, and feeling that there is no place where she can't get hurt. Draco just stared at her in sympathy. Her hair surrounded her face, and the tears trailing from her eyes, he couldn't help himself, but to kneel beside her and hold her close. He cooed into her ear and told her constantly that everything will soon be alright and the world will be the way it's supposed to, but he couldn't get the subject of Ron off his mind.

"Hermione," He asked, hugging her close. "May I ask you a personal question?" He asked, his silver eyes looking down to her with heart ache.

"I... I guess..." She sniffled, and Draco took a deep breath.

"What did Weasley do to you that makes you so afraid to hear his name?" He asked, Hermione looked at him with confusion. "I mean, every time I mention his name you get all weird and stuff, but this is the first time I've seen you cry."

"If I tell you, judge me not, because I had no control over it. Understand the pain that I went through and I'm going through just to tell you. Understand it's not funny and it's no joke." She said, sitting up straight and speaking with complete seriousness.

"Hermione, will you just tell me?" He pleaded, knowing to do all that stuff anyway.

She turned to him, his silvery eyes looked at her, and she practically melted. She leaned her head against his shoulder and she started crying again. He held her closer, rocking her gently, and telling her that she could trust him. He begged and pleaded for her to tell him, but it hurt so much to just say the words. She wasn't proud of it, she wasn't happy about it, and she wasn't thrilled by it. She was nothing but completely disgusted. Never did she expect something so wrong, but she also ended up knowing that she could never forget it. It would always linger through her, and it would never make her feel any better.

"Draco," she whispered. "He raped me."

And with that more tears just poured out from her eyes. She gasped as the pain in her heart increased, hating herself more, and having the largest desire to scream at the moon for being a traitor. Draco just hugged her, feeling her pain, and sweetly he wiped away her tears. She looked up, staring into his eyes deeper, and she just forgot everything. All she cared about was looking at him and the look in his eyes made her feel more secure than ever. She hugged him around the neck, and his arms wrapped around her waist as they stayed in a ten minute hug before Hermione was the one to pull away.

"I'm so... sorry." He said, feeling completely helpless. "I have no idea what to say, that's awful, and you seem so strong to be the one that experienced it. He's in Azkaban though, and even if he comes back to school, I'll protect you. I'll make sure he never touches you again."

"Draco," she said as she situated herself as he insisted her to sit in his lap. "I can't ask that of you, I can't..."

Before she knew it she had lost all interest in talking. Her quivering lip had stopped once this boy had suddenly decided to move towards her. With a deepness of enjoyment in her voice she smiled and leaned into him. She wrapped her arms tightly around him, and his kiss had taken her into a fantasy land. She backed down a bit, and her mind had raced a million thoughts at once, and a million memories came back. She lied to Harry. She pretended to have lost her memory, but she lost nothing. It was still clear as ever, and she counter jinxed herself as an act. She didn't want to forget it, she wanted to fight. That night came back, the toothpaste, the bathtub, and the promises...

_Harry leaned forward and wrapped her in his arms. He pulled her to him and kissed her lips deeper than ever. He didn't want to let go, and he didn't want to leave her alone. She had been through so much, and he couldn't survive without her. She was his life now, and he would not turn his back on family. The Weasleys would be okay, for they would end up sending him candy and such until he was once again free. He pulled away._

"_I love you Hermione, and I'll be back for you." He whispered_

"_I'll be here waiting." She said. "But... What about Ron? What are we going to do?"_

"_Might as well obliviate him... maybe he'll forget his obsession with you too, and then hopefully it will all be in our heads." Harry recommended. "His parents would turn us away if we told anyone."_

"_We need to be smart about this Harry," She said responsibly. "Is there a way we can obliviate him out of his obsession with me?" She wondered._

She broke away and looked into his eyes and suddenly the weight was back. She stood, stumbled, and began to take slow steps backwards. She put her fingers against her lips and trembled hard. She couldn't believe it. The pain seemed to multiply with the guilt and hatred towards herself. She called herself a filthy mudblood multiple times in her head. He looked confused, but as she took small steps backwards it was like she couldn't think anymore. She didn't love him, she loved Harry... what was this? She tore her face away from him as quick as a rabbit and cried.

"... what have I done?"

* * *

**Author's Note:**

**To my Reviewers**

**Toga Party - **Your costume sounds completely awesome. Don't worry about the Sarah girl... I've learned to live with her, but she is, in fact, the reason I stopped writing. This chapter is so late because she decided to push it to the limit where I just broke down and stopped. If people don't enjoy my writing it tears me apart. Then, I got her recent review and it pissed me off so much that I needed to write. So welcome me back into fanfiction, because I will finish this story. Sorry it's later, hope you are well, and thank you for all your support :)

**FroBoy - **Sorry, this isn't exactly soon, but the reason why I didn't update is in the note above to Toga. Read that, and then please forgive me for not updating.

**missradcliffe** **- **Yeah, actually, I hate Ron anyway. He seems like an un-needed character and he is just... annoying. I mean I still respect him as a real character of J.K, but I seriously hate him. Hopefully I get Harry out soon, I think the line I'm look for is "Hermione, I think you got some 'splainin to do!"

**Midnite At Noon - **Apologies on the spell check thing... my computer got a virus in it and I have to be forced to write on a "notepad" doccument, and the problem is: no spell check. So if there are any mistakes it's because I missed them when I re-read it. Sorry about your impatient waiting.

**sakura-sweeti - **Haha, a flight of stairs? Haha, this isn't kindergarten, if it were Kyntor would be interested in reviewing nicely. Haha, we'll just see what happens, but for now it's a mystery for the both of us ;) Again sorry for the impatient waiting I made you sit though, but please forgive me. Thank you so much for your respect for me and your willingness to stick up for me and my story. You are my most loved reviewer and I'll finish this story for you, I promise. Sarah got in my way, as she stated, and that review drove me mad. I can prove that this story will be finished and she is not going to do anything, but read.

**Sarah - **I have nothing to say to you, my fans say it all.

**UPDATED: (FRIDAY) JULY 28, 2005 - JULY BIRTHDAY WISHES:**

**1. **Happy Belated Birthday to **Edward Randell **who plays **Justin Finch-Fletchley.** His Birthday: **2nd**

**2. **Happy Belated Birthday to **Fiona Shaw** who plays **Petunia Dursley.** Her Birthday: **10th**

**3. **Happy Belated Birthday to **Jeff Rawle** who plays **Amos Diggory.** His Birthday: **10th**

**4. **Happy Belated Birthday to **Jamie Waylette** who plays **Vincent Crabbe.** His Birthday: **21st**

**5. **HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO **DANIEL RADCLIFFE** who plays **HARRY POTTER! **His Birthday: **23rd! **drool

**6. **Happy Almost Birthday to **Frances de la Tour** who plays **Madame Maxime. **Her Birthday: **30th**

**7. **Happy Almost Birthday to **Richard Griffiths** who plays **Uncle Vernon. **His Birthday: **31st**

**That's it, until next time!**

**Airalynn**

**Quote:**

_**"When a dove associates with a crow: its feathers remain white, but its heart grows black." **_


	14. Chapter Fourteen: Web of Lies

**Chapter Fourteen**

**Web of Lies**

Hermione knew what she had done and why she labeled it a mistake, but Draco seemed to think of it as a blessing. She couldn't believe what had happened. She didn't want him, for she loved Harry more than anything and what she did was the biggest screw up she had ever made. Kissing him was nothing but unadulterated betrayal. It almost seemed like everyday she would hate herself more because of something she did or something that happened. If everything happened for a reason then maybe there was a reason why her and Harry couldn't be together. No, it couldn't be true.

All she could do was take a step backwards and act as if she looked herself in the mirror and saw a monster. She soon realized that there are no mistakes in life but only the few things that you simply wish would never happen. Was this meant to be or was this actually betrayal to Harry? What would happen if he knew? How would he respond? Maybe he would understand it was an accident and Draco came onto her. Maybe he wouldn't even be mad but be willing to forget it. What if he never found out at all? That seemed like the best case scenario.

She took one more step backwards, secretly questioning the awkward silence, and turned back to him. He had a gleam of sadness in his eyes that she couldn't help but give into. She seemed almost willing to kiss him again, but as the tears fell down her cheeks it started to rain. It was weird how it rained every time something bad happened. She turned on her heal, covered her face, and ran inside. What the hell was she thinking by pulling a stunt like that? She ran for her room and as soon as she entered it she dove onto her bed, covering her face completely with a pillow, and wishing the past away.

It seemed like a lifetime of happiness just died within an hour of stupidity. Would Harry still want to marry her after what she had done? Or if she decided to keep it a secret how long could she do it before the truth ate away inside her so much that she didn't have a choice but to tell him? After all these questions were asked by her self she heard a knock at the door. She knew it was Draco, she knew he wanted to talk; she knew that she couldn't give in to him, but she also couldn't ignore him either. Maybe just this one time she could do something different and save at least a friendship.

"Co… Come in." she said, sitting up. She pulled her knees to her chest and sniffled.

"Hermione, we really need to talk." Draco said softly, making his dramatic entrance in. She nodded gently as she gestured him to sit on the bed, and instantly he had. "I don't know what happened tonight or what I did to upset you, but I'm very sorry."

"Draco, you just kissed me. Me, 'Granger the Mudblood,' that upsets me!" She shouted with a wounded heart.

She refused to even look away from him. She wanted to see his eyes, she wanted to see her hurt him. After the six years of pain he caused her, she needed to do a bit of damage herself. Was it wrong of her to intend to hurt him so badly that he would regret it the rest of his life? Was it horrible of her to attempt revenge on him for the six years of hell? They were after all children, but as they grew up nothing changed. Why did she have to ask herself only hard questions? Why did she even start talking to him? Even though he swore that he matured, it seemed like to her he would never be anything but what he was.

"That was a year ago, and I've grown up since then. Hermione, a lot happened to me over the summer. I learned what I did was wrong, and now that my father is in prison I have room to learn my ways and redeem myself from my childhood past. I'm free to be who I want to be." He smiled and took her hand, but she managed to slip hers away.

"Don't you see? I'm not like you Draco. I can't date people and then turn around a kiss another. I'm taken, and I love him." She insisted.

"You only love him because you are afraid to love anyone else." He quarreled.

"What are you implying?" She asked, standing up, and pacing the room with anger.

"I'm commenting on the fact that the only reason you love him is because he saved the world. You want riches, you want power, but most of all you are afraid to not love him because you feel save around him. Love isn't just feeling secure for life; love is having fun with the person that you say you love. If all he did was save you from the fool that raped you, well, that's pretty pathetic." He growled.

"That's not true, that's not even _close_ to true!" She insisted. "I love him because he is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me. I love him more than life itself. I'd give him the world if I could." She cried. "I love him so much that it hurts."

"It shouldn't hurt. And what does he have to give you… prison food? Come on, Hermione, he has nothing for you. Can't you see? He's nothing now. He's not even here to sweep you off your feet. Will he give you the world? Will he give you everything you need? Will he make you so happy you'll never question your relationship? Do you trust him enough to know he won't cheat?" Draco asked, so close to her she could feel his breath on her as he yelled. "What is one thing he's done for you?"

"He proposed to me!" She yelled and the coloring in Draco's face instantly drained away. "See my ring?" She pointed to it on the nightstand. "He's asked me to be his everything, and I will be." She stated directly.

"If it means that much and that is actually an engagement ring, then why aren't you wearing it?" He asked, mad. "Is it because every time you look at it you realize you don't love him enough to marry him?" He asked.

"It's nothing like that!" She hissed. "A few days ago when I wore it I felt sad and alone because he's not here beside me. It has nothing to do with what you think it does. We shared the best night of our lives and then he proposed, and every time I see the ring it makes me sad that we can't relive that night for months or maybe even years."

"So because of one night of shagging you're going to throw your fairy tale ending away? You're completely mental. Love can't buy you the world, love can't buy you diamonds, and in a few ways love can't buy you happiness. One day you'll say you love him, the next day you do something that makes him mad and he strikes you." He growled. "You're going to take that chance?"

"You're the one talking crazy! Harry would never hit me, and I know he won't. He is my Fairy Tale. You are the annoying rock that stands between us. Now please leave me be!" She begged as she started to shake. Why were they doing this?

"I can't leave you alone, I'm involved now." He stated. "And I never showed you how much I felt for you in the past, and I don't intend on losing you again."

"What are you saying?" She asked as she took a step backwards.

"I'm in love with you, Hermione, I am. You can't help who you fall in love with, right? So please allow me a chance to show you how I feel. I'd give you the world, I'd give you everything you need, I'd give you happiness, and I'd always let you know how much you mean to me. Let us just run away and fly the hell out of here." He said with hope. "Please?"

"Please. Leave." She said, walking to the door and pointing him out. "I don't need this. My fiancé is in prison and he didn't even do anything wrong, and I will not let some greasy haired git divide us!" She pushed him. "Leave!"

"Not until you tell me you don't love him. I know you don't. You haven't even responded to one of his letters! I see his letters come in with his owl everyday for the past month and I have not seen one sent back. The letters just pile up on the end table in the common room, unopened, and untouched." He declared. "You don't love him, you know you don't."

At this point Draco had leaned into kiss her again, but Hermione drew back and struck him across the left cheek. She pushed him until Draco left the room. How dare he say that, how dare he love her and beg for her to leave Harry. They were getting married, she would have a family, and she would be happy for the rest of her life. This was her Fairy Tale. It came true and no Slytherin would ever get in the way of them. She had to do something to get the sickening taste out of her mouth. She paced her room, hugging her arms against her ungrateful body, and crying the night away. She had never been so confused. She had never been so hurt. She had never been so guilty.

She ran forwards and placed her hands upon the glass door that separated her from freedom. The rain was coming down harder than ever. Maybe if she could just step out for a moment and feel the rain it would give her faith. Maybe if she took one minute of loving life instead of finding ways to hate it she could live her life like it was her dream. Maybe it would help her keep a smile on and never take it off. Maybe if she accepted life she would live a happy one, and it seemed like if she didn't take the time to ignore the evil and bad in life than she wouldn't be living… she'd be running.

She slid open the door and a rush of freshly poured rainy mist came in to meet her nose. She took a deep breath and a smile, which she hadn't had in hours, came back as she took a step out. The warm flooded balcony seemed irresistible as the water fell off of it like a waterfall and onto the ground. She closed her eyes, looked up, spread her arms out wide, and twirled in circles as she laughed in joy. Then as she looked down at her feet, the hurting pain in her heart had once again returned. She closed her door and walked to the railing of the Balcony.

She touched it gently and then in a heartbeat she found herself climbing on top of it, standing as she looked down in fear. What should she do? What should she think? Should she jump and end her misery and problems? Should she jump to stop the quarrel and let neither Harry nor Draco have her? Draco seemed to remind her more and more of Ron everyday. Saying all that stuff and then turning around and harming her like she thought they thought she was special and then ruin her. She tilted her head to the sky as the rain poured harder each millisecond. She took a deep breath and began shouting to the sky.

"Why have you given me this misery? Why do you make me choose between two people that are close to me and have one of them taken away while the other attempts to make me fall in love with him? Is this punishment for not being strong enough to fight off Ron? Is this punishment for being afraid of life because of Harry's past and our relationship together? Am I so horrible that I don't deserve him or Draco? It seems like everything has gotten in the way of us and it's like we're not allowed to be happy. It's like I don't deserve a smile and every time I even put one on it takes a while for me to even notice I have it on, and after I notice I feel horrible about it. What have I done to be treated this way? Am I supposed to sort it out and tell Harry the truth and everything that happened? Should I respond to the letters that I have mistakably ignored. Should I write back in apologies and tell him everything? Would he understand? I'm so lost in the world I am in and having magic just makes it feel like it's even worse. Why must life treat me like a guinea pig or some psycho experiment? Why is love so hard to understand?"

She screamed into the night not even accepting the fact that there would never be a response. She sadly took deep breaths into the nightly rain and cupped her face within her unworthy hands. She kneeled onto the railing top and hugged her knee as she looked down questioning if she should jump or not. She stood back up, took a deep breath, and with a gulp she closed her eyes. She started walking for the edge. She lifted her foot forward, attempting to fall, but she planted her foot back down as she heard a sudden whistle in the wind.

An orange orb of light circled around the clouds as it kept the golden Phoenix inside safely dry from the storm. Its golden wings spread widely as it landed on the railing next to her. Its green eyes softly stared at her as she kneeled and touched it gently. She didn't know whether to smile, cry, or jump. Was this finally one last spark of hope she could find? Maybe this bird was the answer to everything, but she had never seen it before in her life. Weird it seemed to befriend a stray bird whose tears could heal the world. But she would need something more than a tear to fix her.

"Fawkes?" She wondered and it softly shook its head back and forth. "Are you a stray then?" It once again said no. "Then why are you here?"

"To stop you from jumping," the wind whispered softly. She was amazed, and this was unbelievable.

"Come inside, and out of the rain." She opened the door and gestured him in.

It made a long, loud, screeching bird noise as it tumbled inwards. What was this animal and what was it doing here? Did it belong to someone in the castle and it just happened to see or hear her screaming off the balcony? She watched it shake the drops of water off of its beautiful designed golden feathers and land precisely next to her Engagement ring, which she still wasn't wearing. She sighed and sat on the bed as she dabbed her hair with a towel. She just looked at it and analyzed its beauty. She reached forward and stroked its feathers gently.

"Your eyes… they seem so familiar." She sighed as the bird quickly blinked one eye and she jumped a bit. "Do I know you?" The bird just raised its head high and dropped it down quickly and raised it again.

She held out her arm as the bird positioned itself onto her forearm. She stroked it, trying to figure out where she had seen it before, or possibly if it were a person who'd it be. It seemed like a puzzle, and she couldn't find anyway to figure it out. She had never seen it, for she would have remembered it, and the only thing she could even try to link it to would be how familiar its eyes were. She sighed, petting it gently, and letting him back to her nightstand. It bend it's sad head down to the table top and clasp the ring from within its beak and she looked at it suspiciously.

"No… it can't be…" She noted, staring into the emerald green eyes and seeing a squiggly line under its right wing. "…Harry?"

And with that it was gone. It vanished into thin air as she scrambled around the room looking for where it had gone. She ran to her door and there it was, soaring into the night in the sheltered bubble. It was him, and she knew it was. She ran to her nightstand and picked the ring up that once was wedged within his beak. She pulled it to her lips, kissed it gently, and placed it on her finger. She ran to the door and opened it once again, calling out to him in the middle of the night. It was him he was here. He was watching over her, like he said he would. What if he saw everything that went on tonight? And then she heard the wind again.

"I will always love you…" the wind howled as the orange orb headed towards the moon. "Remember that." And it disappeared.

She jumped in joy as she fell onto her bed. She practically forgot about everything that happened earlier, and with nothing left to upset her she blazed off into the common room. She found it empty. It seemed weird that it was empty because at this time Draco was always found doing his homework and asking her for a bit of help while absentmindedly copying it. She never really mattered much, but she was a bit concerned. His door was opened and inside was a note tucked away under his pillow. She lifted it and with silver ink upon green paper it read:

"_Hermione,_

_I understand what I did tonight was wrong and I honestly don't know why I acted the way I did. I give you a thousand apologies and let you know that I probably won't be in the common room for the rest of the semester. Hiding out somewhere else and thinking about the mistakes I have made._

_Always, Draco"_

It seemed like she read the letter a thousand times before she realized that she hurt him so much that he no longer wished to share a room with her. She did act rude towards him, and even if he was a git to her when they were younger, she grew up better and she learned to be polite. She understood why or why not some things shouldn't be said. Everything said tonight seemed like it shouldn't have been said, but she had to say something for she was betrothed to someone else and Draco was just a rock in the way of it all. She had to talk to Ginny, as quickly as possible.

She ran in her room and closed the door. With a _click_ it was locked in a second. She radiated a spell so that no one outside the room could hear her. She locked the sliding door, she closed the curtains, and when everything was completely secured and a candle softly lit, she crossed her legs upon her bed and folded her hands as if to pray. She bent her head down and rested her forehead at the tip of her fingers. She softly breathed as she clapped her hands twice and began to say a soft message as she whispered into her flattened fingers.

"Reunite, let us not fight, and if something isn't right, may you burst with spite." She opened her hands as a spider web of light extended from her finger tips. She whispered softly. "Rayne," she sang. "Rayne?"

"Jane," a voice whispered, and inside the web Ginny's face grew clear. "Jane, what are you doing? It's in the middle of the night and the other girls are out."

"Rayne, listen to me," Hermione said excitedly. "I was sitting outside in the storm, just talking to myself, when this golden phoenix came out of nowhere. It told me not to jump because it thought I was going to, and it came inside my room and it just had these eyes that looked so familiar it was crazy!" She jumped up and down. "It was Harry!"

"Ummm, Jane, what did you have to drink tonight?" She asked half asleep.

"About two goblets of pumpkin juice, why?" She asked confused.

"That's it? No firewhiskey, no butterbeer, no nothing? You sure?" She asked, blinking away the sleep, and finally Hermione got the reference.

"Rayne, I am not crazy, nor am I drunk! I know it was him! You have to believe me!" She pleaded. "He flew in, picked up my engagement ring, and I asked if it was him and then he disappeared into the moonlight saying 'I will always love you.' It was Harry… I know it was!"

"Okay, so basically Harry learned how to turn into a rare bird overnight, broke out of jail, came to tell you not to jump off a balcony, basically told you to wear your ring and then flew back to jail? Yeah, that makes complete sense to me." She said as sarcasm dripped from her tongue.

"It does sound a bit crazy, I know, but you out of all people I would expect to believe me. Come on, you know I'm not crazy, please, you have to believe me." She begged.

"Okay, okay, I believe you, but it's weird." She noted. "Speaking of weird what happened between you and Malfoy?" She asked.

"Nothing." Hermione said immediately.

"Oh, come on, my web is glowing pink, meaning you're lying… what happened?" Ginny asked. "Come on, you can tell your best friend can't you?" She begged.

"Not now, it's too risky. I'll tell you some other time when we're face to face. It's quite a long story actually." Hermione said with a sigh. "Note that it was never intended to happen and I seriously don't know why it did. And when I do tell you, promise you will think nothing less of me."

"I promise." She replied and Hermione smiled. "Look, Jane, I got to get going. Blondie… er- Lavender is coming and you know how nosey she gets! By the way, we really should get her a new code name… 'Blondie' sounds like a name someone would use to hit on children. Ewww, I knew something was wrong with her!" They both laughed.

"You are so horrible." Hermione mentioned and Ginny just agreed. "Good night."

Hermione firmly closed her hands, and when she reopened them the web was completely gone without a trace of existence. Their webs were a secret way to communicate, sadly she never taught Harry how to do it, and if she had remembered she would have so they could still talk. Now they had no way to communicate and she had no idea what he was feeling, she didn't know what was on his mind, or when he would be able to leave that rotten cell for good. She sighed and laid flat on her bed. She laid there for a few minutes just taking in her surroundings by candlelight.

Then she remembered. There was some way they could communicate, and she had completely forgotten about it. It seemed unreal. How could she overlook such a stupid mistake? Of course, the pile of unread letters in the common room! She ran out of her room, grabbed them, and ran back in once again sealing the spell. She smiled, but then the frown came back. Should she read it? What if what he wrote was bad and somehow they found a way to make him stay in Azkaban for longer. She gulped and dragged her nail underneath the sealed flap. Three days old, but the ink still smelled fresh. The golden ink shimmered on the soft parchment paper. It was time.

_My Dearest Hermione,_

_It seems like the more and more I write to you, the less and less you respond. I seem to find myself questioning rather you are reading my letters or not. If you are not I understand, for I'm sure you are worried I write about bad things that are happening or something, but I assure you everything is fine. I shall be home soon, my love. I got a surprise visit from Dumbledore today, and he seems to be doing quite well. I told him the news about us. Then I got a visit from the Judge again, funny, he seemed not happy to see me. He did mention though that he sent my release papers and I should be home soon within the next week or so. Around four to seven days approximately I guess I'll be home. Maybe when I get there I'll be able to take my place as Head Boy, like Dumbledore wanted, but this came up. News says that Malfoy is moving out because I should be back soon. I don't know if you get along or not, but I guess I'll just have to find out. Just please let me know that you're alright and that Malfoy hasn't harmed you? I get very worried about you when I know you are roomed with him. Maybe you can tell me about it when I get home and we can talk about the wedding perhaps. I love you, with all my heart, and if I had the chance I'd pick you up and swing you around as I kissed you and sang to you underneath the moonlight. Just remember I will always love you and hope you are having a good time back at Hogwarts. Let everyone know I say hello for me._

_Love forever and always, _

_Harry_

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

**Author's Note:**

**I think this is my favorite chapter since a while. Haha, I love the conversation between Hermione and Ginny where Ginny goes into the big Sherlock Homes things and ends up saying "Yeah, that makes complete sense." Yeah, oh my, I love it.**

**To My Reviewers:**

**Darknight3030 – **Okay that was the first review I got when I posted my new chapter and when I finished reading it I didn't walk away with a smile. I considered it's a flame. My stories are open to everyone because I have friends that review and there's no point in getting an account if you don't write. Just because I attempt to please everyone and it doesn't pan out that way isn't a reason to yell at me and basically say "fuck you and get a backbone." I just want to try and make everyone happy. Plus when I started this story I was, in fact, a child with no writing skills what so ever and yeah, I found someone to make it tough on me, so that's how I improved.

**toga party – **I heard about the play and I guess that they are going to use the non-nudity one. It's not because his contract forbids it, but because he's under 18 it counts as child pornography. Not that I'd be complaining though drool Haha. I don't really like Ron either, considering what I made him do in my story, but Ginny I'm not that against, but I don't really like her either. I just think the guy should get the girl as in Harry get Hermione, but you know Hermione will end up with Ron… Makes me kinda hate JK, lol, just kidding. I have another story called "Strange Magic" and Harry and Ginny were dating and she basically blew him off and then "YAY! Harry and Hermione got married and had a kid!" Lol… and then she gets abducted… yeah, bad story that one is.

**Froboy – **Yeah, this isn't soon either, but seriously it took me like four hours in a park alone to come up with the first paragraph… I had NO idea where to go with it.

**Sarah – **Except it was your loss because now a bazillion people on Fanfiction hate you. At least I still have fans; at least I still have talents. At least I'm not a 300 pound-KFC loving-fat girl who get off to Japanese Anime. Geee, nice to know you.

**missradcliffe – **Why would you want them to solve problems with Ron? If you were raped would you want to be all like "Hey, let's be friends…" Well, okay, that was harsh of me to say it that way, but it seems really weird that you'd say that. I'm open for suggestions though.

**sakura-sweeti – **I try to put a lot in my chapters because it seems like people who write LONG chapters about being in one room and what the room looks like and all the people are wearing and such just gets, I don't know, boring after a while? And it's like 20 chapters before anyone _says_ anything… gah! It drives me completely mad! Harry may find out, he may not… we'll just have to see. And I'm not worried about Sarah anymore, I've grown up, and I've ignored her childish ways. Plus, every time I notice a spelling error I want to commit suicide. Lol. I am a grammer FREAK. Haha, hope you love this chappie. -Airalynn

**That's everyone! Hope you enjoy!**

**  
Airalynn**

**UPDATED: (FRIDAY) AUGUST 25, 2006**

**_"I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada." _Brittany Spears**


	15. Chapter Fifteen: Fire Whiskey

**Chapter Fifteen:**

**Fire Whiskey**

The letter was there in plain black and white, and yet she didn't even want to believe that she was so stupid enough to not read it in the first place. She seemed to be on edge more than ever before now, and she had no idea why. Was it just guilt from everything that happened within the night? Was it happiness that Harry did find a very peculiar way to come and save her at last? Was it all just a dream and she really was beginning to become crazy?

The rain fell like darts onto the castle and every stuck of lighting made her jump and feel twice as alone. She felt different knowing that no one occupied the room next to hers because Draco had left. It seemed funny that in his letter he wrote that he was hiding, and she got the impression that he was possibly trying to rid his memory of her for once and for all. Could it be that everything he said was true? Did he actually love her? And again it seemed that the room had gotten a bit darker and she was lost.

Her room spun around her a million times as she felt sick with grief and love. She couldn't feel her fingers, she couldn't move her body, and she couldn't breathe as easily as normal. Her heart raced faster, and that seemed to be the only thing at the time that worked. Her mind was blank like a brand new chalkboard. Her thoughts had flew out of her head like it was the Owlery and she had to send everyone messages about something big that was going on. Something big was going on, but it was personal.

She had never felt so lonely that it injured her from the inside and slowly ate away at her mind. She felt like she was lying down on a cold floor drowning away in her sorrowful night alone. When she had gained all trace of conscience again she sat up, screamed painfully in her head, and fell back down. She planted her face in her pillow as she screamed once again. Was it just loneliness or was this a heavy dose of poison from her guilt and betrayal?

The night pressed on, and even though the rain passed through harder she still could find no way to become comfortable. She couldn't sleep, not when something this big was bothering her. She tangled herself within the sheets, but nothing would work. She couldn't keep her eyes closed without fearing something was out there. She couldn't go to sleep just like that knowing that Harry was not by her, and wouldn't be for a while. She couldn't go on like this.

She knew her actions were unhealthy. She knew that everything that she worked for for so long was grinding to a halt. She completely missed the fact that she had missed over four lessons in the past few days. She refused to do homework, she managed to only ace one test, and that was a class that she didn't even care for. She no longer cared about what she was doing or where she was going with her life. All she seemed to care about was Harry's safety.

She hadn't eaten much in the last few days. She seemed less interested in activities such as the Ball. She didn't play kindly with reasonable and sweet conversations with people anymore. She locked herself in her room all hours of the day. After that night she hadn't slept in days either. She hadn't done anything but sat in her room and cry her life away as she finally lost all ambition to be smart. She lost all energy to move from place to place, and she unhealthily wheezed when she breathed.

She was parched, but she would not get a drink. She would not ask a house-elf to do so for her either. She would not go down to meals. She would not show up for meetings, and she would not find anyway to distract her from wanting so much to fall off of the balcony and end everything that ever started. One small step off, and one large fall into a painful and then relaxing freedom was all that awaited her. The word was calling out to her, and cheering her on: freedom.

She would not allow a bird to stop her from trying to save herself. She would no longer let people walk all over her like an abused doormat. She would no longer look at herself in the mirror and feel that she did nothing but constantly annoy people her entire life. She would never look in the mirror with a smile while knowing that everything was her fault. Maybe she would have been better off if she didn't tell anyone about Ron, then maybe right now she wouldn't feel so lonely.

Even though his powerful and hurtful ways had caused harm and misery to her she couldn't help but wonder if he was just that pushy because he felt he needed to be. She would give anything to have someone beside her and softly say to her that they loved her. She could go to bed with a smile and wake up beside the one that gave her a smile and feel that it was the best day of her life. Then maybe if it happened everything would return to normal.

She suddenly felt like she was the one in prison, and not Harry. She knew she could go outside and run in the rain if she wanted to, but no longer did she seem interested in being spontaneous for once in her life. She no longer felt the need to do anything but sit and wait for Harry to come home. The thing that always stayed off her mind though, and quite awkwardly it kept returning to her every other minute, was that if it was in fact a possibility that she could die waiting.

Suddenly her scratchy throat went from less interesting to annoying. She grabbed a bottle of Firewhiskey that she smuggled into the castle when she was dared to do so. She kept it for a memory, but now she needed it more than ever. She opened it and she took a sip, and it was like everything that bothered her disappeared. The weight that pushed her down was now granting her the privilege to stand back up, to catch a breath, to smile, to love, to run, and to jump.

For some reason though she still sat there, saying nothing. Constantly her hands were vibrating, knowing Ginny was calling through their tangled webs, and she did nothing but ignored it and that's how it felt it had to be. She couldn't sit there and randomly answer it as if it was a normal day, for it was different. It was strange, and it was dark and dreary inside her. She wondered why no one had come looking for her, assuming they noticed she was absent from classes, and not one person had delivered her homework in the past two days.

Maybe if she could hang on just a little longer it might turn out to be that her life was no longer terrifying but brilliantly crafted. She would once again walk down the halls and witness the Slytherins make fun of her while the Gryffindors were absolutely inspired by her. She would laugh with the others, she would play countless games of Exploding Snap and then she would return to her corridors around bed time and fall into a peaceful sleep from there… or so it would seem.

The fact that she no longer stayed with the rest of the House seemed to annoy her the most. She was the one getting special treatment and she was the one person who least deserved it. She was the one who lost all interest in the title after Harry was taken from her, but maybe it wasn't just Harry. Could it be possible that every thing is the way it is because she is not grateful enough to except anything less, and if she didn't get the title she would loath the person who did for the rest of their lives.

She seemed to hate herself more now, and feeling very shameful of her actions the past few hours, and even with a half a bottle of Whiskey gone, nothing was right yet. The bottle practically danced between her fingers as she twisted it around and fell back onto the bed, heart heavy with hate, and it was almost like her ceiling was a mirror and she was looking at herself and hating herself so much that she wished she could just kill the figure and move on. The problem was, after you die, is moving on really what you do?

And to say if Harry was in fact the phoenix, it helps no more that he helped once and then once again arbitrarily disappeared without an explanation. She wondered if he had other plans or if he actually was released from Azkaban, but did not wish to come back to school yet. Did it make sense? Probably not. Did she care? Probably not. Though it bothered her so much she couldn't even sit still and with annoyance she managed to find herself in a comfortable position to breathe normally.

It seemed like it had been forever since the last time she breathed, and though it would be ages before she could ever find another comfortable spot she hoped to stay in this one as long as she could. Maybe because it was on her side facing that exact way was the exact same position that she had managed to fall asleep in after making love to her fiancé. And again she felt that that word too was chasing her. It was almost like she no longer wished to call him that title and just let it remain "Harry."

She finally found the ambition to open her window, and below she could hear the younger ones practicing their singing of the Hogwart's song. They didn't sound good, they didn't sound bad, but if you were a mile away you would be able to recognize that it was being sung by a bunch of amateur children instead of well rehearsed soon-to-be-graduates. She couldn't sing good, so she would not brag nor say anything bad about their singing, but she didn't enjoy it at all.

She shut the window with an awkward snap and then once again her darkened room turned back into pure silence. Oh how she hated it, and oh so much she just wanted to scream so loud and no one would hear her, but she knew she would be heard and that's why she wouldn't scream. She didn't want to be heard, she didn't want to be talked to, and she didn't want to be seen. She would not allow anyone to even have a chance to do so with her and all she would do was sit.

So that's what she intended to do, sit there again, drinking away her memories and pain and possibly miss yet another night of sleep. Maybe, though, if she went to sleep now she wouldn't wake up. Maybe she could curse herself so her heart stopped beating and then without knowing it she would die peacefully in her sleep. She lay down, shut her eyes instantly, but once again she could not sleep. The black circles under her eyes became dark like chalk and she wiped away the tears that she once again began to shed.

What was she thinking, and better yet what was she doing with her life? This was not was she was born to do, nor what she intended to ever do. She was acting like a lazy muggle who didn't want to do anything but complain about how awful her life was, when it really wasn't as awful as she thought. Yet it seemed that all this time she had been upset over nothing she would once again reclaim her title and return to her everyday lifestyle. And no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't figure out why there felt like a piece was missing.

She needed everything to be back to normal. She wished to speak with Draco again, she wished to go to a lesson, and she demanded to get homework, and that's precisely what she did. She got up, took her shower, and before she went to lessons she drank the last of her whiskey without realizing or caring about what it actually was and fell onto her bed. Her eyes glued shut and she was finally into the deepened sleep that she wanted in the first place, and thus it began…

_The morning sunshine set on the castle and as Hermione opened her eyes, she cowered away into the darkened corner and out of sight. Not to be seen, not to be heard, and never to be noticed at all. She planned her day quite calmly as she shut the curtains quick as a rabbit before it burned her eyes. She rubbed her tongue against her sharpened fangs as she bent over a book in front of her. Searching for a spell, and not knowing which one to use or which one to consider at all._

"_Too complicated…" She sighed. "What should I use?" _

_Her cauldron began to bubble a liquid bronze color before she even dropped any of the ingredients in at all. She stepped back, waiting for something like an outburst of anger or a burst of fire to kill her, but she remained calm and the cauldron barely even boiled at all, but instantly she waved her wand over it and the bubbles parted, revealing a face wit in the tiny bubbles of potion that were thick like tar. Hermione took a deep breath and, with a smile, she bowed._

"_Master," She said warmly. "Such a pleasure it is." She smiled._

"_Granger, I've told you over and over again about your task, and why haven't you done it?" He demanded. "Do you feel no need to listen to me?"_

"_No, master," she smiled. "I listen well, but I want it done right. There is no room for errors, and there is no room for mistakes. Please have faith in me master." She begged. "I want this done just as badly as you do."_

"_Granger, I am counting on you. How much time do you feel you'll need?" He wondered._

"_Till midnight sir, depending on how long this potion takes to make. I'll slip it into a drink, and by tomorrow morning no one will ever know what actually happened and everyone will realize their perfect star has disappeared." She smiled._

"_Excellent, get going, you have until midnight, and remember it's not morning. To you it feels like it, but it's actually dusk. You have until midnight my pet, and how lavishly you shall be rewarded. I am counting on you, and please don't fail me." He growled eagerly. _

"_Never, master, never." She bowed._

_With that he was gone as she was left alone. She stirred the potion in the cauldron once counterclockwise, and then three times clockwise. She added a vial of doxy eggs, knotgrass, a lacewing fly, and a large drop of dragon blood. Her cauldron roared with anger as the steam rose and began to curl from the outside to the inside. It drained the bubbles into a glittery substance and crystal clear it began to settle. She smiled happily, filling a bottle and keeping it within her coat, and she returned to the outside._

_She followed the corridors, hiding her teeth quite well, and when she reached the Gryffindor corridor she approached the door. She looked at the lady with a sharp eye, and before even trying to guess the password the Fat Lady opened up with a shriek of fear in Hermione's once-gentle gleam. She entered, seeing her target alone on the couch, and with extreme caution she approached him._

"_Hermione!" He said happily. "Where have you been? I've been looking all over for you" He smiled._

"_Oh, yeah, sorry about that Harry… just been a bit worked up over homework and stuff." She said with a great sigh. _

"_You look sick," He mentioned. "You're practically paler than Hedwig's feathers." He laughed. "Maybe you just have lack of sleep, how about you go get some?"_

"_No, Harry," she assured. "I am quite alright." She smiled._

"_Are you sure about that because…" She cut him off._

"_Yes, I am absolutely fine, I just need a drink, but how have you been doing?" She asked, walking over to the table and splitting a bottle of butter beer._

"_I've been great. A bit stressed over a bunch of things, but I think I'm okay for now. I dunno about Ron though… he sure has been acting funny." Harry said suddenly._

"_Couldn't imagine why." Hermione said as if she hadn't started paying attention till just then. _

"_I think it has something to do with the fact that we barely saw you at all this entire week. I think he fancies you, Hermione, and I dunno if that's good or bad, but it's a bit awkward being around him now." Harry said sadly._

"_He's wasting his time." She said rudely. "Now, how about that drink?"_

"_No thank you," Harry said politely. "I'm good."_

"_Awww," Hermione said falsely. "But I just poured you some."_

"_Oh, ummm, okay…" He sighed. "I guess I'll have a bit."_

_She nodded gently and with a smile of mysteriously evil she walked back to her seat. She took a sip of hers and he took a small sip of his. It seemed like it would take a while to kick in before the poison had successfully flowed fully through his body in such a small sip. Hermione took one last sip and in the process of setting her glass down she screamed and clutched the glass so hard within her fingers that she shattered it. She grasped her right forearm and gasped at the large amount of pain._

"_What's wrong?" Harry asked, walking over to her. "Let me see."_

"_NO!" She pushed him away. "I just got cut a little that's all, no big deal… I can handle it." She said nervously._

"_Don't be ridiculous!" He insisted. "Show me! Please?" _

"_NO I SAID!" Hermione battled back, but Harry had grabber her arm. _

_Before she even realize what was going on Harry had seized her arm and pulled her sleeve up. With an amazed look of horror and surprise he backed away. There on her right forearm was the mark. Its snake picture slithered along her arm as she twitched viciously at him and Harry took a few more steps backwards and turned to run, but she stopped him. He turned to her with a look of amazed betrayal all over his face, and not one nice thing he would give her after this._

"_How could you?" He asked, glaring at her._

"_How could I what?" She asked with a sneer. "I fell in love with you to find that there was someone else and that I have no reason to even be alive. So I pictured myself as a servant and here I am."_

"_You are the one that betrayed me and slept with someone else! And now you're helping him… you're trying to kill me?" He asked, angered._

"_No, I have already attempted to kill you." She smiled. "I dosed your Butter Beer with Painful Poison. This means you have about 20 minutes to live. I did nothing but apologise."_

"_You are lying." He growled. "Okay, I get it, haha, the jokes over… you can stop now Hermione."_

"_My service to the Dark Lord is no joke, and I will kill you Harry Potter. Mark my words." She smiled. "He even was kind enough to grant a wish, and turn me into a powerful creature."_

"_A snake?" He asked with a snip in his voice._

"_Come now, Harry, we are mere children." She taunted. "I am a full fledged Vampire, and if the poison has no effect then I do have another way."_

"_I…I feel dizzy… and funny inside…" He shuddered. "And cold…"_

"_I see the poison is working well after all." She smiled._

"_Hermione, I never would have expected this from you… for I have always loved you." He said, falling to his knees in pain._

"_Too late now isn't it? The Dark Lord has risen and you, Harry Potter, have fallen. We have finally won the battle." She smiled. She watched him slowly fade away. "Finally, you're dead."_

Hermione woke with a start and she felt very awkward about herself. She felt very dirty and very dizzy. She turned and felt no clothing… she was naked. She turned to her side and with a half scream she saw Draco lying beside her, exposed as well, and sleeping soundly. The feeling of pressure finally returned to her, and the problem was her waking up situation. She found someone completely different then she wanted in her bed, and had a dream about killing the man of her life and waking up with… a smile. Once again, the puzzle loses another piece.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

**Author's Notes:**

**Kay, this is going to be my last chapter for a while, because school starts again tomorrow and I don't know when I'll actually have time to write or post. Hope you like it though, it's a bit longer than usual. Thanks for reading!**

**To My Reviewers:**

**FroBoy – **Better question, how is Harry going to react to this? Haha.

**thealphamale – **If it bothers you so much then don't read it. I am not the only one that writes them and it's my freedom of speech to say that I can find good in evil and someone who caused me a lot of mental pain I can find some possible way to forgive them. Obviously, though, some people are a bit more on the blame side. I'd suggest growing up.

**toga party – **Yeah, they worked. Thanks for that though. I'm agitated to see Rupert Grint's new movie Driving Lessons, because it looks way too funny. They used both Ron and Mrs. Weasley from Harry Potter in that movie, so should be good! I'm excited! Glad you liked the last chapter, and hope you like this one.

**missradcliffe – **It's okay, I just was like "woah, that's weird" when I read your review. Before I could bring Harry into the picture I needed to do one last thing to make things even difficult for Hermione. This is when the potion starts bubbling -

**sakura-sweeti – **I liked the shout out too, and you probably hate me after this, but I have an awesome plan from where I end the story I have an easy pick up at a sequel. I have a brilliant idea, so I'm really sorry if you didn't like where this story went, and if you find it confusing then that's good! You have to be Hermione, I want my readers to relate to her, for if this happened to you wouldn't you be confused too? Haha, hope you are well.

**That's all for now!**

**UPDATED: (TUESDAY) SEPTEMBER 5, 2006 – If anyone would like to view some music videos that I made of Harry Potter, then email me at:**

**Airalynnmay2008 at hotmail dot com. I'll send you the links there.**

**Airalynn**

"**_Sweet chocolate relieves my pain, the pain of my heart as it slowly dies each day"_**


	16. Chapter Sixteen: A Series of Assumptions

**Chapter Sixteen:**

**A Series of Assumptions**

Hermione couldn't contain herself as she fell off the bed and backed away in horror. She looked around, feeling dizzy, and searching for her clothes. She couldn't understand how this happened. What the hell was going on? Was this a dream? She anxiously did a top to bottom search of her room, finding her clothes below the bed, and throwing her self out of the room and into the bathroom.

She kneeled upon the floor, her messy locks of brown hair covering her eyes, and she slowly began to cry. Everything was wrong, everything hurt, and everything was a mess. It had been bad before, but this time she didn't know how she'd even get up. She cried into the cold floor tiles as she felt the joy in her heart fall with a deep drop of confused guilt.

She rushed over, feeling an illness run through her veins like an electric shock, when she turned and rested her head upon the seat of the lavatory. She slowly began to gag on her thoughts of the previous night and wished to God that it had been a dream, only a dream, for she would never had been so stupid and done something like that. She began to choke and eventually coughed up the whiskey she had drunk.

She let out a piercing cry, feeling everything inside her die, and coughing into the shallow bowl. She pulled her hair back, swearing at herself, and finding the need to want to die. She had betrayed him, but she insisted to tell her self that it might not had been what it looked like. She wanted to throw herself within the tub and drown her sorrows away, but she couldn't draw herself into doing so. She coughed again.

She couldn't look, she didn't know what to think, and she didn't understand what had happened. She was blank. Her sorrow began to fill to the extent that she felt the need to no longer breathe and it hurt to do so. She began to choke as if the air was taken from her, and coughed her self onto the icy floor and began to cry out as if Harry had been listening, but it wasn't Harry.

"Hermione?" A voice said outside the door. She had grabbed a towel quickly and wrapped it neatly around her.

"Go away." She cried.

She gasped greatly, breathing freely for one splint second, and then letting the pain worsen as if daggers were stabbing her from every angle possible. She gasped again, each shock of regret hitting her fiercely and expanding immensely. She drew her head down hard into the tile, hoping she could harm herself enough to forget, and did not move when the door had begun to creak open.

"Hermione, are you alright?" He asked, looking in behind the solid oak.

"Look at me," she cursed. "Of course I'm not alright." She hissed.

"Hermione, why are you doing this? Is it because of last night?" Draco asked, walking towards her.

"Of course it is, Draco!" She cried. "Look what we've done, but most of all look how much I've ruined things. I don't love you, nor do I understand what happened."

"I don't suppose you would, after all you were…" He stopped himself.

Her eyes had sprung to meet his, each dripping with regretful tears that poured like an angry dog's bark. She looked at him with anger and fear and she stood within her deep crimson red towel and faced him with a look of anger. She stood her ground in front of his pleasure-full eyes as she began to realize this as if it were a plan. She stood there, breathing anger, and opened her mouth.

"You… you set me up!"

"Oh, come now." Draco said with a cold laugh. "How in the world could I have set this up?"

"Well, first you come off as if you want to be friends when my entire life at Hogwarts you put me through hell, and then randomly it's a strong bond and you fall in love with me? Me, a muggleborn, and thus you create a grand annoyance through the years as every Slytherin called me a mudblood. So then you spring this news on me and I get side trapped in the moment and I kiss you, and thus I began to drink away my pain through Fire Whiskey and get an unexpected visit from someone, and basically here I am, wearing my ENGAGEMENT ring and finding out that I woke up next to you." She breathed deeply after talking so quickly she felt the anger rise higher than imaginable. Half of it no one could even understand, for it hadn't made sense.

"So you cheated on your fiancé, and yet you yell at me when you were the one that was drunk." He said, folding his arms.

"You took advantage of me! You should have just brought me back to my room and refused to sleep with me and just walk out." She growled. "That's what _friends_ do."

"I wanted to be more than your friend at the time," he said sadly. "And as sadistic as it sounds, if I didn't allow myself to you I would have regretted it for the rest of my life, knowing I would never know what it might have been like when I had the chance to find out."

"You're a pig."

She angrily left the room, walking back and forth without knowing how to act, or what to say to him ever again. She begun to felt a weird prick in the back of her mind, like a burst of fear, for what if Harry found out? She'd be ruined, and thus she would find herself alone in the world, just because of this fate. She stopped dead in her tracks. She faced him with utter fury.

"Now I understand it. What have you done to me?" She demanded.

"What are you talking about?" He said instantly, as if she was going crazy.

"The dreams… they were you. The dreams I've been getting over and over and over again." She said anxiously. "This was a plot, for you needed to find a way to break us apart! You're the one that dared me to bring in the Whiskey, you're the one that made me so mad with stupidity that I was driven into drinking it, you're the one that kissed me, and you are the one who took advantage of me. You used me!" She growled. "So then I would maybe follow my dreams and allow service to the Dark Lord and thus be the only one to make Harry Potter weak."

"I…" He was interrupted.

"I'm not finished!" She snapped. "You slipped a page under my pillow a few nights ago that was directions to finding a book of poisons in the restricted section. I know it was you, for you are the only one with access to this common room. Then a few nights ago, by the fire, I told you about the time I told Harry how much I was fascinated with Vampires and I'd give anything to feel the same way one does just for a day, so you gave that information to your master." She pointed, stepping one foot fiercely in front of him. "So your master would think that in exchange for Harry leaving me I would desire revenge and make a deal with the Dark Lord, he would turn me into a vampire and in exchange for the gift I'd have to successfully kill the Great Harry Potter. Only then could the Dark Lord rise to power and be indomitable." She took deep heavy breaths.

"Not a bad assumption." He noted, setting only of the old smirks across his face.

"I knew you hadn't changed." She sneered.

"You know nothing, Granger, nothing." He snipped.

"I know more than you give me credit for." She said angrily, walking towards the bathroom door again. "I will not let the Dark Lord get to me, and I will not allow myself to ever associate with you."

"Okay, but if you must know Granger it's not as bad as it sounds. You were drunk, but already passed out on your bed and when I walked in you woke up. You did come on to me, but I gave you a sleeping drought and I just made it look like we had shagged all night, and I was awake when you woke up. And I, knowing that you wouldn't check to see if I was wearing clothes or not, laid there waiting for your reaction. Nothing happened, you just assumed." He held his silver eyes away from her, looking at nothing in particular, and look back to see her amazed look.

"Why would you do something like that?" She asked, amazed.

"It was the task I was given, and I had to fulfill it." He said. "It was only you that wanted it to be more than a task. How fast Fire Whiskey kicks in is amazing, but I'm sure you already knew that."

"So I was right, but why did you make it look like we had done something, instead of actually doing it and ruining my relationship?" She asked, confused.

"Because," he sneered. "Who could ever love a Mudblood?"

* * *

Hermione has showered with a feeling of embarrassment in her, but felt also a bit of joy when she had entered the common room and found Draco's room completely empty and every trace of him gone. The only thing that hadn't made sense is for some reason she felt like a big piece of happiness just left, and seemed like sadness had disguised itself as happiness.

She felt betrayed and dumb with the fact that she had ignored everyone she ever loved and everyone who meant more to her, to be with someone she had believed changed. She felt stupid and a slight tinge of regret for not listening to Harry, when he had warned her all along to not trust him. She, though, was stubborn and let Draco enter and ruin the beginning of her relationship.

She entered the room, and as soon as she stepped in she felt pressure upon her shoulders, as if something bad was about to happen. She walked in, finding the very center and falling to her knees upon the silver rug and only then did she feel like she was in his shoes, afraid. Possibly there was more to him, maybe that wasn't really his task, and only him trying to break free.

She then felt heavy with thoughts about what really happened. The greatest one though was what if Draco was just afraid that the Dark Lord would kill him if he didn't fulfill his task, and then tell her those things just because he was told to? What if he was actually in the process of a rebellion? What if the dreams were not given to her by him but by Voldemort instead? What if he…

She looked up, staring at the green walls in shame and then she tilted her head low again, no. No way, he was a Malfoy and there was no way he could have actually felt anything but disgust towards her. She felt this room was the exit to happiness and into a troubled life and once, for the first time in her life, even after he had done something wrong, did she admire and pity Draco Malfoy.

She closed her eyes for a mere minute of thought and felt a rush hit her as her sadness was melted away and her happiness returned. She opened her eyes and looked around at what was revealed. The walls looked exactly like hers, in which the red and gold had brightly made a difference, and she turned. Every trace of Slytherin was gone. She had suddenly lost her breath once again in the troublesome day.

Her eyes filled with tears and her sorrows drifted away into nothing but pure ecstatic humor as she stood. She stared for a mere minute, in shock, but also in happiness as she found her self immobile. She found herself too shocked to move, but she wanted to run, for the time had passed. The room was the way it should have been all along and there in the doorway stood Harry.

"Hermione," he spoke as he dropped his bags instantly.

"Harry!" She cried in relief as she finally found the strength to run to him.

She wrapped her arms so hard around his neck that he had began to stumble backwards, and fallen upon the couch. He was weak, but he couldn't tell her that, for it was only her that could ever give him strength. She kissed him hard on the lips as the misery of his absence began to evaporate. She smiled between each kiss, not wanting to talk, but just to make up for lost times.

"Harry," she smiled through her tears. "Oh God have I missed you so." She said eagerly.

"And I you," he smiled. He kissed her one last time upon the lips and smiled. "I promise to never leave you again, and I'm sorry for what has happened."

"It's not you're fault," Hermione said instantly. "Ron was just…"

"No, no, no, Hermione," Harry stopped her. "I'm sorry about what happened here, between you and Malfoy." He said with a frown.

"How… How did you know?" She asked, amazed. "I'm guessing Dumbledore told you, for that man knows everything."

"No…" he said, surprised. "Actually it was Malfoy. He told me that he had to tell you something, but you would refuse to see him, so he gave me the message."

"I don't think I want to know." She said, fearfully. "But, let's hear it anyway, just because it will bother me later."

"Okay, well, he told me to tell you that the difference between the inside and out when it's raining is that when you're inside the rain tempts you to go out, but when you are already out you are nothing but free." He said and Hermione thought for a bit. "Then he said something about the rain doesn't lie to you or someone else when they are in the rain, or something, but then he was taken away."

"By who?" Hermione wondered.

"The same guard of the prison that brought me here." He stated. "He was actually very kind for being a guard of a prison."

"How so?" Hermione asked, sensing a bit of sarcasm.

"He kept telling me that if I didn't shut up he'd put me back in there." She started to laugh. "Yeah, worse part it, I wasn't talking. It was some random parrot that was attached to his hat, but kept talking to me." She only laughed louder.

"Oh my," she kissed him. "I am just happy you're home." She smiled. He had kissed her back and back and forth did they begin, when she had stopped. She realized that in the rain had she kissed Draco, and then did he mean it was not a lie. "I love you, Harry." She smiled, kissing him, and then pulling away. "Oh! I almost forgot!" She said instantly, "come, I have something to show you!"

She pulled him from the couch and into her room. She sat upon her bed and he lay beside her, practically melting into her voice that he had missed so much. She smiled down on him as she showed him the palms of her hands and the face of a girl erupted and in a shriek of joy had she made when she saw Harry, and then leisurely calmed down. Harry looked up at Hermione, with a smile, as she looked into the spidery script.

"Rayne, we have so much to tell you…"

* * *

**Author's Note:**

**Hey everyone, I realize I'm EXTREMELY late for when I promised to update, but I haven't exactly been having a great time, for a lot of things have been going wrong in my life and I just needed time to collect myself before I started writing again. I'm terribly sorry though.**

**Once again, I am REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY………… REALLY REALLY sorry:(**

**To My Reviewers:**

**sakura-sweeti – **You are the only one who reviewed my last chapter and I thank you, because it honestly means the world to me. It make insanely happy to know that someone out there appreciates my writing, for my parents keep telling me that if I keep writing I will then be a "starving Artist" and then basically waste my life. I don't think I am an awesome writer, I do not think I am a wondrous writer, and I sure don't think I am better than anyone else. I am just good. I'm an okay writer, but it's twice as hard to say that when your parents believe that your sadness is their happiness. Maybe I should stop writing.

I don't know if I want to go any further with this or not, depends on my mood and how much people want me to update. And also you're probably annoyed with this message for I randomly open up to you and let a thousand people read this, but I know you'll read it, and I know I can trust you. Thank you, for listening.

**UPDATED: (SATURDAY) NOVEMBER 11, 2006 – November Birthday wishes!**

**1.** Happy Belated Birthday to **Chris Rankin **who plays **Percy Weasley. **His Birthday: **8th**

**2.** Happy Belated Birthday to **Brendan Gleeson** who plays **Mad-Eye Moody.** His Birthday: **9th**

**3. **Happy Almost Birthday to **Alfonso Cuaron **who directed **Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban.** His Birthday: **28th**

**That's about it!**

**Airalynn**

**Quote: **

"**Most of us go to our grave with our music still inside of us. It's the one thing that never dies." Me**


	17. Chapter Seventeen: Love is Returnable

**Chapter Seventeen:**

**Love is Returnable **

Harry's eyes widened with a certain desire to know why she had not showed him this before, but even if she had there was no way he could use it anyway. He just watched her, amazed by every move she made, and yet he had a feeling in the pit of his stomach. He sensed something horrible going on that she kept from him, but he couldn't figure out why he would feel like that was going on. He trusted her enough to love her and she him, didn't she?

As Hermione stayed in tune with the conversation Harry soon saw Ginny's face erupt from the silky material. He became slightly confused when he called her Rayne, but shrugged it off, for they were probably nick names that had given each other as a cover up type thing. He wondered if perhaps Hermione would ever show him how to do this, and what sort of nickname they'd give him. Why not just Harry, so no confusion necessary, but then he remembered that the names were probably important to remember at some point.

Ginny looked quite sad for a moment, but then she fell mute. As she sat in complete silence, Harry decided to speak. Ginny looked less happy, but more shocked beyond all reason. Harry felt embarrassed as he studied her face. She looked so angry, and did not seem even glad that he had been back. He kept thinking that perhaps she too hated him, but these thoughts soon left his head when suddenly Ginny's silence turned into a heart filled explosion.

"Harry!" She said in excitement and a slight tinge of left over shock, "Welcome back! Wait, are you really back? Of course you are, why wouldn't you be, but no one told me anything! So I assumed Hermione went to visit you and she was there letting you talk to me, but I recognize that Head Girl room!" She started speaking faster and faster, finally Harry broke her rant so she could breathe.

"Ginny," He said calmly. "Calm down. I didn't really tell anyone I was returning. Well, I assumed Dumbledore would know, but I expect he wanted it to be a secret." He smiled kindly.

"Well that's no fun!" Ginny whined. "I like to know things!"

"Well, you know now." Harry said, cluing in the obvious voice that made her feel pretty stupid. "The only ones who know I'm here are Dumbledore, Hermione, Malfoy, and now you. To everyone else I'm not here." He said.

"You're like a surprise!" Ginny said playfully. "We should shove you in a box and bring you to a party, so you can jump out and go all like nuts and scare everyone in the room." She laughed.

"You're nuts, Gin." Harry laughed. "What happened to the clam-peaceful child?"

"I killed her."

"Oh… wow… sorry to hear that." He joked. "But honestly, I need no party." He said instantly. "My arrival is not worth a celebration."

"Oh, Harry," Hermione said in bored tones as she finally decided to cut in. "You're worth more than a celebration." She smiled.

Suddenly there was an instant of awkward silence in the room. Harry and Hermione had suddenly stopped talking as Harry felt a certain tinge in the back of his mind with annoyance. Hermione said nothing, for she understood not why he had stopped talking. To her he suddenly seemed angry with what she said. He acted as if it offended him so, but she could not understand why. It wasn't like she meant to. She just couldn't understand why he seemed so upset.

"Hermione," Ginny said warily. "I think you guys need to talk, I'll catch you later." She said softly.

Hermione went to respond, but by the time she said anything Ginny had left and the web of communication was no longer an item but an eruption of glittery sparks that slowly disappeared into the air. Hermione turned back with sorrow filled eyes and matched Harry irritated ones. Hermione wiped her hands upon her jeans to rid them of the tingly feeling they left every time the web closed. She shook her head and suddenly found no words to say, but attempted to speak anyway.

"Alright," Hermione sighed. "What's wrong, love?" She questioned.

"Why must you do that?" He asked, irritation screaming in his skin.

"What are you talking about?" She wondered. "Are you feeling alright?"

"No, Hermione, I'm not alright." He growled. "Why must you talk like its okay that I came back or I should be proud for getting out? I was in JAIL, Hermione, not at some wacko summer camp where they liked to beat the living daylights out of me to build character. I attacked my best friend, for attacking you, yes, but he was still my best friend. Jail changes people." He said angrily. "You can't just expect me to come home, go to a party, and forget it ever happened by picking up where we left off. It doesn't work like that." She looked like she was about to say something else, but he stopped her. "It just doesn't."

"Harry," She said with tear filled eyes. "What has gotten into you?" She asked in worried tones.

"Have you not listened?" He yelled again. "Jail changed me Hermione." He said eagerly. "Don't you understand? Why must you believe life is still all fun and games and not serious? It is serious Hermione… it is. You can't slide your way through life, and I don't intend on attempting to do so. I don't know about you, but I'm sick of playing this game of chess we play."

Hermione shook her head fiercely. Her love to him was a game? No, it couldn't be, he had played her? After all that happened it just couldn't be true, but yet he said so. She knew it wasn't fun and games, but she was just happy that he was back in her life, but there was a glitch in her thoughts. It seemed to be true that he had lost her in the process of returning home. She lay on the bed, her face covered in tears, and looking up to the ceiling.

"Could it be that you no longer love me?" She asked her heart ripping into the million pieces she swore would never happen.

"No, of course not Hermione, but I thought the exact opposite." He answered. "You were right, that one night in the rain, it was me. I was the bird that escaped from the prison. I only was able to by Dumbledore, though. He told me I wasn't supposed to let anyone see me, but I had to check up on you." He sighed. "You weren't wearing the ring, and that tore me apart. So I thought maybe you had forgotten me."

"Never, Harry, never." She said instantly. "I didn't want people to know yet, nor did I want to find out what they would think of me. Then you came and gave me the strength to realize that I loved you, and that's all that mattered, so here." She said, showing her hand fully now. "I've worn it ever since, and no one has questioned me for I have been going to classes less frequently than before."

"Hermione," He said suddenly, feeling completely stupid and suddenly losing the point he originally attempted to make. "I'm sorry." He said. "I didn't mean to hurt you, you just made me so upset and I have assumed so much, but I was wrong. I made a mistake." He said sadly. "And I'm sorry."

"No, Harry," She said sadly, sitting up and putting her back to him. "I should have known you'd be like this. Such a rotten place that is there, and what they had done to you." She stood up from the bed, walking to him. "I was just, so scared that I lose you that I wanted to celebrate your arrival. Not as being proud but more as being happy that you have returned to me, when I have missed you so."

"I've missed you too, my dear." He said cautiously. "But when I read your letters about how close you were getting to Malfoy it scared me. I was so afraid that it was a trap that I could not save you from." He said, feeling the need to cry, but wouldn't let himself do so. He did not want her to see him weak. "You're my lifeline, love; if something happened to you then I would never be able to find the strength to live anymore." He said sadly.

"I wouldn't dare let him do anything to me, though." She said truthfully. "Many a night I have wasted in thoughts about what he true nature was and if he was attempting to disturb our happiness. Then I began to get to know him, and I found him to not be all bad, but then he played a rotten trick on me, and since I have not talked to him." She said honestly.

The silence once again initiated, but something teased Harry to ask Hermione a certain question that he was almost one hundred percent sure she would refuse to answer. He took a deep sigh, but he had to know. Hopefully they would promise each other no more secrets and live freely, like they once planned. Harry suddenly felt exhausted, and frankly he wasn't surprised. There, though, was no way he could ever sleep unless he knew the truth about Hermione and Malfoy.

"What happened in the rain?" Harry inquired.

"What?" She asked taken aback.

"When I ran into Malfoy he told me to tell you that the actions in the rain were not false, but I am confused. What happened in the rain that he so desperately needed to tell you was true?" He wondered.

"I can vaguely remember, Harry." She lied. "I drank a lot that night." She said.

"You were drunk?" He asked, just thinking of the possibilities that could have happened. "You made love to him, didn't you?" He asked, heartbroken.

"No, of course not," She said instantly. "I would not do that to you. I swear to you." She begged.

"Then?" He asked. "What happened?"

Hermione's mind spun in directions she never thought were possible. She felt dizzy, she knew she had to tell him the truth, but she also knew that he would never understand. She tried her best thinking of a way to cover it up, quickly before it got out of control, but it was no use. She could not think of a story in time to be sure that he believed her. She sighed, a regretful sigh and spilled the truth.

"I kissed him." She said regretfully. "I didn't know what came over me. I was just so upset, and then he began to comfort me, and I couldn't help it. I kissed him." She said, looking away in shame. "I tried to drink the taste out of my mouth and drink away the memory, but it was no use. The shame tore me up, and then you arrived, wings and all, and I crashed." She said, her tears filling with eyes again.

"I don't know what to say." Harry said in astonishment, after several moments of silence that inhabited the room.

"Don't say anything." She said angrily. "I've been through enough pain and punishment to deserve your compassion. I have been unworthy to you, Harry. And I have just remembered…" She said. She removed her ring from her finger, cried upon it for a mere second, and then placed it into his loving hand. "I don't deserve you."

Harry looked down at the ring. He knew people made mistakes and perhaps she was just caught up in the moment. He had been there before. Sure, he didn't approve of her kissing Malfoy, but he could see how sadly she shook. He knew how much pain she had put herself through, and he couldn't allow it to happen anymore. He wanted to spin her around, kiss her, and have it end right there. He caught his breath, but as soon as he called out her name, she was gone

* * *

Hermione wiped the tears from her eyes and realized that she had a score to settle. Soon her eyes glazed over with dried tears, as anger began to fill her head and it made her tears stop completely. She marched her self down to the eagle statue, and began to persistently demand for the correct password into the Headmaster's chamber. She was getting absolutely no where. It would not spring to life, and she didn't have much time before Harry had found her again to attempt to fix things. 

"Lemon drop… licorice snap… bubble gum… Bertie's botts!" She growled. It wasn't working.

"I'd suggest using Rainbow dots." A raspy voice said behind her. She turned sharply to see Dumbledore standing presently in her presence.

"Sir!" She said suddenly. "I must ask you something." She said. "I'm sorry to bother you, but it's quite important." She said.

"Ah yes, I see our young Mr. Potter has returned." He said matter-of-factly. "I assume that is what this is about. Correct, Ms. Granger?" He asked.

"No… not exactly…" She said, thinking.

"Then perhaps where Mr. Malfoy disappeared to then?" He wondered.

"Yes!" She said worriedly. "Harry mentioned him being taken by guards, but what did he do sir?"

"I assure you," Dumbledore smiled. "Nothing wrong has happened. He simply wanted to visit his father. He has returned though, and I happen to know that he is staying in the Dungeons, with Severus." He smiled.

"Is he there now?" She asked.

"I would assume so, but Severus is out searching for potion ingredients, so I'm sure he is alone. You and I have both realized, Ms. Granger, that Draco has suddenly changed. I'm not sure if it was you who did so, or he, or just a simple rebellion against his father, but he refuses to stay with the rest of the Slytherins. He's beginning to realize the horror of the dark side, but I fear he is in danger also." He said wisely. "He may have the slyness to hide, but he can not outrun Voldemort." He said sadly.

Hermione went to say something else, but Dumbledore had walked up the stairs, and she wished not to disturb him again. When the gargoyle had returned to hiding the stairway, she turned and stood still for a moment. Dumbledore had told her so much and yet she thrived to know more, but for now she had to speak with him. She had to fix this awkward relationship they had suddenly created, and for once in a love long time she had forgotten about Harry Potter.

It was true she still loved him, but something was drawing her closer to Draco. She wanted to be closer to him, and she wanted to talk to him again, the way they used to, before they had stopped speaking. She walked towards the Dungeons, hating each layer as she walked, and listened to the water drip onto the floors in a horror filled crypt of the scene. She, though, has been here many times, and the warmth that was once in her was now replaced with a freezing cold response.

She opened the door as a phantom breeze blew the curtains in the infinitesimal layers of drafts. Her heart had nearly skipped a beat, but she was determined to find Draco and settle this good for nothing game she most desperately wanted to forget. She looked around the empty classroom with a sigh. Where could he be? She looked around everywhere, but no source of him was present. She turned and turned and spun around, but she still had no luck.

"Draco?" She asked as her voice echoed in the empty abyss. "Draco, please, we need to talk." She said gently.

"Go away." A deep voice said from no where. She could not find the source of the voice. She sighed.

"Please, we need to talk." She said sadly. "You win." She said. "My relationship is shot to heavens; for I'm pretty sure it's over now." She said.

"Oh and why is that, Granger?" He asked with an honest desire to know.

"We had a fight about what happened between us." She spun around once again. "About what happened between you and me, I mean." She said sadly. "He said nothing, but I stated that I was unworthy and that I didn't deserve him." She said. "Look," She held her hand up. "My finger is bare."

Silence had come onto her again and this time she felt more uncomfortable than she did when Harry had not spoke. She gingerly moved the strands of hair from her eyes and looked around. Suddenly she turned, and she immediately jumped. There he stood, jumping down from the rafters, and into her presence. He did not smile, he had no emotions at all, but he had checked her finger with the greatest amount of curiosity he had ever handled in his life time.

"So, you really did leave him." He said. "But why, you loved him."

"I still do." She said. "But I need to know something." She said sincerely.

"What?" He asked embarrassed.

"I must know if you love me." She said sadly.

"Pfft, what would give you that idea, Granger?" He asked, his ego expanding into a direction that seemed almost impossible to reach.

"You told Harry something, to tell me." She said. "You said things that happen in the rain are not lies." She said reasonably. "We had kissed in the rain, Draco, once upon a time. We had fun then, and I had forgotten everything that happened before." She said. "But we had shared those moments. Were they wasted minutes Draco? Were they?"

"No, Hermione." He said, eliminating the tendency of using her last name. "They were not washed out anything." He said suddenly.

"What does that mean?" She asked curiously.

"Those moments were with you, Hermione, they could never be wasted." He said truthfully, her insides tore at her from every angle.

"You do then, don't you?" She asked.

"Love you?" He wondered and then sighed. "That is a only a mere part of the feeling I have for you. If I said I didn't love you, I'd be lying to the world, Hermione. You, though, don't deserve me. You must go, fix things with Potter." He said sadly. "That's who you are meant to love."

"Draco…" She cried.

"Don't speak." He said, kissing her one last time on the lips. "That's for what could have been." He spoke softly. "Now go. Fix things." He said sadly. "You need him, and he you. Now go, before the opportunity dies and you'll regret it the rest of your life. Love is not something you can return. You have to go to him... now!"

"What about you?" She asked.

"Don't worry about me," He said gently. "I leave in the morning."

"You can't." She said. "Where are you going?" She wondered.

"Out of your life."

* * *

**Author's Notes:**

**Hey everyone. I know of a few people that want to kill me right now because I haven't updated, but I seriously didn't have the time. I have two different jobs now, my grades kindof insanely dropped so I had to flip to get those better, and now I'm going pretty steady. I'm going to start writing a little of the next chapters to this story each day, and then post either Saturday or Sunday of every week. I apologize again for being late at this, but I put a lot of juicy stuff in this chapter for you to enjoy!!!!**

**I love you all!!**

**To My Reviewers:**

**Toga Party – **Thank you so much for your support with everything, and I really should think of all that you do just to read more of this story and yet I have written none. I'm starting to doubt my writing abilities and I just so badly want to quit, but slowly I am rising back up and I just can not stay away. I apologize for taking so long again; I've been a bad writer. Only good writers can write even with a writer's block, but yet I can not master that skill.

**sakura–sweeti – **I always love your reviews, they make me laugh so hard because you seem so wrapped up in my story yet I have given you nothing in return and I doubt you even remember the first chapters because it had been so long. I need you to be my watch guard, to make sure I get my chapters out, haha. I'm so glad you're sticking by me though; I love your enthusiasm dearly. This chapter is for you mainly, you talked about loving juicy stuff awhile ago, and this one is packed FULL of it! I really hope you like it. It took me a while to get the perfect mood and dramatic-ness of the story. Haha, I love Drama D

**FroBoy – **Thank you so much. I really hope you can review again.

**missradcliffe – **Hey, I see how it confused you now. I attempted to sum it up more in the beginning of the story. I really tried, I hope it helped!

**pstibbons – **Honestly I don't see how they were confusing, because I wrote them pretty clear. The reason why Ron was so OOC was because I personally _hate_ the character. I hate him with a passion, so I basically make him evil in my stories. I don't know why I hate him so much… I just do.

**That's it!**

**Airalynn**

**UPDATED: (MONDAY) MARCH 12, 2007 – 13 days ago I turned Seventeen, if anyone cares P**

**QUOTE:**

"**People believe in good luck charms because they don't have enough faith to believe in their own abilities." –Afton 3**


	18. Chapter Eighteen: New Alliances

**Chapter Eighteen:**

**New Alliances**

In the darkness of the Dungeons, the artistic features of Draco's face now showed more by the fading candle light that was the only light in the room. Hermione had not noticed these features before, but suddenly caught on. What had gone on in the last couple of minutes, in the dark, had been very confusing to her. She had come here to talk, that was it, but she became aware of the fact that things were getting very far out of hand. Draco, in Hermione's opinion, seemed to be chasing something that was impossible to obtain: her.

"Draco," Hermione said gently. "What is it that you want?" She asked.

"I can't answer that," he stated. "You don't love me, Hermione, so it wouldn't matter at all anyway."

"Of course I don't love you, Draco." She said dumbly. "I love Harry more than anything, and I don't wish to leave him alone when I know he needs me. I will not stop loving him, for I can't stop. He is everything to me." She explained.

"I know I can not compare after all the torment I have cost you in the past." He said sadly. "I simply wished."

Hermione listened closely to his words. She felt her stomach turn over and twist into uncomfortable knots as her heart tore from every angle. These saying he said broke her heart, but the truth was she didn't love him at all. She did though, want his acceptance as a friend though, and then he had blew it out of proportion. In a split second he had started to lean down, hoping to steal just one last kiss from her lips, but when there were centimeters apart she drew away quickly. She took a step backwards, confused beyond all reasons.

"No, Draco," Hermione said flatly. "It's not fair. We are mere friends and that is all we'll ever be. We can't do this Draco, don't you see? I'd be destroying everything. I shouldn't even be here. This is betrayal to my love to Harry and nothing can change that." She said sadly. "I have wasted months worried about Harry and worried about you… I'm running out of time to enjoy my self and read in the gardens like I used to." She explained.

"But I don't understand something," he said sadly. "You kissed me, but why would you do that if you didn't love me?" He wondered. "I just don't understand."

Hermione paused without a word in her head. She had no idea what to say, or even think for that matter. She stood; looking like a burning flat iron has struck her across the face, when she had not seen this question coming. She barely breathed, fearing to say the wrong things and upsetting him. She had to face him at one point, though. The problem was she just could not look at his face without with out it tormenting her for hours after saying such things. She took a deep breath, held it for what felt like forever, and quietly let it out.

"I wasn't thinking," she said uneasily as her throat became dry and she began to gulp more now then recently.

"Bloody hell," he cursed. "You seemed to be completely in control and sober at the time it happened… a little after was the other way around though." He said, mumbling the last bit.

"Look, Draco," she said angrily. "I made a mistake. People do that. No one is perfect, and I am sick and tired from blaming myself so much!"

"You shouldn't blame yourself for anything, Hermione." He said calmly. "But you also shouldn't have attempted to drink your pain away either. It doesn't solve anything!" He insisted.

"It seemed like the only opportunity at the time!" She swore. "It seemed like the only way out, and I admit I am stupid, but I can't change what I have done." She cried. "Things just happen."

"There's always another opportunity, Hermione, if you think it out clearly." He said categorically. "You are smart, but you love the attention, and love making people pity and feel sorry for you." He said childishly.

"No I don't!' She yelled. "How can you think something like that?" She demanded. "You don't know me at all." She said angrily. "You're not who I thought you were… its good you're leaving. Good riddance!" She yelled.

"That's the point, Hermione!" Draco yelled back. "I don't know what to think anymore! I just think it, and I can't help myself from thinking it…. It just happens!" He said angrily. "Is that a CRIME now?"

"Draco, I can't make myself love you." She said flatly. "You're trying to make me love you, but I won't even dare try and love you because I don't want you." She growled. "Sweet words can't just make me fall for you. You can't just say a few loving words to me and expect me to be all 'Draco I love you!!' It doesn't work like that!" She explained. "I love Harry, I need him. Not only because I love him, but because without him I am nothing. I am weak."

"So basically you love him for his bravery?" Draco asked irritably. "One little smooch and you'll be rushed down into the world of the fames." He added. "Do you love him, or his fame? Oh wait, don't answer that. It must be fame."

Hermione's mouth hurt like she had been trying to eat steel. She crushed her teeth together so hard that her jaw was becoming tired. She stepped forward, anger running through her like a pack of angry wolves, as it cursed her veins. She felt her blood begin to boil with every word that he rudely spoke. She became unsettled and disturbed by his words. She stepped forward again, growling with silent balls of anger erupting within her throat, as she swung her hand at him. It flatly crashed against his face as he recoiled away, covering his bright, burning, red cheek with is own hand as she cried.

"Never," She said angrily. "I would never love someone for fame, you foul mouth pig!"

"Then why won't you love me?" He asked, practically forgetting she hit him. "I'm not famous."

"I already told you!" She said furiously. "I can't make myself love you, I either do or I don't. It's that simple! I JUST DON'T LOVE YOU!"

"But, I," He started. "I am fascinated with you. I love you, Hermione. Why can't you understand?"

"Malfoy," She replied acidly. "Me? Not understand? You're a Slytherin, a Death Eater, a PURE blood. I am none of those, it doesn't and it will never work between us. Why can't _you_ understand _that_?"

He gave her a few moments to calm down, and she had rendered him speechless. She was right, and he realized it. He couldn't make her do anything that she didn't want to, but he wanted to try so badly. He didn't want to go down without at least one attempt to win her over. There they were, the game terms again, and he stood back and realized that through chess game terms were the only way to look over the situation. Draco was not even close to a gentleman, in Hermione's opinion. He was more of a monster.

"Potter," He stated sadly. "Is one hell of a lucky then, obviously, I have lost this battle." He groaned.

"It's not a battle!" She said instantly. "I am not an object up for grabs. Love isn't a game!"

"I know," he stated. "But, what if I changed? Then where would it be? Where would _we_ be?" He asked.

"If you ever do completely change, let me know, and we can be friend, but until then I do not wish to see you." She said, finally turning for the door.

"Hermione, wait." He said.

"No." She said, turning back and looking appalled. "I'm sick of waiting!" She began to yell louder this time. "I waited for Harry to get out of prison, I waited for someone else to come save me from Ron as he was in prison, I waited for Harry and I to be alone once again, I waited over and over again… I will not stand here and wait for you to convince me we're in love." She spat like acid. "I hate you." She turned once again.

"Her-" He started.

"I'm going to the gardens to read. Leave me be!" She said gravely. "I don't wish to see you again. We've cause enough chaos."

"But-" He stopped once again.

By the time he had gone to respond, she was out the door and gone. He stared at the space where her footprints led out and he look down on them, heartbroken. She seemed so angry with him, when it was not only his fault, but hers too. She seemed to blame him for everything, well, not everything. She did say 'we' as in both Draco and she caused the chaos of their marriage. Draco had only one thing to do now: fix the problem before it could get any worse

* * *

Harry sat upon the bed in the Head Boy room, where he now intended on staying and not returning to the Gryffindor Common Room. He sat there, in silence, as he looked over what had just happened and suddenly he felt lost within the world itself. Why had she done this? Why had he not run after her after she had done so? His head pounded as the past events flooded his mine with impure thoughts and confusion on how to fix what had been broken. He flopped over on the other side of the bed and stood, walking towards the sliding door, and onto the balcony.

Harry rested his arms against the ice cold cement balcony and smelled the wind that struck him at full force. He could taste freedom in the back of his throat, but something about the past situation made him feel like this place was not home. It was dressed like home, but the Hermione that he knew and fell in love with would never had let herself fall for someone like Malfoy. It all seemed surreal and somehow staged as if this were a plan, but not even he could think of something as low as that. He was weak, and his weakness was beginning to drive him mad.

He took one last inhale and then looked down. He spotted her, sitting in the garden, crying upon a book, and felt his heart rip in two. Why had he not said something to her instead of just letting her walk out of his life like nothing ever happened? He needed her, more than anything, and it was she that stripped him of his innocence back at the burrow, and never regretted it. Not once. He worried over her for endless hours, hoping she was well and okay and she never once wrote to him again after two weeks were gone. He saw his letters on the stand next to her bed, all unopened.

He looked down on her still, and how beautiful her hair blew in the wind. How sweetly she attempted to read but everything that was going on gently flowed from her regretful tears. He sighed and knew what had to be done; he had to speak with her, for he did not blame her at all. He never wanted her to get hurt, and by saying that he meant physically or mentally, but now it seemed she had been hurt by a little of both. He was one reason why she was so broken hearted, and it was he that only had the power to put things back to the way they were and the way it was meant to be.

"Potter," Harry jumped a bit and turned around to see who had addressed him.

"Malfoy?" Harry asked, surprised. "What are you doing here? I thought you were leaving."

"Not till morning, but…" He stopped. "I came here to fix something."

"Fix something?" Harry wondered, and then remembered the past principals that had happened so quickly. "Fix what happened while I was gone, right?"

"Exactly," He said angrily. "Look, Potter, nothing will ever change that fact that I hate you, but that creature down there crying, well, I have a different look of her." He explained.

"You're in love with her." He said emotionlessly. "I know."

"Bloody hell, Potter," Draco spat. "Of course I love her! But that won't change the fact that she loves you more than anything in the world." He said sadly.

"How do you know this?" He wondered.

"I know this because after you fought, she came to me. I tried my hardest to win her heart and I failed. She told me she loves you and no one else. Now that poor heartbroken girl cries down there because she is worried you no longer love her for what we had done. Honestly, though, Potter it isn't as bad as it may come out to be." He explained. "We did nothing but kiss and it was only because I confused her into doing so."

"Why would you do something like that?" He asked, disgusted. "You knew she was engaged to me, didn't you?"

"Actually, I didn't know until after we did it." He said, looking at his shoes. "Funny, she never did wear a ring."

"Well…" Harry said, starting to lose focus. "I imagine she didn't want to lose it." He stated immediately.

"Potter, it was her perfect fit. She couldn't have lost it unless she took it off and threw it into the woods or the lake. Other than that, she would have lost it faster by leaving it where she left it." He said. "I saw it on her nightstand a few nights ago, I was wondering if that was her ring, but I didn't ask. Didn't figure it polite."

"Since when are you polite, Malfoy?" Harry asked.

"Just because I'm a Slytherin doesn't mean I didn't learn manners. Frankly, I no longer wish to be a Slytherin, and that wonderful woman down there showed me how much better it was without evil in the world. Her, so pure and precise, and yet she won the heart of you, a fame sucking sponge."

"You're entitled to your opinion." He said angrily. "Though, it doesn't matter how hard you try, you'll still always be a snake." He said vehemently.

"Touché," Draco spoke suddenly. "Oh yes, I was supposed to be helping your relationship, how terrible of me to forget." He said. "Okay, well, here's the problem: I may be in love with her, but she pretty much has herself wrapped up in you. She does not wish to see me again, nor do I blame her." He said truthfully.

"I would have no control over it, but I wish she wouldn't see you either." Harry mumbled and then looked back up. "Anyway, go on." He insisted.

"Well," Draco continued, throwing him a heated glare. "I tried my hardest, but all she does it want things to go back to the way they used to be. All she wants is me to disappear, you and her to love one another again, for Weasley to come back into your trio and be how you guys were supposed to be." He stated. "Problem is I can't handle these lies anymore."

"Lies?" Harry wondered.

"You know," Draco said acidly. "It's funny how a stupid guy like you could end up with such a smart girl like her. She knows the truth, why don't you know yet?" He asked, irritated with himself. "I can't deal with this pretend-to-be-in-love bullocks. I hate that mudblood, I would never love her, and this is all a plan." He smirked. "Basically, when you find out the cold hard truth, you'll come after me, and of course, Potter, I will be waiting. I, though, will only merely look at you and laugh about how one small prank may have ruined your entire life." He laughed.

"You know the puzzles that I've been attempting to solve, don't you?" Harry asked angrily. "Who is the Minister of Magic? Why does no one know his name? Why does no one see him?" He asked angrily. "Tell me Malfoy, and never call her a mudblood again!" He demanded.

"Haha, but she is one, and no, figure it out yourself. No one knows his name because he doesn't want them to, and no one knows of his face because he masks it in public with another's." Draco said shortly. "You'll figure out sooner or later who it is, because your blood will soon be spilt upon his hands."

"Who is it?" Harry threatened. "Who is doing this?"

"Someone," Draco started. "You know quite well. Now, I must go finish the task I have been given." He said happily. "Oh, but don't worry, I don't need your help with it yet."

"Another plot to kill me, Malfoy? You really are running out of boring plans." He assured.

"Well, if Weasley hadn't been discovered then you would have been in jail longer, but because that clever witch remembered how to look into one's mind, you were put off the hook. I've run out of time, but I always have a secondary plan." He laughed evilly. "And, also, the mudblood will get what's coming to her also."

* * *

**Author's Notes**

**Okay, here's the scoop: I caught mono. I have nothing to do but sleep all day and I am terribly sick, so please bear with my awful chapters. Second thing: I realize that this chapter is 90 percent talking and horrific (as in badly written), but I did promise a chapter, so to my reviewers I ask you if I should re-write this and replace it next week or is it good enough to move forward on? I want this story to be perfect, but I did make a promise and promises come before perfection. You guys are my wonderwall. Thank you, to all of you.**

**Airalynn**

**To My Reviewers **

**MoogleX – **Don't worry, clearly, she does love Harry. See, no villain turns good; there is always a glitch in their reasons. Obviously, Draco is hiding something from you, and I, the writer, am the only one that knows what it is. Hahaha, lol, tune in. You'll see more, but I swear no more Draco/Hermione action.

**toga party – **That sounds extremely painful! OWWWW! Haha, I couldn't even imagine. But yes, I am back on task with this story! You must be real excited about that! Haha, now all I have to figure out is where to end it. I promise you, though, that I will not abandon it again. Someone has already stolen this story, and I do not intend on letting it happen again. By the way, can you do me a favor? Someone flamed my last chapter (his name is dark), you want to tell them off in your next review? I seriously have nothing to say to them. Thank you!

**dark – **MY REVIEWERS SAY IT ALL. --- Flamer

**sakura-sweeti – **Total cliffy just ended, you waited two whole days gasp have you survived? Haha, just kidding. I can't believe you like this story enough to print it off, most people read mine then read my sisters and then come back to me and basically tell me to kill myself because I'm not good enough. Yeah, real torture it is, haha. Like toga, I'll ask you for a favor too. A guy named "dark" flamed my last chapter. If you have anything to say to them about it, please do so… I'm too sick to say anything mean right now, like you probably read before: I have mono and I'm too weak to do anything. Thank you, though, for supporting me.

**Atelophobia – **Bai, you are nuts… haha. My story is really that bad? Lol… worse this is I can totally tell the pain you are going through. Lyke oh my gawd. Haha, I love it.

**That's it! Hope you had a great weekend everyone!!!**

**Airalynn**

**UPDATED: (SUNDAY) MARCH 25, 2007**

"**The role of a writer is not to say what we can all say, but what we are unable to say." Me**


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